Tagged: Horror

The EXORCIST Franchise: What’s The Next Move & Does Anyone Care?

So just recently I rewatched The Exorcist III, which IMO is the perfect sequel to the original not to mention that its directed AND written by William Peter Blatty the creator/author of the original book. So to me the Exorcist story really ends with the 1990 sequel which should have just been the Exorcist II in my opinion. If you’ve still not seen the third installment of the movie I highly suggest picking up the blu ray that was released recently. It’s going to give you far more enjoyment than anything David Gordon Green can do with the dying franchise. Speaking of ‘ The Exorcist: Believer’, the other night I finally decided to check It out as I noticed it was streaming on Amazon Prime. I’d recently had a few people actually recommend THAT movie to me and said it was actually awesome. So I decided reluctantly to take the plunge. Unfortunately I’m gonna have to go with the popular opinion on the film: it was indeed sucked. For a franchise that they spent 400 million dollars on, giving the director of ‘Halloween Ends’ and ‘The Pineapple Express’ the keys to The Exorcist was just a major blunder.

‘Believer’ was like a bland two hour streaming show. It was serviceable, very generic and it was indeed Exorcist “content”. It was timid, slightly boring, uninspired and not the least bit shocking. We got two little possessed  girls, instead of one (WOW!!!). One of them even looked like Regan. I can’t remember too much of anything about it a few days later but I can remember the shocking scenes from the original AND part III. The Exorcist: Believer is a watered down, spade and neutered version of a true sequel.

It’s yet another “who cares” version of a rocky retro horror franchise with a bad extended track record already, that’s gotten even more tired over the years. What sort of new “exorcism” story would anyone  really care about? I think Linda Blair would be a good start, giving her a real role rather than a lame cameo might be the best way to go here. Keeping David Gordon Green away from the project too is a really good idea & I don’t think that anymore wants a yet another retread of the first movie. 

Looking back what made The Exorcist III work so well (even though at the time it wasn’t a huge box office success) is that it had its own unique story going on and felt very removed from the first movie while still maintaining a common thread of connection from Blatty’s novel ‘Legion’.  Honestly regarding The Exorcist new franchise, they completely blew it with that last movie and at this point trying to come up with some sort of “sequel” to THAT story would be one of the worst ideas possible-no one gives a shit about that story continuing. I’d say you’ve got to get Linda Blair back in the role of Regan, give her a very compelling role and then be willing to let her star in a film that pushes the boundaries in a shocking new way like the original had done when people saw it for the first time. What if for example there was a “mass possession” phenomenon occurring in the world and it was getting worse? Linda Blair could be a hero in the film OR it’s main protagonist as perhaps she’s the catalyst-becoming possessed and unchecked-what would that look like if an Exorcist didn’t get to her early on? Anyway, the only problem is with all of these committees and studio executives that know nothing about what people really want, they would likely never allow that to happen anymore. Too many bad cooks in the kitchen it seems today.

Something with the wildly controversial content of the first film would never be allowed to be made in a major studio these days. So unless the next installment of The Exorcist franchise is ready to go the ultimate distance and shock audiences with a fresh new vision involving original star Linda Blair, then I’d say they should really just shelve this thing for another decade. ‘Believer’ was obviously NEVER going to be anywhere close to the original or Exorcist III & I don’t think they’ve got what it takes to make a sequel on the level of  Friedkin/Blatty’s original material. I say let the Exorcist DIE but $400,000,000 obviously says we’ll be getting more of this bull shit whether we like it or not….

Comic Cover of the Week: Marvel’s Strange Tales of Vintage Voodoo!

Hey I’m probably the only one here who was a fan of one of Marvel Comic’s weirdest heroes: Brother Voodoo! I’m not quite sure if this hero is even a thing today, I’m sure he’s considered a racial stereotype, but I’ve always viewed him as the black Doctor Strange & always thought he was a great offbeat character more centered in the Marvel’s horror stories. More likely to be seen with Man-Thing than say Captain America, so I’ve always seen a lot of potential for him to be a break out star, especially now when the internet is so focused on identity and race. They could bypass The whole alias of Brother Voodoo as he’s got a pretty great real name, Jericho Drumm.

Here’s a cool vintage Brother Voodoo cover, the first one is a more modern makeover from Bruce Timm and the second is the original. If I was still a fan of the current Marvel stuff or the MCU (which I gave up on totally) I’d say he’s got true potential in 2024!! OG cover from John Romita way back from 1973!

