Tagged: sequel
U-Dork Visits the Jungle SET of 1987’s PREDATOR?!
I headed down to Puerta Vallarta and realized that near by was the OG jungle set of one of the greatest action horror sci-fi film of ALL time, 1987’s PREDATOR!! So I got my camo on and headed straight into the jungle to check it out! Come join me as I visit the nostalgic location of one of Arnie’s best movies and talk about just why this 1987 film can NEVER be topped by these new sequels!!!
THE DEADLY SPAWN 2 Sequel That Never Was! Monster FX Mayhem!
Let’s talk about one of the BEST hidden gem creature features of the the 1980s, ‘METAMORPHOSIS: The Alien Factor’ which was originally filmed as the sequel to cult monster classic 1983’s THE DEADLY SPAWN! If you love goopy gory horror dripping with slime then you’ve gotta check this one out!! A “Trapped on VHS” gem that’s just waiting for it’s chance to get it’s tentacles on to a fancy new Blu Ray release!!
The BEST Craziest Episode of the 1980’s Twilight Zone: WILLIAM FRIEDKIN style!!
Today we’re talking’ some 1980s TV and we’re covering the scariest, craziest episode of the 1980s Twilight Zone directed by William “The Exorcist” Friedkin! This 80s incarnation of the the iconic anthology series just does NOT get enough love, in fact so many people seem to have forgotten it all together. Well we’ll discuss how it all came together after the highly controversial, tragic but iconic 1983 film and just how some of these installments of the 1980s series could’ve been used for a sequel film! Check it out!
Thanksgiving themed B-Movie TERRORs: Watch These Forgotten Gems This Holiday!!
It’s THANKSGIVING and you most likely need some totally RAD forgotten B-movie gems to check out on the big TURKEY day and of course Black Friday, if you’re gonna avoid the crowds why not watch some cool weird-o tales of terror that ALL in valve the holiday. Well I’ve got some cool pics compiled right here in my latest U-Dork YouTube vid (Have YOU subscribed yet?!) check it out right here and let me know your favorites for the Thanksgiving season!!
The EXORCIST Franchise: What’s The Next Move & Does Anyone Care?
So just recently I rewatched The Exorcist III, which IMO is the perfect sequel to the original not to mention that its directed AND written by William Peter Blatty the creator/author of the original book. So to me the Exorcist story really ends with the 1990 sequel which should have just been the Exorcist II in my opinion. If you’ve still not seen the third installment of the movie I highly suggest picking up the blu ray that was released recently. It’s going to give you far more enjoyment than anything David Gordon Green can do with the dying franchise. Speaking of ‘ The Exorcist: Believer’, the other night I finally decided to check It out as I noticed it was streaming on Amazon Prime. I’d recently had a few people actually recommend THAT movie to me and said it was actually awesome. So I decided reluctantly to take the plunge. Unfortunately I’m gonna have to go with the popular opinion on the film: it was indeed sucked. For a franchise that they spent 400 million dollars on, giving the director of ‘Halloween Ends’ and ‘The Pineapple Express’ the keys to The Exorcist was just a major blunder.
‘Believer’ was like a bland two hour streaming show. It was serviceable, very generic and it was indeed Exorcist “content”. It was timid, slightly boring, uninspired and not the least bit shocking. We got two little possessed girls, instead of one (WOW!!!). One of them even looked like Regan. I can’t remember too much of anything about it a few days later but I can remember the shocking scenes from the original AND part III. The Exorcist: Believer is a watered down, spade and neutered version of a true sequel.
It’s yet another “who cares” version of a rocky retro horror franchise with a bad extended track record already, that’s gotten even more tired over the years. What sort of new “exorcism” story would anyone really care about? I think Linda Blair would be a good start, giving her a real role rather than a lame cameo might be the best way to go here. Keeping David Gordon Green away from the project too is a really good idea & I don’t think that anymore wants a yet another retread of the first movie.
Looking back what made The Exorcist III work so well (even though at the time it wasn’t a huge box office success) is that it had its own unique story going on and felt very removed from the first movie while still maintaining a common thread of connection from Blatty’s novel ‘Legion’. Honestly regarding The Exorcist new franchise, they completely blew it with that last movie and at this point trying to come up with some sort of “sequel” to THAT story would be one of the worst ideas possible-no one gives a shit about that story continuing. I’d say you’ve got to get Linda Blair back in the role of Regan, give her a very compelling role and then be willing to let her star in a film that pushes the boundaries in a shocking new way like the original had done when people saw it for the first time. What if for example there was a “mass possession” phenomenon occurring in the world and it was getting worse? Linda Blair could be a hero in the film OR it’s main protagonist as perhaps she’s the catalyst-becoming possessed and unchecked-what would that look like if an Exorcist didn’t get to her early on? Anyway, the only problem is with all of these committees and studio executives that know nothing about what people really want, they would likely never allow that to happen anymore. Too many bad cooks in the kitchen it seems today.
