Tagged: comic
Comic Book Cover of the Week: The Punisher Teamed Up With ARCHIE?!!
What the hell is up with this here? The Punisher met Archie way back in 1994? Yeah it’s true, this one shot 48 page epic featured The Punisher hunting down a drug dealer named “Red” whose hiding in Riverdale! Frank Castle goes undercover at Archie’s school as a Gym class teacher and mistakes Archie for the similarly looking villain. What a feat of comic book genius! Hunt this one down folks because this was long before Archie met KISS or came out in support of gay marriage! I don’t care what people say Archie was always a cutting edge dude! I’d rather see the Punisher team up with Archie rather than Eminem any damn day….
He’s a Super Freak! He’s Super Freaky Yow!!
‘John Dies at the End’ Leaves Me Unsatisfied…
I recently checked out ‘John Dies at the End’ a flick which I’ve been looking forward to for quite some time now via VOD the other night for a whopping $9.99 viewing price. I’ve read the non stop hype on this one for a while now and I’ve been pumped for it, especially as it’s coming from Don Coscarelli, one of my all time favorite horror directors. Don’s most well known for his Phantasm films and more recently Bubba Ho-tep which has become a full on modern day cult classic. ‘John’ had all the ingredients of another horror hit, we even get Paul Giamatti in a spporting role along with a wild and crazy story that plays something like Bill and Ted’s meets The Matrix meets Evil Dead. I was hoping deep down inside this’d play like a companion peice to Phantasm II, my favorite of his films. So my question is why did I find myself a bored while watching it? Maybe I didn’t “get it”? Was it too quirky? I’m not entirely sure what about this movie didn’t work for me. It’s based on a book by David Wong, and the premise of it surely sounds like a winner. Check it and this truly “more awesome than the movie itself” poster:
A new killer drug that promises an out-of-body experience with each hit has been circulating the party scene. On the street they call it Soy Sauce, and users drift across time and dimensions. But some who come back are no longer human. Suddenly a silent otherworldly invasion is underway, and mankind needs a hero. What it gets instead is John and David, a pair of college dropouts who can barely hold down jobs. Can these two stop the oncoming horror in time to save humanity? No. No, they can’t.
Now this certainly sounds like my kind of movie and it’s clear this was going to be a challenge to translate to film on a small budget. The acting was decent and Giamatti is always a pleasure to have on screen. However for me the two lead characters weren’t quite interesting enough and the movie just kinda rode this straight line with really nothing that leap out entirely at me to get my blood really pumping. The plot seemed a bit disjointed, confusing and the pacing seemed a bit off to me as well. The movie is basically our hero Dave is dicussing the unbelievable events that have transpired to a reporter (Giamatti) at a diner. His buddy John uses this new drug “soy sauce”, which is given to him by the most generic “jamaican guy” you’re likely to see onscreen and suddenly their worlds are turned upside down as they enter into a confusing quirky quest into other dimensions. For for me to really describe how the plot thickens would probably require me to be typing about this movie far, far longer than I’d like to be. But that’s not to say the movie doesn’t have some fun and unique moments within.
The special effects in this movie were well done for the most part, some decent but not incredible practical monster effects were employed. The scene with the freezer meat monster was probably my favorite use of them and is bound to be a memorable movie monster. The CG effects were a bit on the sub par side but passable and the action was kept at a slower moving pace than what I was hoping for. The movie has been described as “hilarious” but I’d say it was chuckle worthy at best. In the end I wish I had more to say about this one, at best for me upon first viewing it was a mediocre movie experience which left me less than a little less than satisfied. The more I think about it though I think it might be a movie that deserves a second viewing upon which I’m hoping the second time around I get it…..
