Universal Dork

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  • Real Life Scooby Doo!? Saturday Morning Massacre!

    I have just read a review for “Saturday Morning Massacre” at Ain’t It Cool and it’s mighty clear they thought it was one of the coolest movies around! Basically the premise is that of a real life Scooby Doo adventure, two male and two female mystery hunters and their dog cruise the countryside in their vintage van in search of things that go bump in the night! Only after solving countless mysteries they come to the conclusion that ghosts and monsters really don’t exist, that is until they venture into one creepy old mansion. There they come face to face with pure evil and their ghost busting skills are put to the ultimate test!

    Sounds pretty rad to me and they so far described it as equal parts comedy and true horror. So naturally I hunted down the trailer to see what all the hype is about and found the trailer to be a little bland. What do you think? This movie premieres in LA later this month but otherwise has no release date. I hope it lives up to the Aintitcool hype-meter!

  • The Descendents Get a Rad New Trailer for Their Documentary!

    So this is a website dedicated Dorks, Nerds & Geeks so naturally it’s the perfect place to hype up the upcoming Descendents / ALL documentary, “Filmage”. To those of you who may live deep in a deep dark dungeon, The Descendents are hands down the BEST pop punk band of all time. Pop punk you ask? No folks I am not talking about Blink 182, Good Charolotte, Sum 41 or Yellowcard I am talking the good stuff because The Descendents started it all as the godfathers of the genre. They started way back in 1978, their lead singer Milo is a punk rock icon and a huge nerd.

    artwork: Gary Musgrave

    Well finally these guys are getting the respect they have long since deserved as they reunited a couple years ago and started headlining festivals and one off shows all over the globe. That’s when Filmage began filming and soon we’ll finally be able to get the real story on the band and their struggles. We’re getting some great new punk rock films as I believe a Bad Brains documentary is in the works as well and the recent SNFU film about Chi Pig and Color Me Obsessed about The Replacements.

    Now this might also bring fans to wonder if the Dents are planning on recording a new record? I am going to have to say yes to that question, I have already been given confirmation by two inside sources that Milo has indeed been hanging around The Blasting Room recording demos! Don’t believe me? Well wait and see. The question now though is what are they planning? There is a full album of material that was recorded by the original line up before original guitarist Frank Navetta passed away in 2008. This material was an album that was never released and preceded their classic “Milo Goes to College” album regarded by many as one of the best punk rock albums of all time. All it lacked was Milo’s vocals. However we may be lucky and get two albums perhaps an album of all new material as well. For the meantime I will be watching closely for a theatrical release of Filmage! Check out the newest trailer!

  • Moonrise Kingdom: Easily One of the Best of 2012!!

    I saw Moonrise Kingdom this weekend, the latest from Wes Anderson, is easily one of the BEST movies I have seen this year and in my opinion the best yet from him. It packs an awesome star studded cast, Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Frances Mcdormand & Bill Murray but though they all deliver hilarious performances the true star of the movie is Jared Gilman, the misunderstood run away khaki cub scout.

    I have found most of Anderson’s films comedic, but in this one in particular had me laughing out loud for pretty much the whole movie. It seems Anderson has been changing his game a little bit with his last couple movies. Switching the tone a bit with Fantastic Mr Fox and now with Moonrise Kingdom we’ve no longer got a movie about a bunch of rich confused siblings at odds with their parents, I mean isn’t that pretty much what all of his movies are about? Well this time we’ve got the love story about two runaway twelve year olds, set back in 1965 as their families and cub scout troop set off to find the odd pair on a beautiful tucked away location in Rhode Island. The two share a special bond that only they seem to really understand. To put it into perspective Jared Gilman’s character simply warns his new twelve year old beau early on in their adventure that later “he may pee the bed” oh so very nonchalantly.

    This movie is Anderson’s most hilarious to date but also it’s a beautiful charming little coming of age tale. It’s filmed as if seen through the eyes of child, visually sensationalized as a normal tree house seems incredibly exaggerated as it towers far too high above the cub scout camp. This one is for everyone, many who’ve felt a bit alienated by his earlier work will truly appreciate everything about this movie. Truly one of the best films of the year…

  • “The Shrine”: Another Reason to Avoid Demonic Statues!

