Category: Horror Whore

VHS Verdict: ‘The White Buffalo’ is a Western ‘JAWS’ with Charles Bronson!

I never even knew a movie existed where Charles Bronson and Will Sampson (Chief Bromden from ‘One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest’) teamed up to battle a giant albino monster buffalo up until a couple weeks ago. But yeah ‘The White Buffalo’ is just that, a wild west adventure flick that channels ‘Jaws’ in obvious ways but alsogives a lot more to ponder upon later. This 1977 action flick features Bronson as Wild Bill Hickock who’s haunted by nightmares of a vicious monster buffalo, so much so that he’s developed a bad habit of grabbin’ his pistols during the dreams and randomly firing it in real life while he’s in a deep slumber.

The visions intensify and soon Bronson’s on a cross country quest to track down this pesky monster. There’s some great action in between of course where Bronson kicks a ton of ass and gets into some crazy saloon shootouts, cuz let’s not forget what he’s best known for, over the top ass kickin’ action. Meanwhile the awesome Will Sampson plays the legendary Crazy Horse, who’s daughter happens to be slaughtered by the giant buffalo in a bloody massacre on his settlement and it inspires a quest of revenge against the beast.

I really dig this forgotten gem, from the cool sets to the atmospheric gothic journey when Bronson heads off on into the mountains in a stage coach, to the drama between Hickock and Crazy Horse as they try to come to terms with the white man’s dominance in the world. Of course my favorite part of this 70’s horror/action hybrid is the threat of the giant beast looming in the mountians, which I read was inspired by the success of ‘Jaws’. The creature appears within an almost dream like landscape, even when outside of Bronson’s nightmares.

The giant beast is actually pretty well done I think, considering the times, using animatronics and puppetry and well placed camera angles. there’s some pretty bloody and intense scenes later as well when the duo finally confronts the albino behemoth. Considering the movie had a PG rating back then at least it gets nice and dirty when it needs to. We all know those 70’s “PG” rated flicks can feel a lot more like an R rated movie in modern times. The movie definitely works best showcasing the unlikely alliance between Bronson & Sampson and does it’s best to show what sort of bonds and trust can develop against a greater threat. I had a blast with this one and it’s easily become one of my favorite Bronson movies! Track this one down, it’s a unique little largely forgotten monster flick! 

Advertisements

Impostor CHUCKY Alert: The ‘Child’s Play’ Remake Trailer Arrives!

Well it’s definitely a real thing, now that the trailer has officially dropped for the Child’s Play remake and I’m not quite sure just how to take it. I mean, I think the most recent “Curse of Chucky” and “Cult of Chucky” were actually pretty damn good, returning to the more serious horror elements of the first couple movies while still keeping all of the movies cannon. Fans of the horror franchise were pleasantly surprised and after “Cult” it was clear the story wasn’t over and was even headed into unfamiliar territory. Now there’s concrete plans of Don Mancini’s current “Chucky” franchise being continued into a tv series for the SyFy channel AND this new trailer that fully starts the story over again.

This time Chucky though seems to be some sort of interactive doll with artificial intelligence. The just over a minute trailer doesn’t look entirely bad more so than it feel simply unnecessary. I mean we’ve tried this remake business all before with Halloween, Friday the 13th, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, A Nightmare on Elm Street and even the damn Leprechaun franchise. None have stuck and all of them are pretty much forgotten by horror hounds. I’ve got a feeling we’re in familiar territory here with the Child’s Play remake, the original is a perfect horror film in my opinion and I’m not seeing fans wanting a new Chucky, especially since Brad Dourif is still down to play the classic character. Another thing is the main kid character here in the trailer, to me seems a little too old maybe to believably be hanging around with a “Good Guy” doll or in this case a “Buddi” Doll. What do you think though? Is this new remake going to strike box office gold or just be another flimsy Hollywood remake to be forgotten a year or so later? Let me know!

 

‘Ghostbusters 3’ Desperately Needs the Original Cast!!

