Tagged: v/h/s
Cat Crazy: The Top 10 Feline Flicks of ALL time!!
It seems we have so many movies we can bring to mind that involve dogs as their stars, yet I’ve noticed when it comes to feline focused flicks there seems to be a bit of a shortage! Well I’m here today to give you a list of 10 of the best cat-riffic movies of time! The cat’s just don’t seem to get enough respect in the movie industry, I’m betting that is because it seems much more of damn hassle to get a cat do exactly what you want on screen, but cat lover’s rejoice- here’s some must see movies that you and your cat can get cozy with and have hours of serious bonding!!
1. Cat’s Eye (1985)
This one was a favorite of mine as a kid in the1980’s and it still holds up to this day! A great little three part horror anthology with the cat at the center of all the action. Especially in the the awesome third act of the movie where you get to see the feline do serious battle with a maniacal little troll!! My cat totally digs this one-it’s his favorite movie hands down!
2. Uninvited (1988)
Wow now this movie just plain RULES it! Total cheezy cat horror that’s bound to get any movie party in the mood to rage! This one features a cute little cat that’s got a demonic rat like creature living inside him that comes out to kill people when ever the cat get stressed out! The special effects in this one are awesome in the worst way possible! This freakazoid cat jumps onto a yacht with a bunch of dingbat college kids and some annoying criminals and has a jolly good time ripping them to shreds! A true feline classic!
3. The Cat From Outer Space (1978)
This one is a crowd pleaser for cats and humans alike! This one features a crashed spacecraft with an alien cat as it’s pilot. The cat’s got some weird ass name and he can communicate with humans. Of course the authorities are after the cat so they can do stupid experiments on it. But a man named Frank is there luckily to help this feline escape earth, kinda like E.T. with a cat!
4. Strays (1991)
Another domestic house cat horror flick, which my cat seems to always totally dig! This one features a family who adopt some strays but end up with a whole horde of vicious cats terrorizing their household! This one isn’t really going to scare anyone but it might make you think twice before letting the cute lil’ stray into your home for a bowl of milk!!
5. Felidae (1994)
This is a cool animated German feline flick that’s sure to get your cat’s heart a pumpin’! We have some great animation as well as a cool mystery that a cat decides to solve! This one might not be best for the little kids as it revolves around a string of cat murders in a neighborhood, but it’s a good one for any cat who’s looking for a little suspense between their naps!
6. The Black Cat (1934)
This one doesn’t have nearly enough cat action in it, but most cats will appreciate the fact that there’s a creepy black cat that causes a helluva lot of fear to some travelers who seek medical attention after an accident on the road in Hungary. The cat takes the back seat a bit in this one but at it’s core is the center of dread throughout the movie! Also cats seem to just dig the movie’s name a lot.
7. Aristocats (1970)
This is a classic cartoon for people of all ages and cats alike! This one involves some cats who inherit a mega fortune from their owner and a butler who’s pissed off about it! I guess I can kinda understand the butler’s frustration here, I mean what the hell are cats going to do with a bunch of money and material shit anyway?! Well the butler decides to kidnap the cats and from there a whole ball of kitty mayhem ensues!
8. Homeward Bound (1993)
Another Disney movie that this time features a real life cast of animals. It’s got a cat teaming up with a couple dogs who find crazy adventure as they head off to find their real owners! This movie had some controversy around it because of all of the dangerous scenes the animals filmed. But as far as I know none of the animals were harmed in the filming, just real stressed out! This one I recommend talking about with your cat before viewing it to see if perhaps it’s going to get upset about the controversial side of this one, but also be sure to mention it’s got Michael J. Fox voicing one of the characters and Sally Field as the cat. I mean that’s some serious star power right?
9. Sleep Walkers (1992)
This is a pretty rad Stephen King horror film about some weird ass people who can transform into “Were-cats” and choice of dinner is human virgins! Dang! Well it just so happens that their weakness is the domestic house cat who can see through their disguise and whose bites and claws can literally destroy them! My cat loves the final attack scene with the horde of house cats and the flaming explosion!! My cat totally loves Clovis the cat and has modeled much of his behavior after him!
