Category: Horror Whore
This Is The End: The Best Potty Humor Flick of All Time?
I saw “This Is The End” this weekend and I’m gonna have to say it’s the best Potty / Dick humor movie ever made. Yeah, This is the End delivers a mass amount of dick jokes and pee pee humor galore, so much that by the end of the movie you wonder perhaps if Rogen & Goldberg wrote the movie when they were thirteen year olds. I can’t deny that this film will entertain the pants off you and probably have you laughing out loud but I ‘ve gotta say this brand of humor can get a little grating in an otherwise fine, gory and action packed flick. Maybe I’m just getting old but seeing a huge dick on everything for me loses it’s comedic power pretty quickly. It was different in a film like Superbad. That aside I’m happy to say the movie was a damn good time.
Surprisingly this one actually does have a bit more to offer than a hundred dick & pee pee jokes. In fact this one does almost play out more like a Shaun of the Dead / horror comedy than I was expecting. It’s pretty much got it all, the usual (and in my opinion tired) stoner comedy, some cool monsters (with huge dicks of course), some gory special fx and a who’s who of “Apatowian” cast members to see meet their demise. One of the best moments being Michael Cera’s fate as the actor plays himself as quite possibly the most irritating human on the planet, snorting tons of coke, grabbing girls butts, getting blow jobs from random girls while continuously whining like a baby. One thing is for sure Cera hasn’t aged well. But it’s clear all involved were pumped to be poking fun at themselves. That’s where the movie does work as we get to see this ensemble get down and dirty. We get to see how a bunch of rich, privileged actors deal with an apocalypse or rapture in this case when they’re some of the last people on earth who for some reason haven’t been “saved”.
These guys clearly had blast with this one and perhaps that’s why in the end the movie despite all the dick, cum and pee pee humor and an a full on overload of product placement worked despite it’s terrible ending sequence. However this leads me to believe that this rivalry of the apocalyptic comedies is going to be easily won by Edgar Wright’s “The World’s End”. Hopefully he steers clear of the excessive dick jokes becuz Hollywood ain’t got room for any more big cocks this summer on the silver screen!
Wolf Cop Takes a Serious Bite Out of Crime!
Damn, I was such a big fan of the original Teen Wolf that I just had to post this trailer for the upcoming Wolf Cop movie! This one looks right up my alley as we got a full on Werewolf cop running rampant around town fighting crime! This little Canadian flick, directed by Lowell Dean is shaping up to an awesome old school style 80’s horror comedy.
I’m a sucker for a fun werewolf flick and can’t wait for this one to drop! I’m happy to see people out there with original horror movies in the works rather than another tired remake. I may have to check out Eerie 13 as well, Lowell Dean’s first movie…
Cops, Robbers & Flesh Eating Witches!
I’m a big fan of Alex de la Iglesia’s movies anyone who’s seen “Day of the Beast” or “The Last Circus” clearly knows that his movies always have something incredibly different to offer to whatever genre he’s directing. His new flick “Witching and Bitching” or otherwise known as “Las brujas de Zugarramurdi” ups the mayhem ten fold as this latest trailer will leave you breathless and perhaps a bit bewildered. There’s no subtitles on any of the trailers so far so check out this quick synopsis they offered as it will help in making sense of exactly what is going on in the trailer.
“Hugo Silva and Mario Casas play two hapless thieves, whose plan to rob a jewellery store unravels quickly when they have to bring one of their sons along, the ex-wife borrows the getaway car, they end up headed to France for Euro-Disney World instead of the planned Morocco, and they run into a coven of flesh eating witches in the Basque country.”
Due in theaters internationally in Septemeber, I can’t wait for this one to be released here in the USA check this shit out…
Awesome Hero Initiative / Walking Dead #100 Cover by Local Chris Herndon!
Had to take a second to give a shout out to Portland Oregon’s own Chris Herndon today as I just saw for the first time some artwork he did for The Hero Initiative 100 Project for The Walking Dead. The Hero Initiative is a charity dedicated to helping comic creators in medical and financial need, has drawn great acclaim for its “100 Projects” in recent years, in which 100 artists draw an original cover on a special anniversary issue. His artwork was for the shocking but otherwise rather dull milestone issue of The Walking Dead #100. Though I had my gripes about the issue itself it sure did generate some great zombie art!