I was super duper pumped about the recent news of ‘Ghostbusters 3’, that’s being directed By Ivan Reitman’s son Jason. It’s going to be a direct sequel to the 80’s franchise and after literally decades of talk about a third movie it finally seems like things are back on track. We got a new Ghostbusters reboot in 2016, which to me turned out to be another forgettable remake. The 2016 version to me was about as memorable as recent remakes, the likes of Poltergeist, The Thing, Fright Night, Total Recall & The Karate Kid etc. etc. So now we’re lead to believe we’re getting a true sequel, however as more info is being released it’s starting to feel more and more like soft reboot territory.

 

What we’ve been told so far is that it’s going to focus on four teenagers, two boys and two girls who’re set to become…..the new Ghostbusters. The movie is again being called “a passing of the torch” by many. Now I get that Hollywood wants to restart the franchise with young actors so they can make a bunch more sequels and make a big cash, however there’s good way to do this and another more risky way, which Hollywood seems to be unable to resist trying over and over. I’m gonna be honest and straight forward here, fans want the third Ghostbusters film to focus on the remaining living cast from the 80’s. I fear Hollywood just doesn’t understand this and is on it’s way to make the same mistake that the latest Star Wars trilogy has made.

 

 

 ‘Ghostbusters 3′ can go the way of “passing the torch”, I’m all for that. But this third film really needs to center around the characters people have been waiting since 1989 to see. Plain and simple. We need Bill, Ernie and Dan back for one last adventure. This should indeed pass the torch to a younger team, those new characters in this installment should start out as supporting ones and by the movies end, get in on the action to help the old cast defeat whatever spooky threat has materialized. I think the latest Disney Star Wars made a big mistake by not focusing more heavily on the iconic characters from the original trilogy, rather they put them as secondary characters, pushed to the background, getting very little screen time. It’s almost like they were completely clueless about how much the fans wanted more of those classic characters just one last time. We all wanted more Leia, more Han, more Chewy, more Luke hell we wanted more of some damn R2 & C3P0 too! I think by ‘Star Wars: Episode IX’ the newer characters could’ve become much more beloved by fans had they slowly worked their way into the plot rather than feel forced upon us. Continue reading

Movie Review: Thankfully ‘GLASS’ is the Opposite of a Marvel Movie!

So there’s a damn big ‘split’ (no pun intended!) in movie goer’s opinions on M. Night Shyamalan’s latest movie ‘Glass’. The long awaited sequel to both ‘Unbreakable’ and ‘Split’ has caused a ton of debate online, some think it’s the perfect end cap to Shyamalan’s “Eastrail 177” trilogy other’s think it’s a boring waste of two hours. For me I found it to be a compelling end to the saga, in fact I saw the critics bashing this movie so hard that I was truly expecting the worst going in. I mean Shyamalan’s let me down before in big ways (The Happening, The Last Airbender anyone?) so I was fully prepared to begin my next phase of “hatin’ on the guy” once again. Luckily he stuck to his guns and in my opinion delivered a smart, tense & mysterious movie that feels right in line with ‘Unbreakable’ & ‘Split’. He definitely subverted my expectations, not in the same way Rian Johnson did with ‘The Last Jedi’ but in a way which I’ve come to appreciate early on in M. Night’s career. I was hoping that it would avoid trying to be a “Marvel” movie, something it seems all big Hollywood productions are desperately trying to replicate using a somewhat, imo, tired film making style, mixing their usual “witty banter comedy” with gigantic bloated CGI battles, that at this point makes me begin to nod off in theaters.

Instead he creates smaller scale action sequences that feel real, tense and important when they occur. I’ve grown pretty damn bored with the modern superhero movies and their predictable tropes and overuse of green screens & rubbery cartoony CGI action sequences. Glass feels like it could actually happen in the real world and I was pretty scared Night was going to try and tap into that Marvel-esque money making formula that’s all the rage. Thankfully it feels like a natural progression to what came before it, more like a Christopher Nolan style superhero film than ‘Infinity War’ or ‘Aquaman’. That being said I can see how modern audiences conditioned to the ultra fast paced video gamey CGI action stuff would find plenty of reasons to be pissed off at this one. Its a dramatic supernatural thriller with slight elements of the superhero genre sprinkled about, I think ‘Glass’ will surely satisfy fans of the the two previous installments.

