Universal Dork

The Most Unsuccessful Blog on the 'Net Since 2009!

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  • Obscure Super Hero Flicks! Part Two!!

    So you just couldn’t get enough of Thor this weekend huh? You’re still craving your super hero movie fix like a maniac? Well calm the hell down and check this shit out! So here we have another amazing movie that you super hero fanatics probably have NEVER seen before! So instead of watching Iron Man 2 again watch something with a little more class already! Fear not because Argoman has arrived!!

    This Italian film from 1967 features the masked playboy Argoman fights to retrieve the worlds biggest diamond from crazy evil woman named Jenabelle and her henchmen of  villainous robots! Argoman’s kryptonite apparently is unfortunately having sex! Where he loses his superpowers for hours after the experience! Sucks for him!! Oh well no pain no gain I guess! Check out this trailer to see this guy in action!

  • Bendis, Maleev and Moon Knight!

    Today the brand new debut issue of Moon Knight came out and I have got to say I set my expectations pretty high. What I have been hoping for here is that lightning will strike twice-meaning Bendis and Maleev will bring to Moon Knight what they did for Daredevil years ago. Let me start by saying the Bendis / Maleev run on Daredevil was one of the best reads I have ever had on a comic book. It was easily one of the most consistently great ones at the very least.

    Now however Bendis, who lives right around the corner from my store here in Portland Oregon, has become less than impressive in my opinion in the world of comic books as of late. However (more…)

  • Obscure Super Hero Flicks!! Part One!

    Damn there are alot of super hero movies coming out huh? Thor, Captain America, The Avengers, The new Superman reboot! Jeez, these movies are still killing it at the box office! The only problem is is what are all of us dorks gonna do in the meantime while we wait for these blockbusters?! Well people, wonder no more – I have the got the cure for your super hero fever right here!

    I am going to recommend  you a few lesser know super hero movies that are sure to keep you on the edge of your seat!! Now ese may not have the budget of say Iron Man 2, but I think you’ll agree today’s choice is sure to fill the empty void in your life…Check out Super Fuzz from 1980!

  • World’s Greatest Horror Themed Music Videos! Fat Boys!

    It’s been a while since I have posted any new horror themed music videos, quite simply because I thought I had them all covered-well I was dead wrong! It suddenly dawned upon me that The Fresh Prince was not the only one who rapped about Freddy Kruger back in the 1980’s – we also had “Are You Ready for Freddy?” by hip hop pioneers The Fat Boys! Check out this classic video! I have also heard that the Fat Boys are back at it again, with Doug E. Fresh replacing the late great Buff Love , The Human Beatbox (rip), gearing up to do some recording and touring!

  • Comic Book Cover of the Week! Savage!

    Well folks if you’re fans of the Hulk it just DOESN’T get any better that this! Here you have probably my favorite picture ever drawn and or painted of ol’ Jade Jaws by none other than the legendary John Buscema! This one comes from The Hulk Magazine #26 from 1978. The Hulk magazine was called also The Rampaging Hulk, and to be honest they all had pretty amazing covers. They were  essentially big Hulk comics, mostly printed in black and white, with original stories written exclusively for the magazine. They often times had back up stories by various other non-Hulk related characters and often times a Hulk “villains gallery” after the main Hulk story. Anyway when it comes to the Hulk this is what I always picture in my heads as what he should look like-a monster! I challenge anyone to provide me here with a better picture of the Hulk! Yeah it’s a dare!

  • Guillermo Del Toro to Remake The Swamp Thing?

    Well no actually, but wouldn’t that be awesome?!? It occured to me last night as I threw in Wes “Scre4m” Craven’s Swamp Thing last night before I hit the sack that there are some movies that I’d welcome a remake for provided they have the right director attached-Swamp thing is one such movie.

    That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy the ridiculous vibe of the original Swamp thing or even the more campy (if you can believe that) Swamp Thing 2 (more…)

  • The Apes are Back AGAIN!

    Check out this brand new trailer for the upcoming “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” movie. This is the prequel that tells the story of how the apes became “intellegent” and then became the rulers of  Earth. It looks like a  pretty interesting movie so far and  hopefully it will be leaps and bounds  better than Tim Burtons flop!  This is one story that needs to be told and so far it looks like Weta has done a good job with the Apes-what do you think?

  • What do David Bowie & Wolverine Have in Common?

    Word on the street is that The Wolverine, the sequel to the god damn awful “X-men Origins: Wolverine” is possibly back on track after the recent depressing news that Darren Aronofsky, had left the project. Naturally I thought the worst, thinking our new director would be some hack like Michael Bay or Uwe Boll and we’d get a repeat of the last movie-more shit served up hot for us true Wolverine fans.

     

     

    Well it seems someone out there still gives a damn about ol’ Wolvie as new has hit that Duncan Jones, son of David Bowie and director  of the amazing sci-fi movie Moon and most recently Source Code  (which I’ve yet to see). If you’ve seen his work you’ll agree that if he does indeed direct The Wolverine we’ll be getting something special from a director who actually cares about the final product. So once again, I am excited about  a new Wolverine movie, so please guys don’t let me down again….

    Check this interview out where we get a little bit of the scoop on Wolverine!

  • The 1980 Incredible Hulk Portfolio Must be Mine Again!

    Way back in 1980 I had the coolest pictures of the Hulk ever! They came in the Marvel Super Hero Portfolio collection and one of the collections was based entirely on ol’ jade jaws himself!! I just ran across these on Ebay while searching for vintage super hero t-shirts and stuff and it was like a blast back in time!

    So naturally it’s bidding time and actually they are not pricey at all. I thought I’d share these amazing pics here for anyone who’s never seen these awesome painting by Fastner & Larsen who also did an amazing Spider-Mna portfolio as well! Check these bad boys out! 

    (more…)

  • Alice Cooper’s Monster Identity Crisis!

    I loved it in the 80’s when rock stars starred in bad horror movies! One such movie, which is a real stinker is Monster Dog from 1984 starring Alice Cooper. What really do you expect from Claudio Fragasso, best know for directing Troll 2?! C’mon! So yes let me be honest with you this movie is pretty bad-but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have it’s redeeming qualities!

    The plot is simple, Cooper stars as Vincent Raven, the world’s hottest rock star and he’s traveling back to his home town to make a new hot fresh video (which by the way is a total piece of shit once you see how it turns out)! He brings along a bunch of his annoyingly square friends, who on their way to his old creepy childhood mansion home run into…..a god damn monster dog (and the token creepy crazy old dude who tells them they’re all….DOOMED)!! (more…)