Comic Book Cover of the Week: Daredevil Tightens The Noose…
Daredevil to me has always been Marvel’s answer to Batman. He’s a vigilante searching the streets at night for whatever scum may be lurking in the shadows. He’s also had some pretty dark story lines over the years and this particular comic book cover drawn by John Romita Jr. is about as dark as it gets. This particular issue follows Matt Murdock during his “nomadic” spree where he wanders around the city after burning his belongings. He stays in a small bed and breakfast and helps a married couple in need sever their ties with their criminal family. During this period we get a very dark Daredevil indeed. This cover is a fave of mine…
Brian Posehn Couldn’t Even Make Deadpool Funny!
I just got done reading the new Marvel Now! Deadpool issue number one. This issue was co-written by Brian Posehn, a move Marvel has made to truly show you just how “hilarious” Deadpool is as a character. Though the issue was a decent fun read I expected a lot more in the comedy department having Posehn attached to this. The thing is I really do like Deadpool! He’s got cool powers, the Weapon X connection, a rad costume however this guy just isn’t funny. I have never read an issue where Deadpool is actually funny.
More so I would say he’s one of those guys that think’s he’s a genius comic genius when in actuality you just want him to keep his trap shut! I know you know someone like this, they never quit either they just keep cracking “quirky” jokes that no one laughs at with the ferocity of the Energizer Bunny.
So that’s the guy Deadpool is to me. The annoying friend who doesn’t know when to quit. He’s not funny. He’s just irritating. For some reason I don’t think that’s the guy Marvel thinks Deadpool is though. Hell they even got the brilliant Posehn on his side and he still just comes across like a stale donut. Besides that fact that I just had to put out there, the new issue was a fun read overall with nice artwork by Tony Moore. It follows a story of ex Presidents of the USA who are brought back to life as evil zombie versions of themselves, plotting to take over the country. Naturally S.H.I.E.L.D. hires Deadpool to take them down. I will be around for issue number two just for my love of Posehn and Moore, however we’ll see if the laughs improve over time.
I have to ask you all am I crazy? Is Deadpool actually funny? Am I missing something? Is my sense of humor cracked? If he has ever been funny what issues showcase his comedic brilliance?
Owen Wilson as Nomad in Captain America 2?! Maybe!
Wow did you hear the big news today about Captain America 2?!! Oh My GOD!!! Holy Shit!!! It’s official true believers!! Cap has got directors!! Two Brothers!! Nope NOT The Wachowski Brothers! No the………….Russo Brothers?!! The who?!
Wait these guys must be like totally underground, let me guess they helmed some super bad ass action flick that only a handful of ultra comic hipsters have seen?! No? Wait…wait a second…they aren’t the Russo Brothers as in the directors of “You, Me and Dupree” are they?! No….wait…yeah?!
Hmmm…um ok then, well Marvel you know what? You SURE know how to get the Hype machine oiled up and moving on this one! Can we at the very least please have Owen Wilson play the slacker super hero Jack Monroe aka “Nomad” to show up to crash on Captain America’s couch like he did in the 1980’s?
“Captain America 2: You, Me, Dupree & Nomad” Come on at least give us that to look forward too! If it happens folks and it’s actually not a bad idea, you gotta say you heard it here first 😉
The Avengers: The Universal Dork’s Verdict!
Well folks here I am with the official scoop on The Avengers. I’m sure most have already either read how awesome this movie is or like me saw it yesterday on opening night!! Well I here by give it the Universal Dork stamped seal of approval! The Avengers delivered the goods more so than I expected. In this day and age I’m highly critical of most things Hollywood serves us up-because it’s usually a bunch of weak ass bullshit! Especially comic book movies these days, they usually kinda suck with the exception of The Dark Knight and if they don’t suck they are heavily flawed. However, put a director behind it who truly cares for the source material and you can get something incredibly mighty. This is the case with The Avengers. It could have been a complete disaster had nearly any other wack ass Hollywood hack director got their grimy little hands on it.
But alas, it was worth the wait for Joss Whedon’s vision. I really never doubted him but I was surprised when the movie exceeded my expectations. Streamlined with a simplistic story, within the first few minutes of the movie know you’re in for a treat. We’ve got a superhero sandwich here and Whedon knows how to serve it up fresh giving us quite possibly the best versions of all of these superheroes to hit the silver screen yet.
