Category: Movies

James Cameron Schools Arnold on Terminator 5!

I just read today that James Cameron has been giving Arnold some serious advice about signing on to another Terminator flick. He expressed to Arnold that basically the last two Terminator movies totally blew. Well I have to say he was right about that, Terminator 3 was a waste of time as it was essentially T2 with a new John Connor and a female version of the T-1000. Totally un-original and un-needed. Terminator: Salvation was a pretty bland attempt at showing the future struggle of Connor, but let’s face it it was pretty lackluster and the CG Arnold just didn’t cut it at the end. Nothing compares to the real thing.

So now what? Arnold is making movies again and naturally he’s got another Terminator movie in his sights. Camereon recently told him not to sign on for another film unless the movie’s main focus was the T-800. Well Cameron since you got your undies in a bundle why don’t you just write and direct the damn thing! My problem with all of this is simple & the question is clear – is Arnold too old to play the legendary cyborg? My answer is yes. I am all for sequels normally and older actors returning as their famous characters, but in this case we simply can’t have Arnold running around at 65 with the leather jacket and shades on reciting witty one liners. I personally thought he looked a little old in T3. Cyborgs don’t age…..or do they? Hmmm…maybe the rest of the skin and muscle ages like a normal human while the machine beneath stays the same? Not likely….but it’s an idea huh? Or they could have Arnold played a really haggard battle scarred T-800 like the one in the pic above-he’d have to sport some heavy make up but it’d work if he didn’t mind looking the part for the movie.

What I think should happen is the next Terminator movie should be directed by Cameron and yes Arnold should of course be the main focus. No questions asked. But, they should have him play the character in which the T-800 was based on, or perhaps Arnold is the man who created it in his image. Perhaps Connor comes back in time (played by Edward Furlong of course this time!!!) to save him as Skynet realizes that it’s creation actually worked against them as the T-800 seemed to always assist Connor in surviving all the past attempts. Any other plot is going to end up being too far stretched, but with the return of the original actors, done right with Cameron attached could be amazing.

It’s really a no brainer on how to do this film correctly, but alas this is Hollywood we’re talking about here folks and somehow they usually manage to fuck it all up…..here’s hoping they read my blog!

Let’s Search for Spock!

Here’s a little video clip for anyone interested in Spock. It’s a dancehall track I wrote in honor of the legendary Vulcan and I recently put it up on Youtube for the whole galaxy to enjoy!

I also put up a Mister Saturday Bandcamp page so you can download some hardcore nerdcore for free….

Anyway check it out if you haven’t already!

The Cabin in the Woods – Go See it NOW!!

It’s no doubt to me that I have seen two of the BEST movies this year at the theater in the span of a week! How often does that happen? Last week I was lucky enough to catch “The Raid: Redemption” which will easily be the best action movie of the year or maybe even the past decade. This Saturday I saw “Cabin in the Woods” and was blown away!

What an awesome original idea for a movie. I know, I know you think it’s just another Evil Dead rip off? Wrong. It’s not at all what I expected, though to say it doesn’t share some similarities with Evil Dead wouldn’t be true. However it’s something truly of it’s own. I did a blog a couple weeks ago about wishing for Hollywood to kick out something original instead of remakes and rehashes. Well this movie is a prime example of what I wished for in every way. A fresh, inventive slice of cinema.

Now I am not going to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet. What I can say is that it best that you know as little as possible about this one if you plan to see it. I purposely avoided reading reviews for this before I saw it and it really did make the experience that much better! So stay away from spoilers for as long as you can!

