Universal Dork
The Most Unsuccessful Blog on the 'Net Since 2009!
recent posts
- He-Man 1987 Vs. He-Man 2026: Who’s got the Real POWER and the Most Muscle?!
- The Female EVIL DEAD: ‘Dangerous Seductress’ from 1992 Kills Boners!!
- Human Organ Traffickers vs Drunk Geriatric Cowboys?! The Absurdity of BO.R.N. (1988)!
- HELLBOY Battles MUTANT Baboons on a Desert Island in PRIMAL FORCE (1999)!
- Hare KRISHNA vs EVIL DEAD in 80’s Hong Kong?!
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Category: Epic Battles
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Today we talk about dvd hunting at thrift store in the Northwoods of Wisconsin and watching weird-O films found there with your mom! Yes a random “in the wild find” PRIMAL FORCE from 1999 is a forgotten monster movie starring resident bad ass Ron Perlman in an oddly similar Hellboy style role battling mutant baboons…
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Insane monkeys were all the rage (sorta) way back in the 1980s and now in the first rad horror film of 2026: PRIMATE & they’re more bananas than EVER! This practical fx extravaganza mops the bloody floor with CGI chimpanzees and brings some true bite back to the mini-maniac monkey genre of the golden age…
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Here’s a recommendation for all you goons out there looking for something stupid to watch this year on Christmas that’s sure to displease the merry masses: 2003’s ‘A LIGHT IN THE FOREST’ this utterly forgotten weird-o Christmas flick from the FX mastermind John Carl Buechler isn’t remembered for a reason-if you love bizarre yuletide films…
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Today we cover on of the best but almost never talked about alien abduction films: ALTERED from 2006! Blair Witch Project director Eduardo Sanchez crafted one of the most bonkers tales that pits a gang of numb nut hillbillies against a lone alien that THEY abduct! Filled with crazy gore and practical fx, ‘Altered’ deserves…
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What are the greatest wilderness survival flicks of ALL time? I say it’s two relatively forgotten films: SURVIVAL QUEST from 1988 & SURVIVING THE GAME from 1994! These two wild and nasty outdoor fights for survival bring the goods and them some during a time of cinema that looks risks and still felt mysterious &…
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Today we talk about the “treasures” of the Goodwill Bins: that being ‘FUTURE WAR’ from 1997 a movie so stupid and genius at the same time it must be studied by cinema scholars for years to come. Jean Claude Van Damme rip off, Daniel Berhardt, kicks major Dinosaur booty and goes toe to toe against…
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Today we cover one the coolest 1980s Aussie films around that deserves WAY more praise here in the the USA! Yeah- the relatively forgotten genre mash up, FORTRESS from 1985, hits ALL the right beats and features the beautiful Rachel Ward in one of the her finest roles. Part action, part adventure, part kids in…
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Hey I’m back again with a brand spankin’ new review of the creature feature extravaganza ‘WEREWOLVES’ in theaters right now! Are you a fan of films like The Howling, Dog Soldiers, Full Eclipse or even Predator: 2?! If so I think you’re probably gonna dig ‘Werewolves’ just as much as I did! Practical werewolves brought…
Universal Dork 