10. A Cat In Paris (2010)
This one is a great animated foreign feature for the distinguished cat in the family! A great little adventure that features a cat who aides his owner in burglaries around Paris. Soon though the adventure really gets cookin’ when the cat himself has to help a little girl escape from the clutches of some evil gangsters! This one has it all mystery, action, class and cat courage galore!
and one more that deserves an honorable mention…
11. That Darn Cat (1965)
This one’s full of fun as a frisky cat aides a woman who’s been kidnapped find her freedom! The cat here leads the FBI on the ride of their life! If your cat likes vintage 1960’s fashion that’s a plus here too!
Fortress – Awesome 80’s Oddball Australian Survival Adventure at it’s BEST!!
So you’re looking for an awesome 80’s survival flick huh? Well look no further because “Fortress” from 1985 delivers the goods big time!! This one seems to be somewhat of a forgotten gem, it was released on HBO back in the 80’s and later in 86′ in theaters in Australia where the movie was produced. I take great joy in watching awesome (or bad) movies from the 1980’s that some slipped under my radar for some reason and this one pretty much non stop awesomeness. It tells the simple story of a school teacher who’s class comes under attack by shotgun wielding masked psychos hell bent on taking everyone captive and hiding them in a cave in the Australian outback.
All goes as planned until the teacher (Rachel Ward) decides to take matters into her own hands. You got a ton of action, some truly awesome locales, creepy bad guys (one who with a Santa Claus mask) and a bit of an Amblin “kids in danger” style film making here that was surely missed by the masses.
Right around the third act the movie gets pretty intense when the teacher and her students become a major force to be reckoned with. Almost transforming into bloodthirsty “Lord of the Flies” type savages the finale of this film is awesome.
Then add in the shocking end scene the movie becomes even more perplexing and unforgettable! Trust me if you’re a fan of weird 80’s horror/thriller/kids movie hybrid flicks then this one will not disappoint!! You can get this one right on Netflix too!
VHS Verdict: ‘Body Parts’ is a Forgotten Classic!
I do so much second hand shopping for my vintage clothing store Hollywood Babylon here in Portland Oregon and one of the best things about it is picking up awesome(or incredibly bad) old VHS tapes which end up for sale in the shop after I get done watching them!
Well one of my most recent viewings was a 1991 flick called Body Parts starring Jeff Fahey and Brad “Chucky” Dourif and let me tell you this one is a great creepy ass little horror flick!
I realize that this one here has pretty much been forgotten for some reason but it’s a well done thrilling and gory tale. It follows Fahey’s character Bill Chrushank as he loses his arm in an auto wreck and is given a chance to receive an arm transplant as a subject of a new experimental procedure.
Sounds like a bargain huh? Well that’s what Bill thinks until his arm begins to have mind of his own turning him into an aggressive dickhead who lashes out at his family! He begins a quest to figure out where this new arm of his came from and comes to find he’s not the only one who’s got recent limb transplants.
Nope he meets Brad Dourif who also got a new arm and has become a successful bizarro painter because of it. Shit gets pretty wild as the recipients of these limbs start winding up dead! This ones got it all, a clever creepy story, decent acting, gore, great fx work, action, car chases and some impressive stunts and some rad explosions!
A true forgotten and underrated gem of flick with a bit of an X-Files-ish vibe to it, in fact it seems to me that the X-Files may have stolen a bit from this one in the ‘I Want to Believe’ 2008 movie. Anyway hunt this one down it’s worth it!
VHS Verdict: Let the Highway to Hell Take You Back to the 90’s!
I recently scored this cool flick from 1991 on VHS- “Highway to Hell” is a ton of fun! This is a great, totally forgotten flick with an incredibly ridiculous plot to keep the party going. It stars Chad Lowe, you guessed it Rob Lowe’s lesser known younger brother as the teenage hero who must rescue his girlfriend Kristy “original Buffy the Vampire Slayer” Swanson from an evil demonic cop who kidnaps her. Where does he take her you may ask? The Highway to Hell duh! Check out the movie poster which for some reason Kristy Swanson decided not to be featured on?!
Chad Lowe quickly manages to get a rad old classic car from a weird ass gas station owner who just happens to know the the story of the creepy cop and the Highway to Hell-how convenient! He sends him off down the mythic highway in a scene which seriously calls to mind Marty Mcfly in the DeLorean in Back to the Future. Soon Lowe is transported to another dimension where he must venture to find his lost lover and encounter some familiar faces from the early 90’s, most notably Ben Stiller as a crazy diner cook and the sexy vixen rocker Lita Ford! Yeeeeah!
