Shane Black’s ‘The Predator’ Won’t Feature Arnold? I Don’t Buy It!

It’s been “revealed” recently that Shane Black’s ‘The Predator’ set for a 2018 release will NOT feature the return of Arnold Schwarzengger’s iconic character ‘Dutch’ from the original (and by far best Predator flick of them all). Apparently Mr. Black who actually starred along side Arnold in the 1987 movie met with him and the two couldn’t agree on the right role for his character Dutch to play in the upcoming blockbuster. This what Arnie recently had to say about it:

“They asked me, and I read it, and I didn’t like it — whatever they offered, So I’m not going to do that, no. Except if there’s a chance that they rewrite it, or make it a more significant role. But the way it is now, no, I won’t do that.”

So Predator fans all over seem a bit bummed about the news. Black had basically gone on record saying this installment of the franchise was going to feel like a big mysterious event for all the fans rather than just another throwaway Predator installment to make a few bucks. He’s stated: It would be an”inventive sequel” to the 1987 movie and not a remake. “Why start over, when you’ve all this rich mythology yet to mine? I like the idea of expanding and exploring the existing Predator mythology, rather than hitting the restart button.” He’s also said he was resisting the urges to use CGI and keep it in line with the original’s spectacular practical effects. From what I understand he’s kinda going for a “Force Awakens” of the franchise and I just don’t see how you can really do that with Arnold involved.

So I’m throwing it out there that I think Arnold’s statement is pure BS to throw the fans off. I bet he’ll indeed be included to the cast, but as it stood it sounded like Shane wanted Dutch to appear at the end of the movie in a way similar to how Luke Skywalker appeared in the Force Awakens. So let’s consider this though, Arnold is 69 years old, though he still looks great, if he’s gonna appear in a Predator movie it better be fucking soon! To make a great sequel to the ORIGINAL movie you absolutely need Dutch, one of the only people on earth to survive an actual confrontation with the alien killing machine. I’m sure Black knows this and I just can’t imagine he wouldn’t include the character in this next movie. Arnold be the ideal addition to a team of mercenaries who try and fail to kill the creature, who then seek him out to lead the mission. Wouldn’t the cast seen in the picture below be 100 times more epic if Arnold was included?

He certainly can’t go hand to hand against a Predator when he’s nearly 70 years old but he could still get in on the action with a big ass gun and help the team in their fight, employing his knowledge & some tricks he used against them back in ’87. It’d be amazing and the only thing that’d make this sequel even better was if they also added Danny Glover from ‘Predator 2’ to the cast as well. The two of them could lead the team in their final confrontation in this installment. Again, Shane Black must know that the rich mythology and classic characters returning in “The Force Awakens” was a huge part of what made the movie a bonafide blockbuster for all ages. I realize neither Glover or Arnold have the box office draw that they did back in the 80’s, hey neither did Mark Hamill until you linked him to the Star Wars franchise. What better surprise for fans for Dutch to appear in the movie mid way through?

So now I’ve recently heard that ‘The Predator’ has been pushed back from a Feb 2018 release all the way to August 2018. Hmmm…perhaps Shane is actually reworking the script to include Arnold in a bigger role? I’m completely willing to bet this is the case. I don’t have much faith in the idea that we’ll be seeing Danny Glover appear, though it’d be absolutely amazing for the die hard fans. However I just don’t believe Shane’s gonna let a direct sequel to Predator hit the theaters without Dutch. It’d be a huge mistake. He wants this one to be epic for all Predator fans and you simply can’t do it without Arnold. The Terminator franchise more recently rammed Arnold in as a Terminator and it felt forced as fuck. Arnie again as ‘Dutch’ however feels completely natural and essential for a true Predator sequel. What do you think? You think we’ll be seeing Arnold in the next Predator or has my fanboy fantasy warped my mind? 

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Comic Review: ‘There’s Nothing There’ #1 is Seriously Strange & Sexy!

Here’s a cool solid debut comic book from Black Mask Studios called ‘There’s Nothing There’ from the co-creator Patrick Kindlon of the awesome series “We Can Never Go Home”. This issue starts off instantly with a cool but familiar feeling set up as we follow a woman named Reno who attends a mysterious elite costume party with one of her friends. Think a little ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ here as soon it’s revealed that things are set to get kinky real quick.

We’re not entirely sure who’s party this is or what’s at stake as we’re introduced to some mega richie rich ‘Bill Clinton’ looking dude who emerges and delivers an odd slightly religious sexually charged speech to the party goers that seems to signify they’ll be creating something important together. The place quickly erupts in a full on orgy, and Reno fully partakes in the festivities as we’re given a fairly detailed look at the sexual endeavors that ensue over a few pages. During it all Reno sees something strange appear outside in the sky that at first appear almost like some sort of UFO’s floating in a pink cloud shrouding the sky.

The next morning Reno’s mind is clearly in a bit of a haze and as she meets a friend for breakfast we discover she’s some sort of star who’s worried about the paparazzi following her and not following her at the same time. She soon begins to have hallucinations of odd people appearing on the streets and we’re not quite sure if she’s suffering from the effects of drugs from the night before or if perhaps she’s developed some sort of sixth sense to see dead people. Is this the result of an elite ritual from night before? Likely, but things continue on this way even after she returns home to get some rest.

