Tagged: best of the worst

EMPIRE OF THE DARK (1990): The Best “SO Bad it’s AWESOME” Flick Ever!!

Today we cover IMO the greatest “so BAD it’s actually totally AWESOME” film from cult cinema legend Steve Barkett! An utterly ridiculous horror/ action/ family drama/ genre jamboree done only the way Barkett could. If you’re looking for the ULTIMATE movie nite party flick look no further. Empire of the Dark is a truly charming unforgettable, highly ambitious slice of cheez that just needs to be seen to be believed!

MOVIE MELT Podcast: “Squatchtober” Returns With LITTLE BIGFOOT 2!!

Halloween is all the rage, but what the F#$K about “Squatchtober”?! Well it’s back whether you like it or not-so is LITTLE BIGFOOT! Some people might not have wanted a Little Bigfoot sequel-but you got one anyway and here on Movie Melt we go DEEP into the sequel! If you are a giant fan of the PM Entertainment franchise you are in such luck. All the info and unique trivia you ever wanted to know about ‘Little Bigfoot 2’ is awaiting you right HERE on the latest episode!

‘Little Bigfoot 2: The Journey Home’ follows the exploits of a single parent family on a camping trip, yeah three kids and one helluva annoying dad who thinks he’s the most amusing guy on the planet head out into the woods where they run into a weird small man in an animatronic Bigfoot costume that sorta Romas around d the woods with a blank lifeless look on his face, wait, no that’s the star of the show-Little Bigfoot himself! Apparently he’s lost his family to an evil landowner, who wants to put the creatures in a circus, Little Bigfoot is homesick and severely depressed (coulda fooled me-he seems pretty emotionless about the whole affair actually) and his only hope is this little gang of kids to help him get home to his crew and avoid the evil men out to get him!

Yes! We cover all the bases here and even have a wild n’ crazy Bigfoot themed “battle of the bands” to really get you in the mood for some Sasquatch action! We also cover some movies we’ve been watching on our own time that we think you need to check out and soooo much more cinematic brain candy to make your mind melt like a Halloween Hershey’s bar! Check out the latest episode of MOVIE MELT RIGHT HERE!!! 

MOVIE MELT Returns for Uganda’s FIRST & BEST Action Flick!

The latest episode of Movie Melt is here, where we head deep into the jungle’s of Uganda to cover their very first and greatest action film! You better believe it, ‘Who Killed Captain Alex?’ is a truly special film that really goes the damn distance. This wild and totally unpredictable little production from 2010 comes with a true story behind it that’s maybe even better than the actual film itself!

Director Nabwana I.G.G. has a real love and passion for action flicks of yesteryear and against all the odds set out to make his dream come true-create Uganda’s first over the top bonafide bad ass action movie, complete with the craziest CGI “explosions” & helicopter battles you’ve ever seen! It so ridiculously ambitious and manic while being set in the beauty of Uganda just makes the whole experience that much more intriguing. 

It will make your brain melt. But It’s also got some pretty impressive top notch martial arts, wildly over the top villains and instead of the the normal audio track (which was accidentally erased forever by the director) we’ve got a dude named “V.J. Emmie” from Uganda doing a rip roaring “must hear it to believe it” commentary track to spice thing way up.

 Think Mystery Science Theater by way of Africa-with this bizarre version of the film being the only version in existence. It’s a real bonkers movie experience and the lengths the director went to make this movie a reality are a real charm-we get into all the incredible details of one of the most ambitious low budget cinematic gems out there. But this is only the beginning for Uganda’s intense string of films from director I.G.G.. We also do “battle of the bands” and dicuss all the weird movie mayhem going on today as well as chat about some must see rare forgotten gems in one of the most intriguing episodes of the show! Check this shit out RIGHT HERE!

Oh and if you wanna watch it before we take the deep dive it’s free to watch on Youtube. However I highly recommend supporting Nabwana’s future endeavors in Ugandan action at his website right HERE!! Also pleeez call our answering machine and leave us a message dial (724) 246-4669 and let us know what you think of the show or tell us about any crazy cinematic shit you’re lil’ heart desires!!

YTK Horrors: Juggalos from Hell Conjure DEMONS AT THE DOOR!

Moronic demons vs. Moronic humans! Who will win this epic battle you might wonder? Well if you check out 2004’s ‘Demons at the Door’ you’re gonna find out that answer real quickly while also likely lowering your IQ level from severe brain damage by simply observing this incredibly WTF movie. That’s not to say it’s not a damn good time though- It’s just gotta be seen to be believed. I was lucky to watch it for an impressive bad movie nite-paired it up with an equally trashy ridiculous heavy metal infused thriller from 2001 we reviewed here a while back called ‘Turbulence 3: Heavy Metal‘. Highly recommend the duo for a real night of mental cinematic destruction!