Terror at the Hong Kong MALL! 1986’s ABRACADABRA & Supernatural Retail Mayhem!

I just busted out another video on the U-Dork YouTube channel, I’m not talking about Disney Star Wars or the latest Ghostbusters movie. Nope I’m going deep into Hong Kong Cinema to cover a really cool, super obscure supernatural adventure that takes place in 1986 in a mall! Abracadabra is a ton of fun and from the director of ‘Wicked City’ so you know it’s going to be blast.

I’d say this movie filled with ghouls, ghosts and a plethora of 80s fashion and nostalgia is ripe for the picking by the boutique blu ray labels for genuine release and a brand new rabid fan following. So we  talk “mall horror” and deep dive into the wild colorful world brought to you by Hong Kong cult director Peter Mak Tai-Kit. Check this one out and sub to the new channel!

 

 

Movie Melt Podcast: 1994’s Ridiculous Sexy Sea Monster Monster Flick-CREATURES FROM THE ABYSS!

Hey are you a fan of bizarre Italian movies filmed in Florida? How about 90’s creature features where sex crazed fish monsters chase a bunch of moronic party animals around a yacht lost at sea? Well on the latest episode of the MOVIE MELT Podcast we cover a ridiculous monster movie made the insanely genius mind of Alvaro Passeri, a practical effects wizard who also crafted the incredibly weird Christmas fantasy ‘Fantastic Games’ that I reviewed right here.

Well this one has been a fave of mine actually since the red envelope dvd days of Netflix, Creatures From The Abyss AKA Plankton is a totally bonkers flick with some of the most jaw dropping character dialogue you’re likely to see from that era anytime soon. It’s also got some crazy ass monster action and totally disgusting practical fx sequences that make this a stand out sci-fi creature feature.

So there’s tons more in this episode we discuss-lots a cool movies you just got to be checking out, especially if you’re a fan of weird stuff like the movie do a deep dive on! So check out the latest episode for a wild voyage out at sea with a crew of the biggest morons to hit the silver screen in Creatures From The Abyss! HERE IS THE EPISODE!

EXCLUSIVE Interview: The Green Movie Lamp Conspiracy…..Uncovered?!!

We covered some of the wild conspiracy theories that have weaved their way online about the emerald green lamp in Hollywood productions. There’s been an outpouring of interest and questions about exactly what these objects mean in cinema, where they came from & why their seemingly everywhere even still today in movies and major streaming shows!

Well we have the proprietor of “The Green Lamp Conspiracy” instagram page on for a rare and exclusive interview into what he believes is the bizarre origin of an alien conspiracy in Hollywood dating back to the late 1800’s. Check out some of the bizarre theories brought to the table by “Mr. Green” and decide for yourself!

THE PRIMEVILS: Charles Band REVIVES the Lost 90’s Stop-Motion Creature Feature!

I’ve been thinking lately about the way movies used to be made, full of cool special fx that weren’t an obscene bloated smorgasbord of shiny mind numbing digital fluff. I miss me some hands on practical work like stop motion animation and God dammit I think Charles Band (Full Moon/Empire) is reviving that genre of movie making with the upcoming release of THE PRIMEVILS!! Check out the magic on screen here in this latest trailer:

Newly revived from a project that’s apparently had its roots in the late 1970s but officially beginning production back in 1994, it was sadly left incomplete after director and fx wizard David Allen became ill and passed away in 1999. 

Allen was a connoisseur and master of stop motion and practical effects, working on many projects in the Charles Band Full Moon/Empire Films universe. Apparently serious work was picked back up in 2018 by one of Allen’s protégés Chris Endicott and the movie has now been completed, finishing the storyline and adding new effects to complete the original footage to make a cohesive film that honors the vision of Allen’s original idea. The stop-motion fx work here is beautiful and this whole project looks to really be something truly special at least so far visually.

I wasn’t sure what to make of this trailer (except that it looked fucking rad) when I saw it for the first time a few days ago. I actually wondered if maybe someone had really brought back to this modern world of bloated digital effects a totally brand new movie packed with new old school stop-motion animation.  I guess that essentially what its is, but even better yet we get a glimpse back to a lost 90s movie and something that looks like a breath of fresh air in 2024. I had to mention this incredible looking movie here and I just can’t wait to see it on the big screen hopefully sometime in 2024. Fingers crossed this one is as fun and fresh as the trailer makes it look! Here’s another cool clip:

1993’s Kamen Rider Zo: Kicks MAJOR Monster Butt!!