    I am quite a fan of Jon Knautz’s Jack Brooks: Monster Slayer, I love his old school approach to the movie using all practical monster effects. It was awesome and I think that when he finally gets around to making a sequel it’s going to be even better than the first. So far he has only made two full length movies, his second being the recently released on dvd, “The Shrine” which I have been looking forward to for quite sometime now. It wasn’t quite worth the long wait but it was a damn good attempt. It had quite an intriguing story though and a nice twist ending I gotta admit.

    The premise is quite simple a trio of reporters head to Poland to check out the disappearance of a tourist there and end up in a tiny village in the countryside. There this quaint little town is filled with some seriously oddly aggressive people, one being Trevor Matthews, Jack Brooks himself (more…)

  • Owen Wilson as Nomad in Captain America 2?! Maybe!

    Wow did you hear the big news today about Captain America 2?!! Oh My GOD!!! Holy Shit!!! It’s official true believers!! Cap has got directors!! Two Brothers!! Nope NOT The Wachowski Brothers! No the………….Russo Brothers?!! The who?!

    Wait these guys must be like totally underground, let me guess they helmed some super bad ass action flick that only a handful of ultra comic hipsters have seen?! No? Wait…wait a second…they aren’t the Russo Brothers as in the directors of “You, Me and Dupree” are they?! No….wait…yeah?!

    Hmmm…um ok then, well Marvel you know what? You SURE know how to get the Hype machine oiled up and moving on this one! Can we at the very least please have Owen Wilson play the slacker super hero Jack Monroe aka “Nomad” to show up to crash on Captain America’s couch like he did in the 1980’s?

    “Captain America 2: You, Me, Dupree & Nomad” Come on at least give us that to look forward too! If it happens folks and it’s actually not a bad idea, you gotta say you heard it here first 😉

  • Give Me My GOOD Hulk Comic Books Back DAMMIT!

    I LOVE the Hulk! Let it once again be known! I will prove it right here and now with my new song “Don’t Make Me Angry!” which I wrote about the green goliath and my alter ego Mister Saturday’s gamma radiated adventures together. What? You never heard of Mister Saturday? The intergalactic nerdcore dancehall reggae sensation?

    Well believe me I am a big star in the Andromeda Galaxy, Vulcan, Malkor III, Hoth and Naboo. So Earth hasn’t been a huge priority up until recently. Below is the song-however a proper video is in the works and should be filmed by the end of the month!

    Lyrics:
    Don’t make me angry, lord have mercy, now Mr. Mcgee

    Don’t make me angry, you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry

    (more…)

  • Should the Wolverine Movie Franchise Be Rebooted?!

    I have been thinking about this for a while now, do I really want to see another Hugh Jackman Wolverine on the big screen? To be honest I’m not too sure I do anymore. I’m really not very excited about the Spider-man reboot to be honest and I’m quite not sure why? The last Spider-man movie was terrible, in fact I am not sure looking back how much I really like any of them anymore. I guess I just see more of the same for the movie Spider-man and I guess I’ll just have to wait and see the film in order to get excited.

    New is it seems that shooting for the Wolverine sequel is set to begin in August in Australia. Hugh Jackman claims it will be better than the first film. Hmmm…well it really won’t take much to be better than that and hearing him say that isn’t exactly building the hype machine for the flick. Personally I think it may be time for someone new to take over the character. Start fresh. I’m having a tough time erasing the last two films he portrayed our favorite berserker in, they plague my mind often and when I think about them they often put me into a state of rabid dork rage!

    Now first I must clarify I really do love Jackman as Wolverine. When I first saw him as the character it gave me the chills! Aside from being too tall, he was the perfect man for the job. Unfortunately when Singer left the X-Men to make a very bland Superman flick things took a serious turn into Shit-Sandwich-ville. By the time we reached X-men Origins: Wolverine we were sinking into a swamp of turds with no redemption anywhere in sight! To me I just CAN’T sit through another shitty Wolverine movie. Since I was young I always dreamed of a solo Wolverine movie and look what I got after all the years of waiting. It’s just not fair to Wolverine that Batman got Christopher Nolan. So now here we are another Wolvie movie in the works. I personally hope it falls through again. I then hope Marvel reboots the shit out of it!

    It’s time to move on. Jackman was great but we just can’t erase the past here people. It’s like a girlfriend or Boyfriend who cheats on you, sometimes it just can’t ever be the same! That’s how I feel. My advice is start fresh. Don’t put him in any of the X-men films for a while. Start Solo. Get a great director who understands and loves the character. Let’s get gritty. This time let’s see what it really looks like when a mutant with Adamantium blades gets pissed off. Let’s see Wolverine slice and dice like he does in the comics. No more PG-13. It’s time for an R-rated Wolverine movie. Start the film off when he’s found in Canada by James & Heather Hudson just after the Weapon X experimentation or like the upcoming movie in Japan only based on the Frank Miller / Claremont mini series of the eighties.