Something with the wildly controversial content of the first film would never be allowed to be made in a major studio these days. So unless the next installment of The Exorcist franchise is ready to go the ultimate distance and shock audiences with a fresh new vision involving original star Linda Blair, then I’d say they should really just shelve this thing for another decade. ‘Believer’ was obviously NEVER going to be anywhere close to the original or Exorcist III & I don’t think they’ve got what it takes to make a sequel on the level of Friedkin/Blatty’s original material. I say let the Exorcist DIE but $400,000,000 obviously says we’ll be getting more of this bull shit whether we like it or not….
VHS Verdict: 1987’s ‘Order of the Black Eagle’ & the Return of Typhoon the Baboon!
I watched Order of the Black Eagle, a VHS that I was pretty pumped to see that’s currently stuck in “video only” limbo and is the sequel to 1986’s ‘Unmasking The Idol’. That one got a sweet Vinegar Syndrome blu ray release-that you just got to pick up if you’re looking for a total 80’s action banger. I was lucky enough to see the first installment here on the big screen in Portland, OR at the iconic Cinematic Theater with in a packed theater and boy was it a crowd pleaser! The star of the show is really the main character’s (a 007 style secret agent named “Duncan Jax”) animal sidekick, a Baboon named Typhoon, who’s got his own damn Letterboxd actor page! The lil guy kicks a LOT of ass in the first film. This of course is while he wears a tuxedo, does martial arts moves and flips people the bird whenever he gets the opportunity!
I HIGHLY recommend picking up that on blu ray-so I was naturally super stoked to find that the movie had a sequel from 1987! Made just a year later, so peeps must have been just as pumped as I was about this nifty little fully over the top adventure romp. Yes- Even more shenanigans from Duncan Jax AND of COURSE Typhoon the baboon. Sign me up! I’m a total sucker for 1980s adventure films jam packed with all the thing that make the era such a unique time for action filled with real explosions and crazy commandos.
Well I found it on VHS and threw up the projector and gave ‘Order of the Black Eagle’ an eager viewing. The rundown goes something like this: On a remote island, inside of a strange castle a gang of ambitious Neo nazi’s have an outrageous plan to revive Hitler from the dead. It’s up to Jax and his rag tag gang of super spies to infiltrate this evil clan and make sure Hitler stays dead forever! Now that’s some incentive huh?! He’s the ultimate evil looking a little waxy while still in suspended animation.
Well along the way we do get quite an adventure, full of explosions, lots of guns, jungles, babes, hunks, evil masterminds and over the top bastard henchmen. It’s pretty fun little dumb pulpy romp that unfortunately is a bit light on Typhoon the baboon and with his role significantly diminished in the second installment the film unfortunately begins to devolve into a generic rich white playboy secret agent man who simply doesn’t have the charm (or the script) of the real James Bond. Luckily he’s joined by a gang of gun crazy numb nuts the likes of this guy right here:
Typhoon was likely the main reason why ‘Unmasking the Idol’ felt SO special-no matter how many explosions you throw at us. Sure it’s still fun to see Hitler’s resurrection get foiled and Jax’s team of tough guys/gals (who barely get any character development) go to town on a huge nazi militia BUT what we really all came to actually see was the damn BABOON! And when he does appear the vibe obviously changes quickly as his charisma level is pretty much through the roof.
So what exactly was Typhoon doing most of the time here? Well even though he wasn’t on screen nearly as much as the last film-he still go plenty moments to flip people off (which never seems to get old) and also his big “highlight” comes when he jumps in a miniature primate sized tank(as seen in the above pic) and blows up a dozen Neo-nazis. So it’s still got a few entertaining chops under it’s sleeve but this time around most of the action involves Jax and his new band of misfit commandos-which is still a lot of fun to behold but still manages to be a bit bland at least in comparison to the first installment.
This also falls a bit into the “Indiana Jones rip-off” sub genre more this time, with lots of island jungle chases, river boating and shoddy cheap-o adventuring inside a castle temple that looks like it’s made out of cardboard. Count me in for anything from the era that strives to give us some “Indy action flavor”, It feels like I’m cutting this film down but it really does make for a fun midnight flick and I personally think Vinegar Syndrome should have released both films in a 2-pack.