The first Iron Man movie was a heck of a good time, Norton’s Incredible Hulk proved to be a bit of a failed experiment the second time around with it’s cheap CG version of the green goliath and The Abomination, Iron Man 2 was instantly forgettable and unnecessary, Thor was passable but once again failed with bad CG, a rather stale lead and story, then finally we got Captain America which to me was the best of the bunch leading Iron Man perhaps only because of Cap’s incredibly interesting back story. The Avengers on the other hand doesn’t feel cheap or rushed. It’s exactly what you hoped it’d be and a little bit more.
We finally get us some Nick Fury in more than just thirty second cameos. Sam Jackson shines as the movie’s glue as he not only forms the team but also manages to get in on the action as well and show us why exactly he’s SHIELD’s main man. The rest of the crew were excellent as well and when they all finally appear together it feels much more special than anything marvel has ever done cinematically. It’s a riot to see them interact and argue like a bunch of unruly teenagers. The screen just doesn’t seem big enough for all of their “super” egos so when they do finally work as a team it’s well worth the trouble getting there.
The movie never tires, it’s jammed to the brim with action, humor and some great character development. Let’s face it you gotta have some humor when listening to Thor babble or look at Steve Rogers hanging around in his red white and blue duds all day. They are quite a funny bunch of misfits actually. With that all said I think it’s time to give my two cents worth on The Hulk. I never thought I’d say it but I am kinda glad Ed Norton decided to sit this one out. Mark Ruffalo was the best on screen movie Banner yet. He brings a sort of desperation to the film and looming sense of unease as we wait nearly up to the third act before we finally get to see the green guy in action. I think this time around they almost got the Hulk perfect too. Almost. He’s easily the most realistic and convincing Hulk we’ve seen on film. He looks leaps and bounds better than the Norton version, which I recently watched again and just couldn’t get past the wretched CG green giant. This Hulk at least feels like he’s got some weight on him, rather than some flimsy “Roger Rabbit” computer generated cartoon leaping on screen with real actors. You can tell Whedon wanted to get him right this time around. I can’t say it’s my dream “movie Hulk” as you can still tell he’s a purely CG creation but a guy has got to give up at some point, as I have given up and accept that Hollywood has a formula they are sticking to special effects wise and it’s just NOT going to change. So I accept this Hulk if only because of the comparison to my last two movie representations.
Lastly I would like to point out a few things I think could have been better. Though I thought that Loki was a sufficient villain he wasn’t a very interesting one. A bit on the bland side I personally would have rather seen Baron Zemo or The Red Skull return and put together a “Masters of Evil”, just villains that are a little more captivating and frightening. Loki being a bit of an on screen bore didn’t get much help either from the Whedon created Chitauri alien race and personally I would have liked to have seen more of them in the movie as I think they could have put a little more fear into us movie goers hearts as villains. I never really believed that Loki was all that hell bent on the mission at hand. In a second installment I’d love better villains-give us Mister Hyde, Goliath, The Wrecking Crew, Titania and The Absorbing Man!
My only real big problem with the film was actually the Chitauri in the final act of the film. This falls on the fact that our heroes were doing a lot of battle with them in the city and for some reason Whedon decided to CG them entirely. They were roughly the size of an average human so why not have real actors there playing them? It at times looked a bit funny seeing these real actors battling CG aliens in hand to hand combat. I don’t want to spend anymore time on this topic, but hey Joss, just so you know nothing is better than the real thing. If you don’t have to CG it don’t do it. Remember “I am Legend” with Will Smith? Nuff said….
The Avengers regardless exceeded my expectations and put a big smile on my face. Joss Whedon did it and once again it was well worth the wait. Now it’s just a question of what’s next?!
The New Hulk Series: Far From Incredible!