    Now with that out of the way there’s just one big problem, who could possibly play Wolverine this time around? How do you all feel about Jackman as Wolverine again? Are you excited?

  • DC’s Bandwagon Gay Green Lantern Reveal: Not Impressed!

    So of course we all know that DC usually follows the trends of Marvel Comics. They always have really, so it’s natural with Marvel getting all this media attention again (first in 1992) with their character Northstar and his recent gay marriage announcement that DC would have to jump on the bandwagon and reveal that a “major” character from their roster would be coming out of the closet. People began to wonder who?! Batman? Superman? Swamp Thing (now that would have been impressive!)? Robin? Green Lantern?!! Well it ended up being Green Lantern as you all know, which on the surface sounds impressive, wow Hal Jordan is GAY?!! DC wasn’t fuckin’ around!

    Well that is the case unless you read the fine print, see this is the Original Green Lantern, Alan Scott from back in 1940, he hasn’t been a major character for quite sometime until now really. Let’s not forget this new gay version of Scott is a character in an alternate universe “Earth 2” who’s a reboot of the original much much less popular version of the Lantern. Plus there are like a thousand other Green Lanterns out there already the way it is. So are you still impressed? I have to say no.

    One could easily argue that Marvel’s Northstar is not a major player, it’s not like Wolverine is getting hitched to Hank Mccoy or anything. However when John Byrne created Northstar he knew he was gay from the start, however it took Marvel all the way until 1992 to reveal.

    If you read Alpha Flight from the beginning it’s pretty obvious that Northstar, one of Marvel’s biggest dick’s (no I don’t mean it that way), was clearly gay or at the very least not interested in women in the least.

    Check out the full scoop on Northstar’s history of creation in this older post I did. So DC you managed to get people’s attention but next time let’s be just a little more daring!

  • Don’t Go to Prison! You Won’t Be Able to Play…..D&D?!!

    I know, I know what the HELL is this world coming to you ask? Just recently here we get a crazy report in Florida, which isn’t really that surprising, about a naked man eating the face off of another naked man under a bridge and grunting like a zombie. What’s up with that folks? I know I just had to at least address that because it’s pretty much the weirdest thing I’ve heard…well almost ever! Except for this maybe, did you know that if for some weird reason you go to prison and you’re a  rpg-er, chances are, won’t ever be able to play Dungeons & Dragons again!!! EVER!

    Seriously if I were to some reason get life in the slammer I always thought that at the very least I could play some mad ass D&D!!! Think about it, you get locked up for years or maybe even life and all hope is lost…then you suddenly remember D&D is the perfect game for prison! Hell you could play every day, have countless rad adventures up til your dyin’ day…well no more folks. At least in Wisconsin, my native state, where courts decided in 2010 (which I first heard about now) to ban D&D! According to them it causes gang like behavior! Really?! They also went on to add Dungeons & Dragons could “foster an inmate’s obsession with escaping from the real-life correctional environment, fostering hostility, violence and escape behavior,” prison officials said in court. That could make it more difficult to rehabilitate prisoners and could endanger public safety, they said. They also noted D&D could lead to (more…)

  • What’s With This Real Life Mermaid Video?!!

    I’m sure everyone has seen or heard about the supposed real life Mermaid video that Animal Planet showed on their documentary “Mermaids: The Body Found”. I just watched it for the first time, only the video of the kids on the beach and yeah it scared the shit out of me!! Mainly because I wasn’t expecting it to play out like a horror film.

    From what I have heard thus far it’s being hyped as a possible real video, but I am certain it’s just a “show” as AP has already says the show is for pure entertainment. It sure would be cool if the video of the kids on the beach turned out to be authentic, at least for a moment here we can believe in their existence. The only real problem here is that to me this “Mermaid” looks a bit on the CG side.

    Still you can’t help but wonder if there really were mermaids they probably wouldn’t look like Daryl Hanna from “SPLASH” and yeah that’s too bad they’d probably look like a strange sea creature.

    So if you really have the Mermaids on the brain and liked the found footage from Animal Planet’s documentary then you need to check out She Creature, the remake by Stan Winston, easily the BEST monster mermaid movie ever made!! Check it!