This is in serious need of a new transfer as well as a some intense sound editing, the VHS version of the film’s dialogue is severely buried in the background noises and loud score. Overall ‘Order of the Black Eagle’ is a bit of a subpar sequel to a near perfect first installment-obviously it need more of Typhoon the baboon but had THIS been a stand-alone film I think it still would be deserving of a small but dedicated cult following. If you haven’t seen ‘Unmasking the Idol’ though you’re in for a real treat, just keep in mind that the sequel doesn’t really improve on much and it’s clear why a third film never materialized…
Monster Puppets, Magic & Mystery: ONYX The FORTUITOUS & The TALISMAN of SOULS
I went into ‘ONYX The FORTUITOUS & The TALISMAN of SOULS’ not knowing much of what to expect except that it apparently had Barbara Crampton and Jeffrey Combs in it, which I assumed would likely be small cameos. However this new horror comedy was a breath of fresh air and though it did only feature Crampton in a cameo, Combs was a major player here as the movie’s sinister villain. Better yet the film’s jam packed with some really sharp comedy, mainly from the film’s writer, director, editor and star of the film Andrew Bowser who plays the severely socially awkward character Marcus (but he prefers to be called Onyx the Fortuitous). Marcus lives with his mom, works at a fast-food burger joint and gets zero respect from anyone.
He’s quite a strange character who’s brand of humor is likely to divide audiences-luckily I thought he was pretty entertaining but I can see how he could be a bit too much for certain people to endure. Almost like fast talking “Napoleon Dynamite” whose mannerisms sorta have to be seen to be fully embraced. Apparently Andrew Bowser has been doing the character on Youtube for a while now and this is his feature film debut.
Anyway Marcus’ life has reached an all time low when it’s apparent he’s got no real friends or meaningful relationships that is until he wins a contest to a weekend stay at a creepy mansion hosted by his favorite online Satanic occult personality “Bartok the Great” and his sexy assistant Farrah. There he meets a cast off oddball characters who’ve also won this odd vacation opportunity. However they get much more than they bargained for when they realize all is not as it seems and there’s a much more sinister plan afoot that catapults them into bizarre mystery leaving them trapped inside the stronghold. The best thing about this weird little horror comedy are the uniquely ridiculous characters we follow. As Marcus, who convinces the rest of the crew to call him “Onyx” isn’t strange enough he’s joined by a solid supporting cast.
Jeffrey Combs delivers the goods here too, he’s not phoning it in and we all know when he’s on top of his game he’s a cinematic genius to behold. The film’s cast really pushes this one along at a brisk pace with plenty of heart and intrigue-but there’s more for old school horror fans. The special fx here also take center stage with some truly impressive creatures that are brought to life via some incredible puppetry and animatronics. This one would make even Jim Henson’s Creature Shop a bit jealous I think. Minimal CGI here is greatly appreciated and it shows just how special a production can feel when filled with creations that are actually on set.
That all being said I wish that they’d have gotten a bit more screen time, most of the stunning puppetry is contained to one key sequence. The trailer does make it look a little more fully loaded with monsters, still maybe less is more in this case and the movie might’ve benefitted more from the way it’s characters, at the end of the day, shine more than any crazy gore or bloodthirsty creatures. This one’s comedy which I think is pretty razor sharp for the most parts (aside from maybe getting a little too cutesy at the finale) is really the main attraction. But that doesn’t mean the film doesn’t look great-it’s got the spooky atmosphere nailed down but could’ve utilized the set pieces a bit more to really push the adventure to the next level. All in all though this one was a real delight and a bonafide vanity project from Andrew Bowser that’s bound to end up a modern day cult classic.
It’s got the FX, the humor, colorful characters, mystery, totally excellent puppet monsters and just the right amount of heart to give it some emotional weight. Check this one out if you’re looking for something a bit different-hopefully you’ll find Andrew’s character “Onyx” as hilarious as I did-that being said-you’ve been WARNED!!
DYLAN’S NEW NIGHTMARE: Freddy Krueger’s SORTA Back!!
Have you been hoping for Freddy Krueger to return in the same way that Michael Myers has in the latest “Halloween” trilogy? Me neither-But I’m always open to check out a sweet new fan film! From some director Cecil Laird and the same team who brought the excellent ‘Never Hike Alone’ (Friday The 13th) fan film has returned, adding a new chapter to the ‘New Nightmare’ chapter of ‘A Nightmare on Elm St’ franchise. I gave this a whirl the other night and was pretty impressed with this 34 minute short film.