You all must know how disappointed I have been with the Incredible Hulk in the comics for the last few years, the Red Hulk, A-Bomb, The Incredible Hulks….Uggh! I just couldn’t stand it! So naturally I was pumped to have all of that bull shit wrapped up with the mess that was made of the Hulk over the years when I heard that Hulk was going to get a new writer and start over again at number one with Jason Aaron and Mark Silvestri on board. Now here we are at issue number four and I have got to say my attention is seriously faltering.
The concept seemed interesting enough, well sorta, Hulk and Banner have split into two different entities and are at odds with each other. Well too bad John Byrne already did this in his short but brilliant stint / story arc way back in the 80’s. But well we all know how original ideas are hard to come by now days…anyway what we have ended up with is a long haired bearded Hulk who lives in the crust of the earth with the mole men and a psychotic dick of man, Bruce Banner who lives on an the gamma Island of Doctor Moreau. Seriously borrowing a bit TOO much there from Moreau-it’s almost sickening. But hey what the hell right it’s the Hulk?
Well for some reason Banner is trying to turn into the Hulk again but it ain’t working and he’s become a mad man, sending his Doc Moreau clones after the real Hulk and pissing him off. So the Hulk decides to go after Banner once and for all…oh yeah the Hulk is intelligent again. How the hell is it determined these days if he’s a mindless monster, a child like brute or an intelligent bad ass? I have been confused for years about this all. Anyway Amanda Von Doom (no relation to Doctor Doom, apparently that’s a common last name?!) has gotten the Hulk to help her destroy Banner because her group of assassins takes down mad scientists exclusively. How convenient huh?
Now they head toward Gamma Banner Moreau island and get attacked by Hulk Sharks, Hulk bats, Hulk Tiger men ect. It’s a pretty weak story if you ask me…I almost prefer Abomb to this really. Then there’s a question of the art, I used to like Silvestri, but today his sketchy art reminds me more of slightly talented Rob Liefeld, I also don’t really dig the long haired handsome bearded “hunk” Hulk that is portrayed here-or for that matter the “old Hulk” they for some reason draw on the cover with his “foot ball player / meat head high top” bowl cut. To make matters worse they have got Whilce Portacio stepping in on issue #4 for some seriously crap-tas-tic artwork that’d make Liefield cringe in his Levi’s 501’s & Doc Martens. I think I just have to say it-the Hulk sucks again!!! How is that possible? Am I crazy Hulk fans?! Have I gone mad and this shit is actually brilliant?! I am hoping this story ends soon and a new writer and artist take it over….hey Mantlo, Stern, David, Jones, Byrne and Buscema rescue me from this ongoing Hulk Nightmare!!
It’s 1987: Trick or Treat! How about a Comic Book Instead?!
Way back in 1987 Marvel had an idea-let’s give kids comic books instead of candy on Halloween! Yeah back in those days people were super freaked out that Halloween candy was poisoned or that it had razor blades and needle s stuck in it. Whoever started that rumor has gotta be a major party pooper-I mean did anyone ever really get harmed by Halloween candy?! Well Marvel had the solution and one that really should have stuck-mini comic books instead! Hell I’d take an Incredible Hulk comic over a Baby Ruth any day!!! Check this out:
Well along with my mini comics I’ll gladly take one of these Hulk Trick or Treat candy or in this case comic book carriers from 1979!!
Hulk Say Goodbye to Greg Pak! Yippee!
I have got to say being a HUGE Incredible Hulk fan I have been missing him a in a big way the past couple years. Greg Pak who has spent a half decade on ol’ jade jaws is finally on his way out from the series….and I couldn’t be more thrilled! I was a big fan of his early Hulk stories like Planet Hulk and World War Hulk-awesome stuff! But the past couple years have been horrible, I have tried several times to get into The Incredible Hulks & Hulk (launched by Jeph Loeb) and I just could not do it folks. I am sooooo done with The Red Hulk, The Red She-Hulk, The Incredible Herc, A-bomb and the rest of those lame ass characters that these two titles have produced.
I just wanted the plain old green Hulk back!! Continue reading





















