Universal Dork

New “Marvel Knights” Comics Show True Potential!

December 12, 2013

Thus far with my limited budget I’ve decided to take a few chances on a couple of the new “Marvel Knights” limited series and I’m so far pretty damn impressed! I’ve been pretty bored with most of the super hero titles I’ve tried to keep up with and honestly have dropped almost all of them. I’ve first got to clarify I don’t get any promo or advance copies here to review, I’d LOVE to do reviews every week of all the new titles. I’m sure I’d find many that would blow my mind. I love all styles of comic books but I’d be liar if I said that I wasn’t first and foremost a superhero fanatic. I’ve tried many titles out there and it feels like perhaps we’re at another stale point in comics at least from the big two publishers. It seems to go in waves, but perhaps the whole super hero thing is a tad overblown these days with the huge shiny Hollywood blockbusters. It’s been reported that Marvel Knights this time around was launched to give some writers and artist with a more independent background a shot at giving some of the more popular heroes a slightly different feel.

Well recently I shelled out some cash for a couple of the new Marvel Knights titles which are right now just mini series. Last month I was pleasantly surprised to read Marvel Knights: X-men by Brahm Revel, who also was the writer artist of “Guerillas” which is now on my radar for must read comics. This X-men story was so impressive to me because of how well it’s smaller scale plot line played out(so far at least) in issue #1. Wolverine, Rogue and Kitty head out on a road trip together to a tiny backwoods town to investigate some child mutants that they believe may be in danger of being murdered. It reminded me of older X tales with a more personal storyline rather than some part of whatever big yearly extravaganza Marvel has planned to try and sell millions of books. It had me pumped to see where it will go next and Revel’s artwork as well was truly impressive with a darker, grittier feel to it. Reminding me that some of the best comic book stories don’t need to involve saving the world every day.

Yesterday I thought I’d give Marvel Knights: Hulk a shot as well, as I have been craving my Hulk fix for quite some time now. I’ve tried over and over to get into Indestructible Hulk but something about it just doesn’t click with me. I was pleased to find that this Marvel Knights Hulk was quite intriguing as well! Basically following Banner as he wakes face first in a river with no memory in Paris and is taken in by a local woman who tries to help him put the pieces back together of how he got there.

It doesn’t take long before things get crazy as some secret organization is hunting him down with giant Hulk like monsters. Like the X-men the story starts out small but it seems like this one is going to get pretty out of control. The art while not as impressive as the X-Men is solid but the story is thus far top notch and filled with mystery. I may have to check out more of these Marvel Knights books if they are of the same caliber. I think there is also a Spider-man MK book too. It’s nice at least to have a few superhero books to look forward to!
Hubba Hubba: Remembering the Marvel Swimsuit Specials!

December 8, 2013

Am I the only one that remembers those Marvel Comics Swimsuit issues?! Yeah, these were as weird as they sounded it was basically Marvel’s version of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issues except with all your favorite characters posing for sexy shots! These were put out by Marvel Annually from 1990 to 1995 and often had funny articles and fake advertisements. It was a strange idea but I’m gonna be honest there were quite a few characters I was kinda pumped to see posing 😉 These are definitely worth hunting down, they’re super funny and ultimately amusing. Anyway here’s a some pictures from those very issues as we look back to those Superhero bikini days!! Yeeeeeah!!

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Filmage – The Story of DESCENDENTS/ALL: Delivers True Nerd Rage!

December 6, 2013

I was lucky enough to see the new documentary “Filmage” over the holidays, a movie I felt like I’d waited my whole life to see! Yeah it was that good and it chronicles the story of the legendary pop-punk godfathers the DESCENDENTS / ALL from their start in the late 1970’s. It’s about time that these guys get the recognition they deserve and it seems as if these days they are more popular than they’ve ever been.

If you don’t know who the Descendents are then this is the perfect place to start as Filmage is premiering now all over the USA. But plain and simple The Descendents are the BEST pop punk band of all time. They’ve influenced countless bands and if it it wasn’t for them It be a safe bet to say that a band like Green Day would have never existed. I pretty much sum them up as the ultimate in real teen angst. The true spirit of what it was like to be a nerdy teen with raging hormones. Growing up in the 80’s I loved punk rock but it wasn’t until I heard them the first time that I really found a band that truly spoke to me as a teen.