This one’s a cooky adventure filled with a ton of lovably stupid characters, cameos and early 90’s fashion. And some of the best damn hand cuffs in the history of all cinema! Add a goofy climax race scene against the demon cop arranged by Beezlebub himself and you’ve got a sure fire hit for lovers of bad cinema. Don’t take this one too seriously but do watch it with a bunch of friends and plenty of booze!
‘EXISTS’ is a Movie That Finally Makes Bigfoot Terrifying!!!
I love Bigfoot and the idea that somewhere out there in the woods there just might be an elusive creature roaming the woods that we truly don’t understand thrills me. Anytime I see a new Bigfoot story in the news I hope and pray that it’s one that finally proves to the world that this creature truly exists. Until that day comes that there’s definitive proof I’ll just have live this Sasquatch fantasy through grainy youtube vids and hearsay from “expert squatch hunters”. Now though at least we’ve gotten a great Bigfoot horror flick that finally makes Sasquatch scary thanks to Blair With Project director Eduardo Sanchez! His latest film ‘Exists’ which is out on several platforms like Googleplay, Itunes, VOD is one helluva nerve bending terror ride in the woods!
I’ve been looking forward to this one for a while as Sanchez has proven he’s got the chops time and time again in the directors chair. Unfortunately the down side of this flick (at least for me) is that he decides to go the “found footage” route. Yeah he may be considered the king of this genre because of ‘Blair Witch’ but I’ve gotta be honest, I’m fucking bored to death of this medium of film making. When I accepted that fact and sucked it up I truly began to see how effective of a horror flick he has delivered! There’s been quite a few flicks that have tried this over the last few years, The Lost Coast Tapes, Willow Creek, Bigfoot Country, The Woodsman to name a few. If you’re gonna see just one, see it from the master because ‘Exists’ will make you squirm in your seat and piss your britches!
Exists suffers and excels at the same time with a very simple premise: a group of twenty somethings head out for a weekend in the woods at the family cabin (sound familiar?) and on the way in they hit something with their truck. The film starts out with a great sequence here as one of the guys just happens to be obsessed with filming a Youtube video that goes viral. So of course this guy’s always filming, you know like ALL the time. But because we get a simple premise we also get a nonstop balls out ongoing confrontation with motherfuckin’ Bigfoot! That’s the good and that’s really all this film is trying to give us. Really what we have here is the ‘Jaws’ of Bigfoot flicks and that’s perfectly fine with me.
If these creatures are truly territorial then I imagine this here is exactly what it’d be like to fight for your life against one in woods. The incredibly creepy sounds the monster makes also seem to be pretty in line with some of the audio recordings by Bigfoot researchers, making me think Sanchez did his homework before doing this flick. There are so many terrifying sequences here, like the bike chase and the cabin break in scene (to name a couple) that got my heart racing to levels they haven’t risen too this last year!
What’s really great is Sanchez unlike the rest of found footage Bigfoot flicks doesn’t hide the monster, in fact you get a good look at him several times especially in the last five minutes or so. Sasquatch looks great too as he hired Peter Jackson’s Weta Workshop to design the look of the creature, I still though think Harry from Harry and the Hendersons is the best squatch put to the big screen (sorry Eduardo!). I think this one would’ve been ten times better had Sanchez skipped the “found footage” and just given us a straight up “movie”. But still definitley check this movie out it’s a ton of terrifying fun and will most likely please the hardcore Bigfoot fanatics as well!!
‘Late Phases’ Promises Old School Werewolves!!!
Great werewolf movies are pretty damn hard to come by these days but it looks like we finally have a winner coming our way soon! ‘Late Phases’ looks like a full on no BS old school werewolf movie just the way they were meant to be. The last truly great werewolf flick I saw was the incredible Dog Soldiers, which I can say without a doubt is one of the best werewolf movies of all time. The wait may be over though as Late Phases already looks like it’s got the genre by the horns, boasting incredible practical effects with a downright freaky ass looking werewolf!
The movie was written by Eric Stolz who also penned the impressive monster flick “Under the Bed” a couple years ago and directed by Adrian Garcia Bogliano who directed the creepy ass “Here Comes the Devil”. I am excited to see if this one can bring back the genre to the classic feel of movies like The Howling & An American Werewolf in London. The synopsis goes something like this:
“Crescent Bay is not the ideal place to spend one’s golden years, especially since the once-idyllic retirement community has been beset by a series of deadly animal attacks from the ominous forest surrounding it. When grizzled war veteran Ambrose McKinley (Nick Damici) is forced into moving there by his yuppie son Will (Ethan Embry), the residents immediately take offense to Ambrose’s abrasive personality. But that take-no-prisoners attitude may be just what Ambrose needs to survive as it becomes clear that the attacks are being caused by creatures that are neither animal nor man, and that the tight-knit community of Crescent Bay is hiding something truly sinister in its midst…”
Count me in! It’s been too long, I can’t stand anymore handsome CG werewolves!! Look for this one in limited theaters November 21st!