What I will say here is that it’s a comic book, sci fi, horror fan’s wet dream in every way imaginable. It’s a funny, scary, exciting, gory , unique adventure-with some great twists along the way. The effects are brilliant as well, straying as far as possible from CG schlock as it can. Most of the film has a highly organic vibe to it and when there is any CG it’s used only when needed and tastefully at that. We all know that Hemsworth stars in the movie and I can’t help but think they waited strategically to release this movie, as it was made a couple years ago, to cash in on his Avengers/Thor star power. My question is where does The Cabin in the Woods go from here? I can only hope it doesn’t spawn any un-needed sequels and if it does it better have the same creative team of Whedon & Goddard. Personally I think this movie is best left alone as a one shot. It just can’t get any better than this!

“The Raid: Redemption” Raises the Bar!

I just wanted to take a second of your time here to let you you all know that I saw “The Raid: Redemption” last night on the big screen and it’s by far living up to all the hype. This new Indonesian film pulls no punches and sets the standard for all action films that dare to come after. Sorry future action films but at this point you may want to throw in the towel! Stallone if you haven’t already seen this movie you may want to go back reshoot the upcoming Expendables 2 because I’m fairly certain it ain’t gonna come anywhere close to The Raid.

The last films I saw that came anywhere close were those of Tony Jaa like my personal favorite The Protector and his Ong Bak stuff. But even those now seem to have been under minded by The Raid. I am sure it won’t be long before the films main star Iko Uwais hits American films and director Gareth Evans as well.

It’s funny because Holly wood has already jumped all over this film and are planning a remake…uggh….why spoil a beautiful thing? How about just push this original version?

Also the films other star was Pencak Silat, the Indonesian martial art. Watching this style of fighting is truly breathtaking however glamorized or exaggerated it was. Another star worth mentioning from the movie was Yayan Ruhian who plays “Mad Dog” the main crime lord’s number one henchman. He really serves as the movies major villain and his final battle is one that will be remembered for decades.

The movie is beautifully shot, incredibly tense & jam packed with some of the best action sequences I have ever seen. It’s one of the few action movies I have seen that had the crowd actually cheering, ooing and ahhing. Well I can’t say they just don’t make ’em like that anymore because they did. Step aside John Woo…

Here’s a little video I found that showcases some real Pencak Silat in action in the real world….

The Number One Easter Themed Horror Flick!

Guess what? Easter Sunday is only a couple days away and I’m sure you’re all wondering what the heck are you going to watch later that night while munching down on all your chocolate Cadbury eggs? Well fear not fellow dorks that’s why I’m here to save your Easter with some useless knowledge!

Let me tell you there aren’t too many Easter themed horror movies out there and with the few there are to choose from it’s crucial you don’t waste your time this year. There are some newer movies like “Peter Rottentail”, “Easter Bunny, Kill Kill!” and “Kottentail” that you could waste your time with. All of them look like they’re filmed by high school students filming using their cell phones. So if that’s what you’re into don’t hesitate. I however will be watching the one and only great Easter themed movie….Critters 2!

The first Critters was pretty great obviously borrowing on the trend that the Gremlins started. Well part 2 is actually pretty damn fun also. Directed by Mick Garris this 1988 classic hits heavy on the Easter theme as the residents of the small town of Grover’s Bend mistake Critter eggs for Easter eggs, use them for the yearly egg hunt and soon they are rolling rampant wrecking havoc on the town! They even attack the Easter Bunny himself! So people make no mistake about it it’s Easter themed horror at it’s best…

Michael Bay Destroys Our Childhood Nostalgia & I Don’t Care!!

I really don’t spend too much time thinking about Michael Bay or the fact that he likes to takes everything we loved from our yesteryears as children and teenagers and turns them into a pile of dirty Depends. Really the more I think about it all the more I really really just don’t care anymore! Yeah he had a shot at making an amazing Transformers movie but did you really think anyone in mainstream Hollywood was going to make some totally cool movie version really in this day and age?

Fat chance, every now and again we get something really good these days like The Dark Knight or Hellboy II from Hollywood. But all you fanboys and gals out there need to get over it and move on already! You want to watch a good Transformers movie? Then watch the classic Transformers movie from the 80’s! Are you pissed that Bay has got his hands on the Teenage…or um, sorry excuse me, “Ninja Turtles” franchise? Well then read the original series from the mid 1980’s because you know what? They already fucked up the film when they made it in 1990, I remember back in the day I thought the movie was a watered down shitty ass kiddie version of the dark themes of the original books.

