Universal Dork

The Most Unsuccessful Blog on the 'Net Since 2009!

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  • Colossus get’s wasted!

    One of my all time favorite X-men stories has got to be in issue #183 entitled “He’ll never make me cry” from 1984! The X-men aren’t in outerspace or saving humankind from Magneto’s twisted plans. This is the type of story I wish I would see more of these days in comic books. A day in the life type of story where you really get to know the characters. What it would be like if you could call up Wolverine and have him meet you at your local watering hole and drink yourselves silly together. This issue’s plot is simple Colossus, whose returned with the X-men from outerspace, dumps Kitty Pryde pretty harshly as he explains to her how he fell in love with another woman when on the most recent adventure with the team.  

    Uncanny_183_cover

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  • Danzig’s new version of “Mother”!

    We can all agree that today Danzig pretty much completely sucks right? He’s making some pretty awful music and refuses to give his fans what they really want-a damn Misfits reunion already!! Anyway check out this video remix of Danzig’s hit,”Mother”. Like Danzig recording the vocals after a drinking a case of beer and a few shots of whiskey, it’s pretty awesome….

  • The Undirectable Klaus Kinski!

    I recently rewatched “Crawlspace”,  the 1986 slasher classic about a derranged nazi landlord who only rents rooms to cute girls and then spies on them through heating ducts in the building. Oh yeah he also likes to torture and kill them in the attic. I remember always seeing this the cover of this movie in the video store when I was a kid and the guy’s face always freaked me out a bit. Well there was a reason for that, because the movie’s star, cult hero, Klaus Kinski was out of his damn mind!

    crawlspace_lrg

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  • Wolverine take off that stupid mask!

    Yeah check this out, Wolverine needs to take of that damn mask and put on his real one! You’d think Tom Cruise from “Eyes Wide Shut” was coming over to take him to that fancy Kubrick party with Nicole Kidman!  Sorry I had a few too many last night and this is the best I could come up with today…

  • Harry Potter as The Hobbit?

    Rumors are flying that Harry Potter’s Daniel Radcliffe is up for the role of Bilbo Baggins.  Thank god it’s not Justin Timberlake! From what I read at The Los Angeles Times’ Hero Complex blog, he’s one of several actors being considered in Guillermo del Toro’s “Hobbit” to play the lead. James McAvoy (“Wanted”) is also apparently in the running as well.

    daniel_radcliffe_99@Hey Potter put some clothes on you’re making Shadowfax nervous!

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  • 1987’s “The Nest” Delivered!

    I find some bad ass VHS tapes at the Goodwill Bins here in Portland Oregon! A ton of cheezy awesome wretched horror flicks are always coming my way. From Roger Corman’s Concorde Pictures comes “The Nest”  which was one of my most recent finds and it was pretty bad in a very good way! Set in a quiet town of North Port, the citizens there encounter a serious roach problem which is only about to get worse! That’s when the cool guy Sherrif Tarbell enters the picture with suspisions that the town’s mayor is in ca-hoots with an evil genetics corporation called INTEC  who’s secretly experimenting with roaches and trying to hybridize them with other animals and yeah you guessed it humans!!

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  • SCREAM 4 Anyone?

    So it has been officially confirmed recently that “Scream 4” is indeed in the works rather than a remake of the original (thank god!). The good news is also that yesterday David Arquette and Courtney Cox have also officially signed on to return as Dewey Riley & Gale Weathers. I’d like to also mention that about 8 years ago I met them both by chance at a Wherehouse Music where I worked in Jacksonville Florida and they were actually pretty cool people with pretty decent taste in music. Anyway I have always been a big fan of the Scream movies. Infact I remember seeing the first one in the theater and being pretty blown away. Scream gave the horror genre the kick in the ass it needed at the time, making going to see a horror movie in the theaters a damn fun time again. It also set the trend however to a ton of immitators that made going to the theater to see a horror movie a collossal waste of time and money!

    courteney_cox_david_arquette_scream_3_001

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  • Who was your Horror host?

    Back in the 80’s when I was a kid living in the Fox Valley Wisconsin there was one show every weekend I was sure NOT to miss-Chiller Theater! This was an awesome show that showed some pretty terrible horror movies from the 60’s and 70’s mostly and if you were lucky maybe one from the 80’s occasionally. It was a local broadcast out of Green Bay Wisconsin and it’s host was none other than “Ned The Dead”.

    Ned_WLUK_promo_web

    I am not exactly sure why good ol’ Ned entered my mind this morning but just the thought of him brings back alot of great memories from my youth. I found some segements of him on youtube and then the memories really flushed back! Just the sound of his voice, his manic laughter and the sight of him in his broken down ticket booth was enough to put a smile on my face today. I wonder where these type of guys are now today? I heard Rumours that he’s back on TV in Wisconsin? Why doesn’t Portland have a “Chiller Theater”?  That is something that needs to change! Anyway it got me thinking about other areas of the country and anyone who checks this site-who were your local Horror Hosts?!

  • Justin Timberlake rumoured to star as the Green Lantern….

    Hmmm….so I have heard a rumour that pop star Justin Timberlake is reportedly been considered to wear the emerald power ring on the big screen. Acccording to Aint It Cool News  they have begun screen testing for the role of the Green Lantern and it appears that Timberlake is in the running. I wonder what the Guardians of the Universe would think about this huh? I could think of about two dozen people that would make a better Green Lantern than Timberlake but then again what do I know I am just some nerd with a blog about comic books and Sci Fi with “The Beyonder” at the top of our website as our mascot!

    green_lantern_alex_ross

     Anyway this is what they had to say about it:

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  • Saturday Night fights!!

    It’s Saturday night here at Universal Dork and I think everyone should watch this segment from an AMAZING movie called “Undefeatable” to get pumped up for the evening! If you’ve never seen this you are in for a treat! If you have seen it maybe you need to be reminded why it’s probably the best, most well choreographed fight scene in cinematic history. Prepare to be blown away!~ ENJOY!