Herndon is a rad up and coming artist who had his work cut out for him on this piece as he was artist and co-creator on the indie series ‘Living With Zombies’. He currently works on Terra Tempo, a dinosaur themed graphic novel series, so his cover idea for Walking Dead #100 was a perfect blend of both his past & present comic book works. Check it below and like his Facebook page before this guy hits the big time!
Frankenstein’s Army: The Coolest Horror Flick of 2013?!
Do you like cool monster movies as much as I do? If so Frankenstein’s Army looks like a total winner here in this most recent preview just released yesterday! I’m big fan of World War II horror movies and this one could shape up to be one of the best ones yet. To me this movie is looking like a great BPRD story arc filled to the brim with insane Nazi monster soldiers.
It appears that the Nazi’s have their own Doctor Frankenstein that’s constructing creatures with some pretty menacing weaponry melded to their bodies. The trailer is jam packed with action gore and some pretty outstanding fx.
I also read a pretty stellar review on BloodyDisgusting.com so this one is going to the top of my “to see list” pretty rapidly. Opening in select theaters July 26th I’m crossing my fingers this one hits a theater in Portland! Check this shit out!
The Top 5 Most Anticipated Monster Movies That Aren’t ‘Pacific Rim’!
Monster movies, why the hell are they so few and far between? I just can’t get enough of a good creature feature. It seems all the hype is around Pacific Rim if you’re a monster fanatic. I’m excited to check that one out, but still it looks a little too Hollywood Blockbustery. A little too slick and videogamey. I’m sure it’ll be fun as hell but there’s only so much glittery CGI a guy can take in one summer!
So I figured I’d see what else was out there that could be promising and a bit more under the radar. So here’s five movies that just might please fans of monster flicks like myself! So in no particular order….
1. Dead Shadows
No idea when this French “End of the World” horror movie is going to be released but I’d bet as we are getting ready for a few big Hollywood “End of the World” movies to hit soon I’ll bet this one isn’t far behind! Still it looks like something that could end up being a lot of fun, though seemingly heavy on the CG. This one has a the awesome old “comet crash brings monsters” vibe to it-check it!
2. Under the Bed
This one looks right up my alley and I’ve already read some pretty good reviews for it. It’s supposed to have a kind of Joe Dante feel to it. To me it’s bringing to mind movies like The Gate and Gremlins, but from what I’ve heard toward the movies third act it amps up the gore with a pretty epic “kids vs. monsters” battle. I mean who doesn’t love seeing kids fight monsters?!
3. Game of Werewolves
This cool looking little Spanish werewolf movie has yet to be released in the United States but it has already got a pretty cool rep building for it. I am a sucker for a fun Werewolf movie and the Underworld franchise just ain’t cutting it! So I have my fingers crossed that this lycan werewolf horror comedy is gonna bring the goods! Supposedly Joe Dante has a new Werewolf film in the works too called “Monster Love” I wish there was a trailer for that one because I’m sure it’ll be awesome!
4. Knights of Badassdom
When the HELL is this thing gonna get released?! It’s been sitting in limbo for long enough and it looks like a delightful Horror comedy. It involves a bunch of LARPERS that accidentally summon and real life demon from an ancient book. They’ll get a shot to try out their real skills in a fight for their life. Lets hope this gets a release date soon becuz it looks like a load of fun!
5. Exists
Why can’t anyone ever make a cool Bigfoot movie? There are a ton of them out there and the best one is STILL Harry and The Hendersons! We came close with ‘Abominable’ back in 2006, which is probably the best killer Bigfoot flick out there, yet still it lacked something. And most recently we got a a few more found footage Sasquatch movies, Bigfoot: The Lost Coast Tapes, Willow Creek & The Woodsman some were decent but none of them left much of a mark. So I am hoping that ‘Exists’ will be worth the wait, simply because it’s an Eduardo Sanchez film. Sanchez is best known for directing the Blair Witch Project so he clearly understands the genre and if you don’t think he can pull of a creature feature then you need to check out his awesome alien flick “Altered”. Expect a trailer soon but in the mean time he gives us the scoop here:
Lastly here’s a call to support “Harbinger Down” a movie in the works by ADI the same people that brought you those magnificent monsters in Tremors amongst others! they’re using all practical effects and using 1982’s The Thing as inspiration, this is exciting!
Goblin Comes to the USA to Perform Suspiria Soundtrack!