That all being said the movie does have plot points I found a bit disappointing. Not because they were bad moves, but because it didn’t go the way I ENVISIONED it to. The movie sets up the audience for things that might not occur at all and this all works as it feels like the real world as opposed to ‘The Last Jedi’ which is based in 100% fantasy in an established universe spanning back to the 1970’s. Shyamalan’s decisions left me disappointed and heart broken, but not in a way that destroyed the film’s appeal to me. It made me want to go back and watch all three in order and the films third act subverts expectations in ways I never saw coming. It feels like Shyamalan wasn’t merely looking to cash in on his new “superhero universe” but rather had a complete story he was willing to start and end. It was bizarre seeing a movie that didn’t feel like it was trying to tease the next installment. It brought back familiar faces from Unbreakable and Split as well and all of them were wonderful in the roles, I’ve got to admit though the characters didn’t do what I’d originally imagined they’d do. Again, I kinda appreciate that.

A few things that bothered me? Wanting more of Bruce Willis and Sam Jackson interacting, but I guess we got a heap of that way back in Unbreakable and there’s some clear problems with how Jame’s Mcavoy’s character was kept imprisoned in the mental ward where the three of them were locked up in. Minor qualms really, my major being one of the key events that occurred at the end left me perplexed and actually quite saddened. Again never expecting they’d go there and go that direction. So all in all ‘Glass’ is one I highly recommend, I give it an ‘A minus’ as it left me thinking about it a couple days later and left me wanting a second viewing now that my expectations aren’t there. Night delivers a beautiful, tense, realistic superhero character piece that fully enhances what came before it. Check it out, but don’t expect your usual superhero flick!

Let’s Get Ready to Rumble: Sam Elliot vs Sasquatch?!!

I’m going to make a prediction here, that the upcoming horror drama adventure movie ‘The Man Who Killed Hitler and then the Bigfoot’ is going to be one of my favorite movies of 2019. This one looks like a ton of fun and it stars Sam Elliot in what appears to be one heckuva oddball adventure. Besides I’m willing to give most any movie that’s got the big hairy ape in it a fair shot. First check out this bad ass poster:

Check out the synopsis:

“The story follows a legendary American war veteran named Calvin Barr (Elliott / Turner) who, decades after serving in WWII and assassinating Adolf Hitler, must now hunt down the fabled Bigfoot. Living a peaceful life in New England, the former veteran is contacted by the FBI and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police to lead the charge as the creature is carrying a deadly plague and is hidden deep inside the Canadian wilderness.”

This sounds right up my alley and although we didn’t get a glimpse of Bigfoot himself I’m hoping we get a fair amount of the hairy guy and a decent game of cat and mouse between him and Elliot. After doing a little poking around the rumor is the movie is much more of a character piece than a campy throw down with Sasquatch, that’s good to know ahead of time for me at least. This one comes out on Feb 8th 2019, check out the trailer:

 

VHS Verdict: 1991’s ‘Children of the Night’ is a Forgotten Horror Gem!

Been on a VHS binge lately watching tons of old forgotten movies, some are of course are steamin’ turds but every now and again you come across something that’s a total delight! I ran across a copy of 1991’s ‘Children of the Night’ and was fairly certain it was again going to be another crapper, however this one proved to be a totally sweet romp of a horror comedy. I’m a giganto fan of 80’s horror and this one while being from 91′ has still got that great old school vibe and charm coming off the tail end of 1980’s. In my opinion a lot of flicks up through 1994 more or less continue to keep that feel in tact. That being said, I had a good feeling about this one when I’d seen that Peter Deluise of ’21 Jump Street” fame was billed as the star, I watched the shit out of that show as a kid in the 80’s and he was one of my favorite characters from the series for sure. Then I noticed Karen Black also starred and then that the director was Tony Randel of ‘Hellraiser 2’ & ‘Ticks’ fame. 