Sure today I accept it and even have a soft spot for the live action cheez of the early 90’s TMNT films complete with Vanilla Ice lets not forget. Sure Bay making a movie will suck big time of course but it’s not like it’s going to be competing against cinematic genius of the original Turtles movies!

So yeah now he’s going to make some Halloween movies. He’s already ruined Freddy, Jason & Leatherface so for him to leave out Mike Myers would be sorta just incomplete in the grand scheme in the shittiest way possible. Besides Rob Zombie already put a lame spin on the franchise when he tried to remake them!

So really at this point who cares? Personally I’m a little tired of Michael Myers anyway I mean the guy doesn’t even speak for cryin’ out loud. People now do you all really need to see him in yet another damn film anyway?! I mean we’ve got like ten films as it is!! Same really goes for Freddy, Jason, Leatherface, Chucky ect ect ect….I if want to see a good film I’ll watch the originals. I just don’t care anymore-I’m tired of schlock that they try to spoon feed us-so you know what? I just am not going even bother anymore. Personally there are a lot more exciting things going on that are new and fresh ideas-Did you all see Attack the Block last year? Or Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil? There are still NEW ideas out there being made that are great. But people don’t expect Hollywood to churn out classics anymore of your favorite childhood nostalgia-watching these major blockbuster movies is like eating shitty junk food and washing it down with some neon colored extreme Gatorade. Sooner or later you’re gonna puke and instead eat something that in the end is better for you and made with a little more care.

So I say Michael Bay, Tim Burton & all you other modern day hacks eat your heart out-go crazy-remake it all! Rob our childhoods! I probably won’t even notice that it’s happening because I have got the classics still and can’t wait for the next new fresh ideas to hit the screens or my dvd player. But the rest of you people stop going and see all this shitty cinema and then complaining! You are all the reason that he keeps on making more shit in the end….

An Old School Take on the Upcoming Avengers Movie!

Check out this animated fan made trailer of the upcoming Avengers movie put together with old school 1960’s animated clips! Pretty funny and really would have close to perfect if they could have somehow found an older version of Nick Fury (this one here is from 1995) as it looks a little out of place with the rest. In the defense of the people who threw this together though it was the first time Fury was animated…still a nice treat for dorks like myself-check it!!

The Two Most Outrageous Upcoming Action Flicks!!

Well here are a couple action flicks I dare any major studio to try and beat! Sorry Stallone I am sure your upcoming PG-13 Expendables II will be fun but in comparison “The Raid: Redemption” it’s going to most likely end up looking like an episode of GI Joe from the eighties! But so far from what I heard The Raid is being hailed as arguably the best action flick of all time. So far by seeing several clips and hearing the synopsis it’s quite possible this Indonesian film will win the medal!

“Deep in the heart of Jakarta’s slums lies an impenetrable derelict apartment building which became a safe house for the world’s most dangerous killers and gangsters. The rundown apartment block has been considered untouchable to even the bravest of police. Cloaked under the cover of pre-dawn darkness and silence, an elite team is tasked with raiding the building in order to take down the notorious drug lord who runs it. But when a chance encounter with a spotter blows their cover and news of their assault reaches the drug lord, the building’s lights are cut off and all exits are blocked. Stranded on the 6th floor with no way out, the unit must fight their way through the city’s worst criminals to survive their mission.”

The next movie looks like it just has to be seen to be believed. It’s opening this week in Portland Oregon where I live and yeah well it looks like the most ridiculous action movie of all time. “The FP” involves two rival gangs who do battle by way of deadly games of Dance Dance Revolution. Yeah you heard that right somehow you can die by playing this game, I am not sure how but apparently in this movie anything can happen!