VHS Score: Richard Grieco Totally Ditches Summer School for Big Time Adventure!
I’ve been picking up a ton of VHS while out on the town doing while doing vintage shopping for my business here in Portland Oregon, that means that I’m watching a ton of awesome old flicks that have been somehow lost in the shuffle for years, at least for me! So the other night I decided to put on an interesting looking one called “If Looks Could Kill” way back from 1991, starring none other than fan fave from 21 Jumpstreet (the original series yo!) Richard “Booker” Grieco! Ol’ Grieco was destined for stardom when he exploded onto Jumpstreet & briefly rivaled Johnny Depp as the series heart throb. So Grieco quickly got some offers to make some movies-some bad and some good in a bad way. This particular film is pretty awesome, directed by William Dear hot off the success of the brilliant “Harry and The Hendersons”.
What we get here is a great obnoxious teen comedy (which I’m a big fan of, well, since I myself was a teen!) with a heavy dose of James Bond & equal parts Indiana Jones! What’s not to love there?! Dear clearly had a budget for this box office flop and it shows as it rarely skimps on cool set pieces and rather impressive action sequences. The flick was panned by critics, but like me, Roger Ebert got it and awarded the film 3 out of 4 stars. The plot’s simple, Grieco is a high school student flunking out of his french class while too busy boozin’ it up and slackin’ off. Now before I continue I have to ad that Grieco is clearly no teenager, nope- he’s got a serious dark ass five o’clock shadow the entire movie and the body of an olympic athlete, truth be told that in 1991 he was nearly 2y years old, though to me he looks more like 37!
Anyway because he flunks French he’s forced to…get this….go France for summer school!! Boo hoo what a life huh? Fail and get a free trip to France? Yeah right!! So that’s where things get crazy, as he’s quickly mistaken for a secret agent bearing the same name as his and begins an adventure of his own! Mistaken identity never felt so good. He’s almost tempted to reveal that he’s simply a high school student until the British Gov’t gives him a Ferrari to roll around in, so then at that point he decides it’s totally like worth playing along! Duh!
This begins a zany chain of events that involves Grieco playing his teenage luck with deadly sexy secret agent ladies, explosive chewing gum, wall walkin’ suction cup LA Gear sneakers, killer scorpions and a dastardly villain with a robotic Terminator style hand. It’s pure camp gold and a entertains with quite an impressive finale with Grieco trapped in an Indiana Jones style deadly villain castle hide out! So if you’re looking for a fun flick to watch with friends and a few beers check this one out-it should have made ol’ Grieco a star like Depp! Oh well!!
‘Shout! Factory’ Rules My 80’s VHS Nostalgia!!
There are movies way back from when I was a kid that I never thought would see the light of day on dvd. I’ve fond memories of going to the video store (back in the 1980’s when everything was VHS or Beta!) on the weekend and picking out movies with my friends on our parents video store cards. Mostly what I remember most are the amazing VHS box cover art from the 1980’s and how excited I was to get back home and watch the movies! We had to be sneaky around our parents because a lot of these movies they would’ve never allowed us to watch. It’s funny to, looking back because most of these movies we were sneaking around with were incredibly cheezy horror, action or sci-fi flicks that most people today think are nothing more than laughable cinema. To us though that shit was fully legit!
So years have passed and many of those flicks have been forgotten right? WRONG!! Thanks to Shout! Factory we are getting a LOT of those classic movies released now on DVD! I recently had some extra money to blow and found two movies I’d thought would remain on VHS only forever. However not only did they have them both on DVD but they also came with three other movies each that I have never seen before, but fondly remember their cover art from back in the 1980’s!! First up is one of my faves as kid, The Eliminators!
This movie was featured a couple times at our Bad Movie Nights we have here in Pdx and it delivers the goods above and beyond every damn time! If you are looking for the ultimate movie to get wasted with your friends and laugh (and love at the same time) this is IT!