Well I’m pleased to say from the start of this one (which I found out later was actually a Fangoria production) it fully delivered the goods and then some in all the ways I’d hoped for. Playing much more like a horror comedy we get a sweet little story of of teenage girl played by Ami Dolenz (also in ‘Ticks’ from 1993) who lives in a small town and accidentally awakens a wicked vampire lord while swimming in an underground pond below a church. Yeah that’s what she and her buddy do for fun…..well schoolteacher played by Peter Deluise later comes to town to see what’s up and ends up in the thick of a vampire attack where he teams up with the teen girl and a local town drunken preacher played by vinatge SNL alumni Garrett Morris. I gotta say when he arrived it was the icing on the damn cake, he’s known also as “Chocolate Chip Charlie” from the horror classic ‘The Stuff’ from 1985 and in this movie he drives around town at night drinkin’ mad amounts of whiskey in a crazy van that’s got a giant glowing cross spear mounted on the front it it to impale vampires with. By that point in the movie I was already in, but this solidified the deal for sure.

At the end of the ‘Children of the Night’ day plays a bit like ‘Evil Dead 2’ none of it can be taken too seriously but it’s not a full on spoof either. There’s a lot of cool FX work going on here as well as cool spooky inventive sets and locations. It’s a neat little horror adventure that’s not afraid to add some heart to it either. A lot like gory teen horror comedy that’d fit quite nicely along with 80’s cult classics like ‘Vamp’, ‘Critters’ or the highly underrated ‘Night Life’ from 1989. There’s also some cool ass action sequences and you also get some Karen Black super weird vampire lung moments to ponder upon! If you’re looking for some super fun lost nostalgia to watch with a gang of movie maniacs ‘Children of the Night’ is a prime choice in my opinion!

VHS Verdict: 1987’s Aussie Slasher ‘Dangerous Game’ is a Lost Gem!

Ever wonder what the other movies the guy who directed ‘Predator 2’ & ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street: 5’ did? No?! Well I found a great little movie from Jamaican born British director Stephen Hopkins from 1987 called ‘Dangerous Game’ that I had the pleasure of watching this New Years Eve. Something even better was that throughout the movie you could see it was clearly Christmas time, making this one a neat-o flick to watch during the holiday season as well. The premise is simple, a group of rowdy college kids are targeted by a full on corrupt, mentally unhinged cop one day near their campus. Things escalate when later the same cop follows them in what ends up a high speed chase and ends up losing his job after crashing his police motorcycle near the damn police station! This sends the crazy cop into a ballistic rage and when the college kids sneak into a huge department store to spend he night (cuz that’s what people did in the 80’s!) naturally he follows them in and hunts them all down!

This one’s a true pleasure to watch, it’s got some great teenage characters, one who’s like the Aussie version of Duckie from Pretty in Pink. These aren’t really your typical throw away annoying teens, which is always good for a movie like this when you’ve got a deranged killer on the prowl. It sucks to not give a shit if characters bite the dust cuz they’re annoying or have no personality or sometimes when you want the slasher to actually catch his prey! It does a damn fine job keeping you invested in the creepy ass game of cat and mouse that’s going on onscreen. It’s also got a great location going for it, the giant dark department store is a maze of 80’s awesomeness, with tons of Christmas trees, blinking x-mas lights and Christmas decorations scattered about. There’s also some super rad scenes up on the rooftops that are pretty stunning, the cinematographer does a great job all over in this film. The killer cop is played wonderfully by Steven Grives as he’s quite convincing as an unhinged force to be reckoned with. The movie’s got sweet action sequences as well going for it, some I gotta say, over the top in a great way, like a motorcycle chase inside the department store is total crowd pleaser for sure.

This one’s a great ozploitation 80’s flick that definitely deserves to be on more people’s radar. It’s a damn near perfect horror hybrid action movie that’s a ton of fun for people who’re fans of the 1980’s slasher genre. Though there’s not a ton of gore, there’s more than enough nail biting horror and suspense going on, it’s the more superior version of a similar American cult classic slasher flick ‘Hide and Go Shriek’ that came out a year later. Track this one down if you’re looking for something to add to next years holiday horror play list or just happen to love the 1980’s as much as I do!