There’s some great potential here and has set up a mysterious plot that could easily go in any number of directions and I hope it pushes the envelope as the story progresses into some unfamiliar terrifying territory. We’re treated as well to some pretty sweet stylized artwork here from Maria LLovet that works perfectly with the story’s tone & mysterious set up. I’m not always these days drawn to stories about rich sexy elites as it seems that most characters in comics somehow come from this sort of classist privileged environment. However, I’m getting the feeling that this might deliver a lot of twists and turns that will likely place our main characters into some unfamiliar territory.

Black Mask is putting out cool books and is quickly becoming one of my favorite publishers. ‘There’s Nothing There’ #1 is a solid debut (that’s new on the shelves this week) and it’ll be interesting to see if this one can craft an unpredictable mystery as the series continues. Check it out!

The All Time Greatest One Shot Comics: X-Men #205!

Over the years we all have enjoyed and sometimes hated the giant “epic” multi title crossovers and mini-series that are so damn popular these days. However some of my personal favorite comic book stories are short and sweet. They often times have nothing to do with the major story arc you’re currently reading in that title and especially back in the 70’s & 80’s these self contained stories that had a beginning and end to them all in one book were sometimes more heavy hitting than any crossover could ever be. So I’ll be showcasing some of my favorites and the first one that came to mind might be my favorite of them all.

Flash back to 1986 when X-Men #205 hit the shelves. This issue is easily one of the best Wolverine stories of all time, and it’s all in just one issue. A brilliant epic crafted by Chris Claremont and Barry Windsor Smith remains one of the darkest and most brutal issues of X-men to date. Let me clarify that this was during a time when Wolverine was rarely seen in solo adventures and the character was still deeply mysterious.

The story was called “Wounded Wolf” and featured Lady Deathstrike’s first appearance as a super freaky ass cyborg as well as her three Reaver mercenary minions. It also featured Katie Powers from the mutant kid team ‘Power Pack’ who during a snow storm encounters Wolverine who’s beaten to a pulp, covered in blood and nearly naked. Soon the two of them are both on the run from Lady Deathstrike and her cyborgs who’re out for bloody revenge. It reminds of a Wolverine movie storyboard Ridley Scott might have anticipated directing in the 80’s.  Continue reading

The ‘Bubba Ho-Tep’ Prequel Is On The Way! Will Bruce Campbell Return?

‘Bubba Ho-tep’ is easily one of my favorite movies and one of, if not Bruce Campbell’s best performance of his career. It’s also helmed by the legendary ‘Phantasm’ franchise’s creator Don Coscarelli and the two make an incredibly awesome combo together. So now there’s word that Joe Lansdale who wrote Bubba Ho-tep in novella form way back in 1994 has finished writing the prequel ‘Bubba and the Cosmic Blood Suckers’ a book that will be available this coming October from Subterranean Press. This is exciting news for fans of the novella and also for fans of Bruce Campbell & the movie.

For years there’s been talk of Don Coscarelli doing another “Bubba” movie, it even had a working title, ‘Bubba Nosferatu: The Curse of the She-Vampires’. This as awesome as it sounded however never came to be, though Coscarelli was totally down to make it Bruce Campbell refused to do another film unless Joe R. Lansdale wrote it. This led to rumors of Bruce being replaced by Ron Perlman which would have been pretty cool as well. That never came to be either dammit! Well now it seems the right ingredients have arrived as Lansdale’s book could lay the groundwork for us to finally see the sequel/prequel to the 2002 cult hit.

Bruce played an elderly Elvis in Bubba Ho-tep & could easily now step into the role of the younger middle aged character seamlessly for the prequel. I’m thinking that the possibility of seeing this one materialize on the big screen is pretty damn strong. Check out the synopsis here, this book sounds pretty fucking awesome and a movie version of this helmed once again by Don Coscarelli would be the icing on the cake:

“Part of a secret government organization designed to protect civilians, Elvis Presley and a handful of hardcore warriors set out to save the world from an invasion of hive-minded, shape-shifting vampire-like creatures from a dark dimension who have taken up residence in a New Orleans junkyard.  

Besides Elvis, among these righteous warriors is a hammer-wielding descendent of John Henry of railroad fame, a Blind Man who sees more than those with sight, Jack, a strategic wizard, and Elvis’s right hand man and journal writer, Johnny, all thrown in with Raven (real name Jenny) a female recruit who is also a budding pop star, and like Elvis, high on the charisma chart.    

Their leader is none other than Colonel Parker, Elvis’s cutthroat manager, and a warrior himself, directly in contact with President Nixon, or possibly one of his doubles.

It’s an unnerving peek into a secret world, and a possible delusion. It’s what happened before Elvis, aka Sebastian Haff, found himself in an East Texas rest home, mounted on a walker, fighting an Egyptian mummy and worrying about a growth on his pecker.