So legendary Italian prog rock group Goblin are USA bound to perform their legendary score to Dario Argento’s Suspiria in Austin Texas! Pretty rad idea that was put together by Pantera frontman Philip H. Anselmo and best-selling true crime author Corey Mitchell for the 3 day Housecore Horror Film Festival, which celebrates fright flicks that somehow intertwine with heavy metal music.
For those who don’t know what the fuck I am talking about Goblin was a 1970’s progressive rock band responsible for some pretty outrageous and awesome scores for films like Suspiria, Dawn of the Dead and Deep Red. They will be performing while the movie plays and in fact this is their first live American performance. Pretty fantastic, mark your calendar for April 30th, it’s coming SOON and get more info here!
Wilderness Movie Terror Takes a New Direction With Paul Bunyon!?
Step aside Bigfoot you ain’t the only one in the forest with huge feet anymore! You heard that right, Paul Bunyon has gone evil in the new flick “Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyon”! As bad as this one looks I’m gonna go ahead and say it’s looking more and more like my kind of flick! This ridiculous plot of an evil Paul Bunyon attacking people on a rehabilitation trip in the wilderness sounds like a heck of a lot of fun. From the trailer it Bunyon looks pretty cool too, with a quick shot of Babe the Blue Ox too it seems the giant is on a rampage of revenge!
Maybe what intrigues me most is the fact that Dan “Grizzly Adams” Haggerty is also starring in this one and nobody knows the wood like ol’ Grizzly! Let’s hope he’s got more than a little cameo, I really enjoyed his performance from the late 1980’s schlock Christmas horror flick Elves and hope we get to see him go one on one against Bunyon. A guy can dream at least right?
Anyway check this out if you’re a fan of American folklore icons gone wrong! DVD/VOD on June 18th!
Evil Dead: Setting a New Trend in Mainstream Horror?
So there we have it, The Evil Dead “remake” in all of it’s bloody glory! I saw it this last weekend on a Sunday afternoon matinee, with a packed theater and I am happy to say the flick exceeded my expectations! Kudos to Fede Alvarez for putting his heart and soul into a movie that I feel real horror fans can get behind. I can’t express enough how awesome it was to see a mainstream Hollywood horror movie deliver the gore the way it was meant to be. CG blood was no where in sight, the effects made me cringe and the story was simple and brutal. I enjoyed it even more so because to me this really wasn’t a remake, we got several hints through the film that these events were talking place after Ash’s experience there and if you stuck around after the credits we indeed got a message from the man himself. Alvarez swore up and down that Ash would NOT appear, even in a cameo in this one. I’m not saying the last scene promises anything to fans but the simple fact that we’re now hearing about Ash returning in Army of Darkness 2 and then both movie worlds colliding for one final flick make me just about wet my pants!
evil dead 2013
Now that’s not to say this was a perfect movie, like many reviewers have complained, I’ll agree there’s not much for character development here. But you know what, Evil Dead was never known for in depth character development! It delivered one purpose, to send chills down your spine and attempt to gross you out as much as possible. I think this flick did exactly what is was supposed to and then some. It makes me think of how rad it will be to see Ash plopped into this sick and twisted reality as the same old idiotic hero we’ve come to know and love. Older but not the least bit wiser. Finally giving us fans what we’ve wanted, one more night out with the King.
It seems the movie was a success too at the box office making over 30 Million in it’s first weekend snagging the number one spot. Things are looking good in the world of the Deadites! So let this be a lesson to all these Hollywood so called horror directors. Give people a quality movie, skip the CG blood-it looks like shit and always will, get creative without solely relying on your computer, plan your shots and make us feel and believe that we’re really there fighting for our survival! Something this latest Evil Dead succeeds at on so many levels!
Siskel & Ebert “Evil Dead” 1981 Review
Today we had the passing of Roger Ebert a true mogul in the world of movies. A big part of my childhood as well, as his TV show was seen many times for me in the 1980’s as a kid and I pretty much always could trust his judgement on films. It’s kinda strange knowing we won’t be hearing more from him, but he left behind a legacy…
I thought I’d at the very least post the Siskel and Ebert review of the original Evil Dead back in 1981, as the big hype seems to be the release of the remake this week. Ebert in this one seems to understand that there was something special about the original here. It was always so interesting hearing what these two icons had to say and they did some review some cool and lesser known movies at the time. So what did they have to say about the original? Check it out….Thanks again for Ebert for guiding us to better movies, rest in peace….
Universal Dork 