The Descendents said all of the shit that you were really feeling growing up, something a lot of the punk bands lyrically were maybe too macho to sing about. Yeah they were most definitely not politically correct, at times even sexist, incredibly sappy, often crude and totally immature but at their core just a band of heartbroken nerds with no punk rock image. They covered the spectrum of hardcore punk while at the same time ripping into shameless love songs simultaneously. How many bands can even pull that off today much less back in 1982?!

Well Filmage gives us the full scoop into the minds of these guys, their lives, their struggles and transitioning from the Descendents into the much less popular outfit ALL back in 1987. The movie was made by true Dents fans and it shows by how much care was put into this documentary. Filled with amazing vintage footage of the band, incredibly personal interviews, hilarious animated sequences and interviews with the likes of Dave Grohl, Mike Watt, Mark Hoppus, Keith Morris amongst many others whom cite the band as having a huge influence on them.

It’s funny, sonically awesome and emotional as we follow the struggles of the band members lives up to current times. The movie in the end is really the full story of Bill Stevenson, the bands only constant member throughout Descendents and ALL while also filling us in on his time as drummer for Black Flag from 1982-1985.

It’s his journey as the band leader and all of the friends along the way that helped make his dream a reality. It tells us exactly why the band is finally getting the attention they deserved all these years. While watching it I was almost glad they never hit the big time, as the band always stayed true to their signature sound til this day. We also get a great glimpse into ALL’s struggle to fill the shoes of the bands most valuable musical weapon, Milo Aukerman, the ultimate nerd front man.

I don’t wanna give away to much of the story but I put this up there on the same level as “A Band Called Death” one of the years best rockumentaries. So check this out if you’re jones’n for the full story of the greatest melodic hardcore band of all time-you won’t be disappointed!

Check out the trailer:
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 Trailer…not so Amazing…

December 5, 2013

The Amazing Spider-man 2 trailer dropped today and I swear I’m trying to have an open mind about it! But True Believers, let’s be honest, if you are an actual real comic book fan of Spider-man then I know you agree this movie’s shaping up nicely to be a giant flaming Electro-cuted sticky Green Rhino-cerous TURD!!

I’m not gonna spend too much time on this depressing topic, because it’s really not surprising at all. Thus far it looks more like a pilot to a video game than to an actual movie. This trailer sports some downright uninspired CGI and some simply wretched versions of the some of Spidey’s most famous villains!

First we’ve got a CG version of Jamie Foxx as Electro flying around like the tooth fairy sporting his new bad ass American Apparel hoodie…

Next we’ve got Paul Giamatti as ‘The Rhino” driving around a tank with horns looking like a reject out of a Michael Bay Transformers flick.

Lastly what angers me most is this new “Green Goblin” or as I like to call him: lame James Franco Goblin version 2.0. Seriously we get another shot of having an awesome Green Goblin, one of the most amazingly rad looking comic book villains of all time and you give us THIS stupid shit AGAIN?!!

Wow we’ve reached new lows here with Spider-man. I guess at the very least Spider-man looks like Spider-man, I mean they cant fuck that up right? Add on a story that looks like it was Sam Raimi’s rejected first draft for Spider-man 3 and we’ve got a total clusterfuck for true Spider-man fans. What a shame. Oh yeah in case you all think I’m just a big whiny baby here’s what the villains of Spider-man 2 should have looked like..

and…

and finally…

Finally people quit telling me that they couldn’t make these costumes work because they would not translate to film well. This is a movie of a comic book, we don’t need it to look real world style. It’s based on a fucking comic book. What’d be so wrong with keeping it that way?
What Would Wolverine’s Costume Really Look Like on the Big Screen?!

November 27, 2013

We’ve all been teased with the alternate ending of The Wolverine movie soon to be released on the unleashed extended cut of the movie which shows Hugh Jackman opening a briefcase containing his “classic” yellow costume. However it seems people in Hollywood still doubt that they could make his comic book costume look good on the big screen.