‘Demons at the Door’ is really a product of this time filmed in 2001 and later released in 2004, you can see all of the influences worn pretty openly on its sleeves. Director Roy Knyrim, an effects artist who worked on movies like the Abyss, Toxic Avenger II, A Nightmare on Elm Street 3, Auntie Lee’s Meat Pies- really goes the distance here. With the gooey practical effects in full force but also paired with some of the shittiest, pathetic visual special effects I’ve seen maybe….ever? Somehow though it adds to the general charm of the movie making it easily one of the most mind numbing pieces of enjoyable trash I’ve seen in quite some time. That’s a compliment too-this one’s bad to the damn BONE but perfect for a midnight movie.

 I knew after seeing his 2006 film ‘Cemetery Gates‘ (starring none other than Reggie Banister of ‘Phantasm’ fame) I knew I just had to give another movie of his a shot and I’m certainly glad I did. I found this weirdo monster movie on an ultra cheapo bargain bin DVD collection I’d had for a while of ten Z-grade horror films called ‘Urban Chillz’ and connected the dots. Now I’ve got to be honest, I’m quite curious about what other ridiculous gems might also be lurking on that 2 disc collection?

 The premise: a group of military archeologist bone-heads in the deserts of the Middle East become trapped inside their lab after an incredibly idiotic encounter with an extremist (obviously post 911 paranoia) triggers a gate from hell to open outside, leaving, you guessed it demons at the damn door! The demons are after some ancient amulet or something and really amped up on hurling the crassest insults at anyone they come into contact with. Unfortunately for them they’re not the brightest bulbs in the depths of Hell.

From this opening “action” scene it’s quite clear you’re in for some really absurdly executed fight sequences as well as full on numb-nut characters. Both the humans and demon alike are the ultimate low IQ adversaries and for the most trying to play it all pretty straight aside from some clearly dated one liners-equally spouted by both parties. The demons at one point declare they’ve “fucked the Blair Witch” so we know they’re real clever guys and up on the current trends of the time.

The cast is made up of quite a motley crew, a couple of meathead ripped commandos, a hot badass archeologist along with her super smart doctor dad and an angel who looks like Lou Ferrigno’s brother who dresses in leather S&M gear. They square off with these seriously dicey demons and their truly foul mouths. These demons try their damndest to get under the crew’s skin in the vein of Linda Blair in The Exorcist except 1000 times more annoying and unconvincing. These demons are racist, sexist, homophobic and also complete dipshits that are in desperate need a good ass kicking’ in the worst way.

They’re created by way of some pretty impressive (yet stupid looking rubber suits/puppetry) old school practical effects and there’s a lot on display here to enjoy for creature fanatics. They’re big, gross and full of green slime that’s just waiting to ooze and spurt geysers of blood. One of the demons is even portrayed by Richard Elfman and is one of the most annoying movie monsters put to film-you’ll seriously wanna bust his chops as soon as his mouth starts a flappin’.

Spoiler alert-there’s plenty of demon ball busting to bring down the house and the whole affair is quite a spectacle to behold. With a quick run time of just over 80 minutes it’s a short and sweet little creature feature/demon romp that’s also got quite the soundtrack-it’s jam packed with Insane Clown Posse tunes, spilling with “Juggalo juice” some might even say! Apparently the director also directed an ICP video as well as their 2006 horror anthology film ‘Chronicles of the Dark Carnival’. 

Lastly I’ve just gotta report that the final act of this film is one of the biggest WTF finales I’ve ever seen-you WILL lose brain cells after viewing it-and I’m NOT trying to be funny. I think you’ve just got to see it for yourself to really believe it. I’m now a bit of a Roy Knyrim fan and just got to track down his other films in hopes they’re as entertaining as Demon’s at the Door and Cemetery Gates-it’s quite a tall order indeed. This one is destined to be a cult favorite, the whole thing is currently on Youtube or you can track down that weird ass Urban Chills dvd! Be ready for some of the worst CGI ever put to film and one of the most idiotically entertaining horror movies of the early 2000s…..someone clean this up for a sweet blu ray pleeez!

Here’s a funny IMDB review, it features one of the actors who played a demon in the film check out his insight: “Forgive Me, for I knew not what I did. Yup, thats me under tons of rubber and goo. Shot on one long day in North Hollywood in front of a green screen, I played, the Demon, at The door. Thats my Blair Witch line, uttered with as much emotion as I could, fed to Me by the director himself. Under that 10 pound rubber mask, I huffed and I puffed and howled, because the contact lenses of the original make up design were unwearable. I got paid nothing, so I’m still proud of what was done. You get what Your paid for here. I did a favor for a friend and never heard from said friend again. Hope He’s O.K. What a shock to see it at a Highland Park Blockbuster several years later, actually release on the unsuspecting public. Sheeeesh!!!”