The DVD of this one also includes three other movies which I have never seen, “Arena” from 1989, America 3000 from 1986 & The Time Guardian from 1989. So for a mere $9.99 you’ve got quite an exciting quadruple feature!!
Second I found that they released “The Dungeonmaster” from 1985 which was also one of my all time favorite movies as a kid. Being eleven years old and seeing this one for the first time back then was a real treat. The movie is downright ridiculous but it’s jammed to the brim with stop motion monsters, puppets, animatronics, crazy action, adventure, Richard Moll in a cloak & a rock and roll battle against the heavy metal band W.A.S.P.!
This one should really be viewed as a double feature with Eliminators but the DVD also features 3 other flicks two of which I have never seen before! “Cellar Dweller” from 1988 which is a pretty cool little monster flick, “Catacombs” and “Contamination 7” from 1993. So if you love those old video store movies of the 1980’s as much as I do but don’t have a VHS player or access to these on video do yourself a favor and spend some time exploring the Shout! Factory website!
Aragorn Get’s Life in ‘PRISON’!
The totally awesome and long forgotten “Prison” from 1988 has finally gotten a proper DVD release! This little gem of a movie is a real 80’s treat jam packed with cool effects, gore and some great actors to boot! Viggo “Lord of the Rings” Mortensen stars in this supernatural horror romp as a prisoner ordered to knock down a wall to an execution room where a former convict died for a crime he didn’t commit. Well as you can imagine this releases his angry spirit into a path of pure mayhem throughout the prison walls. Apparently this movie features real ex-cons too adding to it’s “realism”.
It’s been a long time since i have seen this flick but I am sure as hell looking forward to revisiting it! This one was directed by Renny Harlin who is also responsible for movies like ‘Die Hard 2’, ‘Nightmare on Elm St 4: The Dreammaster’, ‘The Adventures of Ford Fairlane’ (uggh remember that one with The Dice Man?) and that terrible prequel from the Exorcist from 2004 just to name a few. But all that aside, check out the trailer and look for it as it was released Feb. 19th on Blu-Ray/DVD via Shout Factory.
Nukie Nuked My Brain!
Saturday night I had the pleasure of watching NUKIE a little known shiny turd of a film from 1988! It was jam packed with crap! It followed the story of an annoying pair of aliens who crash land on earth, one in Africa and one in America. It’s supposed to be like some sort of hybrid of E.T. and Close Encounters except just really ultra suck-tas-tic in about every way imaginable!
This movie tries pretty hard to be cutesy and have a lot to say but in reality it’s just an excuse to use and animatronic alien head for two hours! Yeah that’s pretty much all this one has got ‘going’ for it and once the semi decent Nukie puppet alien face charm wears off you’ll be wondering how the hell this pile of dung ever got funded! This movie is full of weird stereotypes as well.
Nukie our main alien character runs around the African fields with his runny nose and befriends a pair of local tribal boys. There he does weird dances for them, asks random giraffes if he’s in America, irritates locals, transforms into blue glowing orbs and hijacks a helicopter with a monkey in a diaper. Yes this movie also features a weird ass super fucking annoying talking chimp who of course wears human clothes.
When he first appeared on screen and started mouthing off his incredibly irritating dialogue I had to restrain myself from getting off the couch and throwing my friend’s television out the damn second story window! From what my Nukie-fried brain can remember there wasn’t a single reason why this chimp could or should have the ability to speak english. Perhaps just being in the presence of Nukie gave him the superhuman ability to become one of the most annoying talking animals I have ever seen on screen. Later that night I had repeated dreams about washing that chimps mouth out with a bar of poison soap! Yep he makes the movie worthwhile alone!
That’s not all though, Nukie’s twin buddy Niko hangs out at this super boring NASA base, and every time they cut to the NASA scenes the movie suddenly sounds like the opening narration to an episiode of Dragnet! Yeah and boy do they love to show the same view of the NASA building over and over and over. There though Nukie’s buddy is experimented on by super lame scientists that hang out around a super computer that essentially does nothing but spit out useless information and weird ass dance music.
The rest of the movie is kind of a blur, but Nukie and Niko finally meet up and escape and guess what? They actually take the talking chimp along with them! I mean these two aliens have got to be suffering from severe nuclear brain damage to do a thing like that? If only we could get a sequel that followed these three idiots around for another 2 hours! Beware of this films it sucks bad and MUST be watched!!!
Universal Dork 