I however disagree, I say bring it on and this little episode of Super Power Beat Down(which I just first saw now) looks pretty damn cool as we see Wolverine in his yellow costume take on the Predator! Skip to the 4 minute mark in the video if you wanna skip over the the “geek” questioning on the issue of who would win between Wolverine and The Predator. It’s obvious to me Wolverine would destroy the Predator-I mean Danny Glover, Arnold and Adrien Brody did it!
Rise of The Machines!! Real Life Robots are Preparing Take Over!!

November 24, 2013

I’m pretty amazed by these real life robot DARPA has been designing and a little bit frightened at the same time. DARPA stands for Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency. They design some pretty weird things for the military that often times look and sound as if they were pulled from a science fiction movie.

Much of this agencies inventions are shrouded in secrecy but some of this stuff is making it’s way to the public today showing off the future of our military with weird robots seemingly pulled from a Terminator flick! Check out a few of these videos as they show off some of their robotic technology that’s still being developed! Watch out first we had the NSA and now we’ve gotta worry about killer government robots-anyone know where I can get a hold of Kyle Reese?!
Audrey 2: Still One of the Best On Screen Aliens Ever!

November 22, 2013

Just the other evening I decided to watch “The Little Shop of Horrors” a movie I haven’t seen since the 1980’s and boy was it a treat to behold! I remember I saw this movie in the theaters when it came out in 1986, my mom was cool enough to take me! I had fond memories of the movie as a kid and for some reason hadn’t revisited it in it’s entirety since. Well low and behold this movie was even better now than it was back then! If you’ve not seen this flick I highly recommend you check it out, it’s one of the few musicals that I actually truly love and it’s a remake that’s light years better than the original!

For one I had totally forgotten it had amazing cameos by Steve Martin AND Bill Murray, and their parts in the movie are simply hilarious. It also reminded me that Rick Moranis starred in some amazing 1980’s films I hold dear to my heart like Honey I Shrunk The Kids, Ghostbusters and Strange Brew. It’s a shame we haven’t seen Moranis in a movie since 1996! I’ve heard rumors he may appear in Ghostbusters 3 though(that is if the movie ever really gets made).

What had amazed me most though was “Audrey 2” the carnivorous talking alien flytrap! It was amazing to see this movie monster come to life once again. It’s easily one of the coolest movie monsters I’ve ever seen and in the special features we see just how complex it was to bring it to life for the camera. How they created this creature’s mouth movements was beyond amazing. It wasn’t just a simple puppet. As Audrey 2 grows even larger and becomes more hungry the effects become even more incredible. By the finale of the movie it’s a hulking behemoth that’s a pure wonder to observe. Everything about the movie blew me away, from the sets, to the effects, to it’s awesome songs and it’s charming wit. This film has aged incredibly well, do yourself a favor and check it out again and if you’ve never seen it you’re missing out big time on some 80’s gold!

Oh yeah and the Dentist song is amazing still-they don’t make em’ like this anymore!
The Shaolin Cowboy deliver’s the Ultimate Zombie Massacre!

November 14, 2013

I just recently started reading The Shaolin Cowboy from Dark Horse Comics and so far it’s a blast. I’ve been familiar with the title and years ago browsed through the comic thinking that for the art alone, that it looked like something that I’d love to read. Well about six years ago was when the seventh and at that time the last issue was released. I forgot about the book, and honestly with comic books being around four bucks a pop it sometimes isn’t a matter of wanting to read a title, but choosing what I can afford. If it were up to me I’d be reading or trying out dozens of titles weekly.

Well last month I saw The Shaolin Cowboy was back in a new mini series and this time I decided to give it a shot as honestly I’ve had a hard time getting into my favorite superhero books lately for whatever reason. Well I’m happy to say the book is delivering on a different level than I’m used to. Shaolin Cowboy doesn’t really seem to have a real plot, I could tell this by the weird “the story so far” section that preceded issue #1. The comic book is a strange dream like tale that is a real feast for the eyes! It’s artist Geoff Darrow is hands down one of the best, if not the best in the industry.