We continue with Dylan, the son Heather Langencamp (Nancy) from Wes Craven’s ‘New Nightmare’, is now an aspiring actor trying to land a role in the next “Hatchet” film when his audition goes off the rails when Freddy shows back up to begin terrorizing him! To keep it extra authentic Miko Hughes returns in the role of Dylan, now all grown up and ready to face a newer nightmare. So this alone is a real treat that keeps the thread of terror grounded firmly in the franchise-a real nice touch. But what about the real star of the show, Mr. Freddy Krueger himself? Obviously we don’t get Robert England back, I’d for a moment hoped they’d have gotten him at the very least for the voice because Freddy here looks pretty great for the most part (his caved in sunken black eyes are a bit much tho). Dave McRae has some big boots to fill here and though he isn’t always the spitting image of the classic Freddy he does a decent enough job in the role, one that’s evident here, is near impossible to fill.
What we get though is a pretty ambitious little “new” chapter here that highly improves on the imperfections of the wretched remake from 2010. Freddy feels much more like his old self, armed with his campy one-liners with the vibe more in line with the original franchise, with a few moments of practical fx gore to chomp on. It looks pretty good for the most part, it does feel a little fan film-ish and maybe needed a few better locations and amped up dreamy atmosphere to real hit the point home for die hard Fred Heads. I also think this short film could’ve really benefitted from a more inventive sequence to end the film, one of the best things about Freddy in the movies are the totally memorable horror sequences, things like the roach motel, the pizza with the Freddy faces etc are a staple in the classic franchise-this could have based it’s somewhat lackluster “finale” instead on an more inventive horror sequence reminiscent of the classic franchise to really up the ante and quench that Elm Street thirst. Still it’s a neat little fan film that is worth a watch for the fans as we all obviously yearn for more Freddy.
I’d say it’s time for one final Englund Freddy flick. Though he’s recently stated he’s in no shape to reprise the role, he’s 75 and (thicker around the waist) I still think he could make it work as is. Perhaps it’s been too long in the dream realm and as Freddy’s been out of the psyche of all of the teens he once scared to death, he’s older, much less powerful now and slowly dying off, but he get’s one last chance perhaps being aided by some sort of dream demon apprentice who brings his power back and in turn is willing to continue on his legacy-there we could explore the actual lore that made Freddy into the legendary dream demon. A final showdown with him and his apprentice when Nancy realizes his power is returning-she must enter the dream realm to finish him off before he reaches full power.
Who knows “older Englund Freddy” could even possess Kevin Bacon (as a new character and rumored to have real interest in taking over the role) in the real world, transform him into the new version of Krueger-they could even utilize Robert’s voice when he’s possessed? Just ideas-but likely Hollywood just wants a new Freddy Krueger cast to try and make some $$$ rather than an inventive “one last hurrah”, working a story that caters to Robert Englund’s age. In the meantime though this is a good enough fan film to keep the spirit of Elm Street in the consciousness of teens of the modern age-If they could bring back Krueger there’s so many interesting modern tropes that Freddy could riff on-that being said it’s probably realistically time to leave the Elm Street legacy alone and let it age gracefully….
Check out Dylan’s New Nightmare to watch for free right HERE!
The Next Best Thing to The 1990 Practical FX TMNT!!?
Cowabunga dude!!! I’ve been saying it for years, they need to bring back the 1990’s practical fx Jim Henson Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!! Lets face the damn facts nothing they produced since has been very good or really anywhere close to what the fans want. I really haven’t been excited about the TMNT franchise since the first two films.
Having recently revisited the 1990 original it was more than apparent how well that movie had aged and how dark it really is in comparison to anything they’ve put out since. One of the best things about it was indeed the practical effects, but also the sets, choreography and real martial arts that were used to bring them to life on screen. We are now living in an age where no filmmaker seems to be ambitious enough to attempt to bring them back to life in the way that soooo many fans have wanted for so long. So what do you do when you’ve completely given up on the Turtles coming back in the way they did in that original film?
I guess you just wait for a CGI animated version of the characters that might still deliver that original spirit and oddly that’s exactly what we got in these new 2 pieces of test footage put together by John Likens. This is incredibly interesting, when I first viewed it I was a bit perplexed, at first glance I almost thought these were new practical fx Turtles! I was a bit disappointed to find they were created via CGI, of course, it’s 2023-no one would ever film the Turtles with their real suits. Still tho, this footage is wildly impressive, so much so that I just might be willing to give a TMNT film another real go, check this out and let me know if I’m crazy?!