If you’re like me and are totally obsessed with monsters then I’ve  got a great recommendation for you! 1993’s ‘KAMEN RIDER ZO’  Is a short & sweet, bizarre little super hero adventure that packs a monstrous punch to the gut. Clocking in at around 50 minutes, it wastes no time getting to the action and wild special effects sequences that are jam-packed into this little nasty nugget.

I must admit, I’m a bit of a newbie to this character and the fairly extensive lore behind him. Kamen Rider (aka Masked Rider) was established in the early 1970s and has several different iterations through the years. One thing is certain the character is an iconic Japanese superhero and his costume is obviously top notch-This 1993 film too is the perfect intro to the character and so up my alley with all of the crazy monster villains. A bit for me like ‘Guyver 2’ if it had all the clunky exposition trimmed.

That all being said, I’d heard that this was a great place to start and maybe one of the most inventive visually, as well as over the top, action-packed and violent than any of the other installments. Naturally I was thrilled to find out that the director Keita Amemiya is the same person who did one of my all time favorite Japanese action monster movies: ‘Zeiram’ from 1991 and another fave being 1988’s Cyber Ninja.

Also the effects artist being responsible for the totally bonkers fx of another absolute Hong Kong favorite gem of mine ‘The Peacock King’. With this fast paced little adventure you’re going to get all the frenetic action sequences and all of the cool practical fx mayhem jammed packed into “Terminator” style chase film. A group of creatures are hunting down a little boy and it’s up to Kamen Rider to stop them.

That’s all you really need to know, as the version I watched had pretty subpar subtitles & was a bit difficult to follow plot wise to say the least-but who cares! The flick, which was originally planned as a feature film was massively cut down from it’s original vision. That being said it’s almost ALL eye candy and for me it made the perfect warm up for my movie nite where the main even was the glorious 1995 film ‘Godzilla vs. Destroyah’. More on that first watch for me later.

It features some impressive monsters for tour badass grasshopper themed hero to pummel on, one being a sort of “predator” style creature as well as a totally bonkers spider/human hybrid freak with some dazzling stop-motion & also a grotesque bat-man who takes flight to cause everyone major headaches. It’s drenched in style and oozing with great atmosphere as well as a genuine cyberpunk style with dashes of straight up horror.

The fight scenes are quite cleverly choreographed too and the action sequences filled with fine detail are a marvel to behold. The sets and locations aren’t skimped on either, it’s all so colorful to soak in & the kind of film that when it ends you might feel a bit cheated (in a good way mind you) by its swift runtime and craving more monstrous mayhem in its wake.

Bear in mind too, ‘Kamen Rider: Zo’ is not really a kids film either-though there’s not a ton of “human blood” there’s a good amount of goopy monster carnage to relish in. Oh yeah and Kamen Rider cruises around on a rad motorcycle too, usually before he’s ready to beat on some creeps and the main character who plays the masked rider’s alter ego is quite the well dressed hunk!

I give high praises to this largely forgotten little film that probably should have a proper release here in the USA, I got a sweet dvd copy from Taiwan on eBay but you can also check it out on Youtube:

 

Movie Review: J.R. Bookwalter Returns with Gooey Horror Social Satire ‘SIDE EFFECTS MAY VARY’!

Lately I’ve been checking out a bunch of J.R. Bookwalter’s movies that I somehow missed out on over the years, films like ‘Ozone‘ and ‘Robot Ninja” (which I can’t wait to review) as well as recently hooking myself up for a rewatch with the blue ray of his bonafide cult jam- ‘The Dead Next Door‘!  But most interesting is that he’s just released a brand new film after a 20 plus year hiatus. His latest ‘Side Effects May Vary‘ is currently on tour. Yes the director himself has gone on the road to exclusively show this bizarre new film in select indie theaters only, well before it streams anywhere or has any other physical release other than an exclusive VHS (I need one of these!).