Strange monsters, wild fights, sex with a beautiful ghost, a drug-induced trip into another dimension, and all manner of mayhem ensue, along with a Mississippi riverboat ride on a giant paddle wheel, and of course, there will be 3D glasses, fried peanut butter and ’nanna sandwiches, and a few hard working zombies.

Bring the kids, but plug their ears and blindfold them. This is one wild and nasty ride to the dark side, but with laughter.”

Let’s get on Bruce Campbell & Don Coscarelli’s ass about making this a movie ASAP!

Movie Review: ‘The Void’ is a Total 80’s Throwback Nightmare!!

I was lucky enough to be able to check out the latest 1980’s throwback monster movie ‘The Void’ at the Hollywood Theater here in Portland Oregon last night. I’m pretty fucking stoked that I’m so close to one of the coolest theaters in the country that’s constantly giving us here alternatives to the huge Hollywood blockbusters continuously cranked out. If you’re ever in Portland I highly suggest checking out this place as it always has several incredibly unique events and movies happening there. But I digress, The Void was definitely a thrill to see on the big screen!

I’ve been waiting for this one for quite a while and right now it’s showing all across the country at select theaters. If you’re a fan of classic 1980’s horror flicks like ‘The Thing’, ‘Reanimator’ & ‘Hellraiser’ you’re in for quite a treat. ‘The Void’ captures the look and feel of films like these with ease, similarly creating an incredibly unsettling sense of dread throughout. Seeing it at the particular venue I did intensified the experience, along with the fact I smoked some pot (hey it’s legal here now so get off my back!) before and I felt a little bit like I was transported back to simpler times when horror flicks were at the peak of their charm. It’s story is pretty simple at it’s surface, taking place almost entirely inside a lonely hospital during a graveyard shift. We meet a group of people whose quiet night soon becomes a descent into total madness as the hospital becomes surrounded by a weird ass masked cult dressed in white robes with black triangles displayed upon their hoods. Continue reading

Movie Review: ‘Don’t Kill It’ – Dolph Lundgren The Demon Hunter!

I finally got a chance last night to check out the latest Mike Mendez (Big Ass Spider, The Gravedancers) ) horror movie starring none other than one of my fave 80’s action icons Mr. Dolph Lundgren! What we’ve got here is a pretty sweet lil’ horror / action hybrid that’s likely to please any fan of good ol’ Dolph. This one puts Jebidiah Woodley (Lundgren) front and center as grizzled demon hunter who strolls into a small town where a recent string of murders has got the folks in a panic. He tries to convince the local cops that something supernatural is afoot but of course they all just think he’s some crazy ass dude and end up locking him away for a night in jail. They soon figure out though Jebidiah ain’t all that crazy after all as they come face to face with a creepy possessed killer while he’s locked up. Lundgren is quickly freed and leads the police on a bit of a wild goose chase to find the pesky demonic killer.

It’s a nice simple plot, short and sweet. The movie’s barely 80 minutes long but packs a fair amount of excitingly gruesome scenes into it’s short run time. ‘Don’t kill It’ is a damn good time, it’s an old fashioned 80’s style movie that borrows a bit from the Denzel Washington/John Goodman horror thriller ‘Fallen’. Heck this one could almost be considered some sort of sequel despite the tonal differences of the two. Lundgren totally shines here and is utilized in exactly the way I hoped he’d be, more like an Ash type anti-hero who cracks his fair share of one liners while thoroughly kicking evil ass. He’s easily the best thing about this one and I’m already hoping that we see him return for a sequel that brings him into the fold of even more insane mayhem. The only real problem is that the movie maybe peaks a little to soon as it’s shining moment takes place about one third of the way through. A town hall meeting gone incredibly wrong becomes an insanely grotesque show of over the top action, comedy & gore. Continue reading

Is Marvel Comics Exploiting Diversity?

I’ve been seeing an increase  of stories recently online & on social media about Marvel Comics and it’s continuing sales slump. Most of the articles bring up the hot topic of diversity, some say that Marvel’s record low sales of their comics books are simply because of rising cover prices & lack of fresh new ideas for their characters. Others say that it’s directly due to it’s attempt at diversifying it’s star characters by changing their race, gender & sexual orientation. Most of their popular character’s titles have had a bit of a revamp lately, for instance Wolverine is now female, so is Thor, so is Iron Man, Cap is black, the Hulk is now Korean-American etc. etc. You get the point. Could these changes really be the reason why sales are down? Do people just simply hate diversity in the Marvel Comics titles?

I really doubt that it’s really that simple, though rising cover prices and lack of fresh ideas definitely doesn’t help their low sales. What I see personally happening is a bit of a trend within Marvel Comics that feels a bit insincere. I honestly don’t really mind that the traditional characters have been replaced but I do feel Marvel’s move to make all these changes to their most popular titles feels as if they’ve been exploiting diversity to make a quick buck. What I’m saying is that it feels like Marvel is just trying way too hard to be current on these topics rather than crafting interesting stories. I don’t believe you can simply take all of your money maker superhero titles, simply change their identities and expect them all to suddenly bring you boatloads of cash because you finally decided to make them more diverse. It’s just not that simple folks. Continue reading