Obviously this movie wasn’t meant to be taken seriously-but if it had been it would have been even more brilliant! Listen to some of the dialogue for cryin’ out loud! I am not sure if the idea loses it’s charm quickly in this movie but I am willing to bet you never see anything quite like it ever again! This is the “Rocky” of lame dance games! Check it!

Is There an Alternate Version of “The Thing” 2011 Prequel?

I finally got around to watching “The Thing” 2011 prequel I have been trying to avoid for so long. The original 1982 movie of the same name is probably my favorite monster movie of all time! So giving this new movie a chance after hearing about how shitty it was really was a hard thing to do-but I decided to see for myself if the movie sucked as bad as the reviews suggested. My verdict? Yeah it was pretty damn sucky.

First of all this movie was really not much of a prequel. It was basically a remake that tried to do everything the original did but just ten times less impressive. Sure it linked at the end to the Carpenter version but overall this movie didn’t bring anything new to the table. The story was pretty bland, as were the characters even though the movie was pretty well shot and looked very similar to the original-all except for the special effects.

Now we all know that the 1982 version is really the king of practical monster effects. It still remains to this day as perhaps the most creepy and realistic looking effects on screen. The new version however looked as fake and pathetic as ever. Like something out of DOOM interacting with real people. But was it always meant to be that bad? I guess not. The movie originally boasted that no CGI would be used and from what I have read 80% of it was shot with bad ass practical monster effects. Then when the movie was show to the studio they were told the monsters were too slow and they needed the monsters to be jumping around more ect. So they had to go back and reshoot and mostly cover up the old effects with CGI to give it a more modern look. By modern it ended up getting a more fake video gamey look that the kids love so much today. Anyway I am curious-is there a version out there with the original effects?! How about releasing a special edition original cut version? Well here’s a little video that shows you some of the magic that could have been in the 2011 version…

Sherlock Holmes : The Dufus!

I finally got around to check out the latest Sherlock Holmes movie with Robert Downey Jr. and it was exactly what I thought it was going to be,a dumb fun romp of a movie. No surprises really there I enjoyed it quite a bit like the first installment however this Guy Ritchie Sherlock was COMPLETELY different than any Sherlock that we’ve ever seen or known of. This confused some and made others angry as Holmes was never an all out crazed brawler in the past. This didn’t bother me too much, sure it didn’t really feel like I was watching a real Sherlock adventure but I don’t mind a different take on classic characters every now and then. That’s why I urge any of you people out there looking for a great different Sherlock Holmes movie to check out “Without a Clue” from 1988.

This is definitely a different take on our beloved hero. In this movie Holmes played brilliantly by Michael Caine is actually a boozing unemployed dufus actor who couldn’t find his way out of a public restroom. The brains behind the operation is secretly Watson played by Ben Kingsley, who creates the persona of Sherlock Holmes so he can solve crimes secretly while trying to secure a position at a highly respectable medical practice. This is quite an interesting take on the legend and it’s a helluva good time.

It’s a treat seeing the bumbling Holmes taking orders from Watson, watching Sherlock hog the spotlight with out a clue as to what the hell he is talking about as he fools Scotland Yard into thinking he’s a superhuman crime solving super hero. It’s a perfect anti-buddy comedy as soon Sherlock’s got everyone fooled and is soon chosen to solve the movies mystery on his own as Watson is suddenly “killed” in a plot by the evil Moriaty and suddenly he has to try and play the part of the legend on his own for real.

I love the period of Sherlock Holmes that’s part of the charm for me with these movies but this one is just a splendid 1980’s movie that’s a perfect watch alongside “Murder by Decree” & “Young Sherlock Holmes” which is hands down my favorite Sherlock flick ever. Though the movie back in the 80’s received relatively poor reviews I think it’s charming little adventure. If you get the craving for more mysterious adventure make sure to check out this often overlooked lil’ gem!