However I was able to check this nasty little nugget out early and soak up all the gory goo drenched shenanigans that ensue in this weird little adventure. Basically what we’ve got here going on is a fairly simple story, flashback a couple of years to the height of the latest pandemic when everyone was getting the covid vaccine like it’s a god damn McDonald’s hamburger! We have our main character a mild-mannered middle-aged man named GLENN ROLLINS (um yeah I love that obviously) who just doesn’t wanna get the jab despite pressure from his wife as well as currently being sick as a dog at home. Meanwhile we get a glimpse into what’s going on with the newest safest, state of the art Covid-19 vaccine that’s getting ready to hit the market. It’s set to safely treat the entire population of the planet. So deep inside a secret pharmaceutical research center that’s tucked away in the countryside, we witness a test subject get injected with an unknown substance that immediately causes some, shall we say, interesting reactions to say the least. It seems this new vax does indeed have some intriguing side effects and our main dude Glenn finally gives in to the mounting pressure. Essentially to satisfy his wife by “doing the right thing”, he reluctantly agrees to the latest, safest and MOST utterly effective, state of the art, yet totally experimental covid vaccine at a doctors appointment. This thing is supposedly gonna save the world from the sickness- so what’s the goddamn fuss about already – right?


Initially the thing makes him feel like a million bucks, but soon his normal boring life begins to drastically change – first off his wife immediately finds him more attractive (woohoo!) and feels the urge to get frisky with her hubby. There’s surprisingly plenty of gratuitous nudity here in Bookwalter’s latest (remember what that was back in the 1980s?!) to behold and that’s the first sign that I was seeing something that felt ripped from the “golden era of horror” but also cleverly grounded in modern times. Yeah, let’s be honest here you just don’t really see good nudity like this anymore in current films. There I said it! It was kind of a breath of fresh air as an avid 80s horror fanatic, especially seeing Brinke Stevens playing the nosey neighbor next door watching some genuinely shocking events go down eagerly with her binoculars. Yeah the scream queen who’d spent plenty of time in her “birthday suit” was now on the opposite end of the spectrum in a completely charming little role in this film.

Including her here was a treat  – 1988’s ‘Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama’ is a fave of mine & that reminds me I NEED to see the sequel! Ok though, from this point on things do get pretty perverse, but in that old school low budget, practical effects heavy way that I’ve really missed so damn much over the years. It’s really all quite charming. Not just all the fx work on display-but the general vibe of it. This one might even make a good double feature with something like ‘Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama’. It has that same sort of playfulness and disgusting charm.

Ok, well sadly for Glenn, he does develop a few “side effects” that sort of put the kibosh on his passionate sexy time session, at least for the moment. Confused and most likely humiliated by his sexual performance or lack there of, he races out into the city while his side effects do indeed “vary” in to the next level. This leaves him to encounter a zany cast of colorful characters along the way. He’s also develops a new hobby: SPOILERS: killing people! It’s quite obvious this safe and effective vaccine might’ve caused him a few more problems than the initial covid infection-but hey at least he’s not worried about relapsing with latest current strain I suppose?

Luckily the cops are on the case. One of his pals Jack, a former police officer, teams up with his old boss from the force. They quickly go on the move to find this heavily vaccinated freak of nature as he ventures deep into the night. So yeah, there’s lots to enjoy here not only as a horror film but also equally a social satire that puts a lot of our human behavior during the covid-19 pandemic under the lens of the microscope. The societal pressures to conform, big pharma propaganda, public paranoia, conspiracy theories & general trust in our Gov’t institutions are all addressed. But not in any sort of weird polarizing way. Instead Bookwalter lets the audience forget about the real world stresses of it all & just shows the whole damn thing play out in an entirely entertaining, absurd fashion. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a courageous effort of dark satirical commentary but it’s also really just a wild little old school splatter flick at heart. The kind of movie Romero might’ve even crafted if he’d still been alive today.

It also pleasantly breaks the usual tropes in sweet yet subtle manner, one of my favorites being the ex-cop character Jack and his boss Chief Tom Danvers. Their rather unique past on the force together, erupting with emotions tied to an intense night off the job at a holiday party is an interesting character study.  I love the way their interactions were handled in response to this unforgettable event at least for one of them. That being said as much as I enjoyed the film-the way it was shot looked maybe a little too crisp. Bare in mind I just recently watched Ozone & Robot Ninja, two bonafide 80’s & 90’s horror classics IMO. So coming into this one the look of it all was a bit shocking coming directly off his older work.

I love the grimy look of ‘shot on video’ stuff and the beauty of shooting a movie like ‘Robot Ninja’ on film. I know, it’s 2024, so to actually shoot on film is expensive and probably pretty annoying BUT Bookwalter fans I know personally really do crave the look of his earlier work. A small criticism, but if ‘Side Effects May Vary’ had been shot in a similar manner I think it’ve been that much more impactful to longtime fans of his productions.