Issue #2 was a surreal treat, it featured thirty three straight pages of zombie carnage as the Shaolin Cowboy hacks, slashes, punches and kicks his way through a horde of undead, swinging a bo staff rigged with two chainsaws on each end. It’s a beautiful massacre and not a word is spoken in all thirty three pages. Darrow has claimed this book is his excuse to “draw whatever he wants” and the character “does whatever he wants”, I say that’s more than ok with me, I’ll be back for issue 3 and hopefully the last seven issues will be released in a trade soon.

Lastly, while reading the recent issue I’ve decided that they should consider making a movie based on this book. It’s clearly evident that The Shaolin Cowboy should be played by Sammo Hung. He’s the perfect age and look for the part, and I can only imagine him choreographing these bizarre fight scenes. From Sammo’s back catalog of weird ass movies I’d say he’d be perfect for the part and hell maybe even as director. I said it here first!
Comic Book Cover of the Week! Bill Sienkiewicz & The New Mutants!

November 10, 2013

Here’s on of my fave covers from the 1980’s era New Mutants. Issue number 19 from 1984 always stuck in my head clearly because of the incredible skills of Mr. Bill Sienkiewicz! Seriously, this guy’s artwork is some of the most unforgettable in comic book history. The comic master of the abstract, you always know you’re getting something special when his name’s attached. Back in the mid 1980’s he did some incredible artwork for The New Mutants, most of which was very dark, jagged and gritty. It further set the tone of the mutant based books in the 80’s as just that. Something a little more hard edged than the regular superhero books. This is one of my faves from that era of the New Mutants but believe me all of his cover artwork for the title is breathtaking. He’s a true comic book legend in every way….
The Wolverine Sequel: Top 5 Classic Comic Storylines for the Next Movie!

November 6, 2013

So today we got the news that Hugh Jackman and James Mangold will be back for another solo Wolverine adventure. I say this is good news overall as “The Wolverine” was actually pretty decent until it’s out of place cartoony finale. It was a solid PG-13 attempt at telling a classic yet highly altered Wolverine movie comic book adaptation taken from the legendary Chris Claremont / Frank Miller limited series from 1982. They almost pulled it off too, until in the film’s final act when Mangold suddenly remembered he was making a Hollywood blockbuster and shoved a giant robot version of The Silver Samurai down our throats….uggh…Hollywood can really be the pits sometimes.

So anyway I’ve put together five classic Wolverine stories from the comic books that should be contenders for the next movie. At this point it’s common knowledge they’ll butcher some part of the story, but hey a guy can dream right? So listen up all you Hollywood numbskulls cause here at Universal Dork you’ll get my guidance toward making a movie that Wolverine flick fans deserve. Before I start the list though let me set up a few rules for the next flick.

First make this damn installment “Rated R”! The fans have spoken, we want some blood and guts in the next film. I wanna see him slice some people’s arms off, cut people in half ect ect. There’s no way a guy with adamantium claws wouldn’t cause a complete bloodbath while in battle. So give us some realism this time. Second let’s keep the story and visuals consistent if it’s gonna be cartoony then keep the whole flick that way, don’t insert some cartoon bullshit into an otherwise serious storyline. Keep with the tone of the movie. Lastly lets keep it character driven, keep it personal and let’s not get too many other characters or mutants in the mix, the last film was good in this way. Wolverine wasn’t saving the world, he was on a personal mission. These stories are where he works best, as a loner, when he’s out in the real world, drinkin’ at the bar and some serious shit goes down. Ok now onto my plot suggestions:

#5. Old Man Logan- This was quite an interesting modern Wolverine storyline and since Jackman is getting a bit older this might be a great one to make into a movie. However there could be some problems as The Hulk and Hawkeye are owned now by Disney. Perhaps they could settle on something that’d make it possible for these characters to cross over? Or Maybe this movie could be filmed in 10 years from now when Jackman is truly age appropriate for the story line. A futuristic Wolverine story with Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye would be pretty awesome and of course seeing Logan take on The Hulk would be quite a treat as well!!

#4. Kitty Pryde and Wolverine: Movie based on the 1984 mini-series could be a great sequel to “The Wolverine” as it takes Logan and Kitty Pryde who would of course be played by Ellen Page, who’s already stated she wants to make a solo film of her character from the movies, on an adventure together. So what better way to do this than add Jackman into the mix and kill two birds with one stone? (more…)