Even though each of these 2 clips are only seconds song I can see the potential and as we’re never going to get real life actors playing the characters again this is clearly the best version of them I’ve seen since. Their look reminds me of the darker original comic books of the 80s blended with the 1990 cinematic TMNT.
I’d say give this guy a chance to work his magic, better yet how about a mix of practical fx Turtles AND cgi ala the magic of The original Jurassic Park?! I know it’d never happen Hollywood is clearly unable to wrap their head around filming real fx, with real stunts, clever real life choreography and real old school pyrotechnics. So this seems like the best we might get, but it also feels too much like something fans would like. These days it seems like Hollywood is unwilling to really give fans what they want. I’m not sure quite why? I’m excited to see the remaining Turtles get the test footage treatment regarless….
The True Sequel, ‘The Exorcist III’ Ignored By New Trilogy?!
Pleeeeez ‘Pineapple Express’ bros just stop trying to make modern sequels to the classic horror films!! Why has this disturbing trend continued after the dumb dumb Halloween rehash disaster?! Who decided that David Gordon Greene and Danny Mcbride are somehow the new John Carpenter and Clive Barker? This trend is a bit bizarre, I thought when they announced the Halloween “H40” trilogy which ignored all of the lore except for the first film that something strange was afoot. I mean Green and Mcbride were certain that their modern trilogy, which started off as a remake of H20 that erased that iconic 90s showdown, was actually a better idea than Halloween II from 1980 as well, a truly beloved sequel. Obviously a bizarre money grab bringing back Jamie Lee Curtis (to pretend her final showdown in H20 never occurred) and that Halloween 2018 was actually some sort of “new” idea, they seemed successful in somehow fooling the masses into coming along on their imo pathetic trilogy.
Now they are back again-this time to make the “REAL” sequel to the Exorcist-one of the most iconic horror films of all time. Danny Mcbride has apparently penned the true sequel we always deserved! Here’s the new trailer, that erases the events of all of the sequels.
Meanwhile, I’m here to remind everyone that an amazing sequel already exists to the Exorcist, one that was written AND directed by William Peter Blatty who wrote the original story/book to the beloved 1973 film. Everyone who is about to be tricked into this “new legit” timeline from the Pineapple Express bros, I just want to remind you The Exorcist III is the real sequel you need to see/revisit. Don’t let these guys fool you again. Just make sure to completely skip The Exorcist II(1977), it’s one of the worst horror sequels out there, even though it does indeed bring back Linda Blair as Regan. Thankfully Blatty decided to bring the Exorcist back into the spotlight way back in 1990.
The movie, based on his 1983 novel ‘Legion’, is a horror at it’s best and ties to the original film in a very unique and inventive way. In the third installment we follow Lt. William Kinderman, Father Damian Karras as well as Father Dyer, all characters from the first film, who’s in the midst of a murder investigation that oddly resembles a bizarre case of his from fifteen years back. On the trail of a what he believes to be a serial killer, things begin to manifest similarities to the demonic events that occurred almost two decades ago during the original Exorcist. Kinderman begins to suspect there’s more than meets the eye going on as the murders pile up and this time comes face to face with literal demons from the past.
It’s also got a great cast with the likes of George C. Scott, Brad Dourif, Jason miller & Ed Flanders but most of all it’s really it’s own unique legitimate chapter to the Exorcist story. The film is a slow burn but also thick with dread and doesn’t skimp on the scare factor either.
Greene and McBride have stated this is a direct sequel to the first film, of course attempting to capture lightning in a bottle again, this time with two little girls possessed and a poster that attempts to cash in on Blair’s iconic appearance from the original. The trailer also utilizes the classic ‘Tubular Bells’ theme to make the connection to the franchise, but with the overload of factory made demonic possession films we’ve had to endure over the last 20 years this one could easily be lost in the “Blumhouse” if not merely for it’s attached franchise name.
Could this sequel top the third installment? It’s certainly possible, but judging from early reactions I’ve heard it didn’t exactly grip audiences. I’ll give it a shot, but my gut feeling is David Gordon Greene is no William Friedkin and Danny Mcbride is certainly no William Peter Blatty. What this has inspired me to do is pull out the original and follow it up with the third installment to get fully possessed by the brilliance of the real rich lore and again wonder why exactly the Pineapple Express bros think they can yet again craft a better sequel than the series’ creator…..
Universal Dork 