At the end of the day though it’s most definitely a gory little horror character study for the modern times that really pushes the envelope, takes risks and dresses it all up in a bloody, slimy mess of old school oozing practical FX very reminiscent of Bookwalter’s cult classics. An absurd cautionary tale for the polarized pandemic era that we’re hopefully on the other side of-if you dig his earlier flicks check this out with a live audience – likely coming to the big screen in a city near YOU!


 

 

The MOVIE MELT Podcast Heads to 80s Hong Kong for the Ultimate Vengeance of ‘PROFILE IN ANGER’!

Check out the latest episode of MOVIE MELT where we travel again to Hong Kong this time in 1984 as we cover the over the top action revenge film PROFILE IN ANGER. This nasty little film packs a powerhouse punch & most definitely deserves a larger cult following and a whole lotta love from action movie fanatics who might have let this one slip under the radar. Hong Kong took action to the next level in ways that would make Sly & Arnold shiver inter boots! Things go completely off the rails in it’s explosive final act as we follow this twisting tale of bloody revenge in the way that only Hong Kong can deliver!

Being a huge fan of Hong Kong cult cinema, I think PROFILE IN ANGER is definitely a hidden gem that’s largely forgotten even by connoisseurs of the genre so here you’ll get the full scoop on all the juicy details that went into making this weird little flick. The episode’s also filled with more useless cinematic mayhem than your brain can humanly comprehend as well as another installment of “battle of the bands”! We also talk about some of the coolest damn movies that we think you might be missing out on again in the latest installment of  Movie Melt!

VHS VERDICT: 1989’s ‘KILLER’ is one HELL of a Wild Low Budget Thrill ride!!

I love it when I see a movie from the 80s that somehow fell through the cracks for me, especially one that delivers the gory goods as hard as 1989’s ‘KILLER!‘ from Tony Elwood!  I got a chance to check out the Electro Video/Lunchmeat VHS facilitated and boy was it a wild damn ride. Essentially more of a thriller than a “slasher” with a very slight “supernatural” edge, ‘Killer!’ is leaps and bounds better than so many similar genre movies with 50 times the budget. That’s what makes this film so damn charming and deserving of a much broader audience with fans of horror cult cinema. ‘Killer’ certainly doesn’t reinvent the wheel but everything it does, it does so well while retaining that 1980s nostalgia of regional films like J.R. Bookwalter’s ‘The Dead Next Door’ or Leif Jonker’s ‘Darkness: The Vampire Version’.

We get the simple story of a killer (Duke Ernsberger) on the loose in a small rural North Carolina community who’s completely deranged and determined to mutilate anyone who stands in his way of his vicious killing spree. Most of the success of it and how it plays out weighs heavily on the shoulders of the villain played quite convincingly by Ernsberger. He brings an intense, disturbing, believable ferocity to the screen that you normally don’t see in films with a budget this minuscule ($8,000). This guy slashes, shoots, rips and beats people down in grim and intense ways and gives no fucks doing so. The practical effects on display here are wickedly bloody & actually pretty believable which really adds to the movie’s punch as it moves at a brisk tense pace and by the third act erupts into total high stakes mayhem.

Somehow this weird little indie film reaches rises to genuinely terrifying levels of horror in its third act when “SPOILERS”: the killer reveals himself as not only a cannibal but delivers one of the most terrifying monologs I’ve maybe ever heard from a horror movie antagonist. The scene is more disturbing than any of the gory deaths that precede it, with only dialogue. It’s incredible how well cleverly constructed writing like this can massively change the vibe of a horror film, transforming into an entirely different beast altogether. The killer plays ‘Russian roulette’ in front of his (soon to be dinner) victim he’s held captive, revealing that no matter how many times he pulls the trigger it will NEVER fire the bullet into his skull. But you might expect this to be some crazy parlor trick, he uses the same gun to suddenly deliver a stunning shot at his captives hopeful rescuers who’re making an attempt to foil his horrific plans.

In the film’s finale it’s anyones guess who’s gonna live or die. As terrifying as this man is, it’s amusing actually how susceptible to pain he is as he wines and squeal while taking a damn beating. Not quite the Michael Meyers type, which is refreshing but leaves the viewer pondering if he’s indeed being guided by evil supernatural forces or merely a delusional defeatable human on a lucky rampage. I give high praises to KILLER and was pretty blown away with it’s effective horror, mystery and action on display. It’s gotten a blu ray release from Terror Vision-so if this sounds like fun to you check it OUT!