Tagged: Jack Nicholson

Hey Jared Leto….The Joker isn’t Fat or Muscular!! Uggh…

What the hell is up with Hollywood and The Joker?! It seems that they just don’t have any real clue on how to go about bringing The Joker to life on the big screen! This new Suicide Squad movie is giving me bad vibes and Jared Leto’s at it again trying to gain weight for yet another role. Apparently this time we may be getting a “fat” or muscular Joker, in a recent interview in Billboard he went to say this about his upcoming role as The Joker-“I’m trying to gain weight,” Leto told his interviewer, while munching on vegan tacos. “It means I have to eat every couple of hours — and I’m terrible at eating a lot.” Does he even know who The Joker is and what he looks like?

Just add some white face paint and there we have it another Joker wannabe!

I’ll go on record saying that I enjoyed Nicholson’s pudgy Joker and Heath Ledger’s normal guy Joker with a painted face and yeah I loved Cesar Romero’s look with his mustached Joker (probably the closest looking to the comic book of the mainstream) but none of those Jokers got it “right”. When I see any of them I have to say “he did a good job but he really didn’t scream classic Joker to me”. I have said it before the only one who truly nailed The Joker’s comic book look was  Andrew “Boner” Koenig from the brilliant Batman “Dead End” short film.

Andrew Koenig, Growing Pain’s “Boner” nails it as The Joker!!!

What’s up with Hollywood? Why would Leto need to put on the pounds to play The Joker? Hearing this news make me pretty disappointed. The Joker is the most iconic comic book villain of all time, so why can’t they give us the classic Joker already? I often wonder why these movies have to tweak a machine that is clearly not broken! Give us a comic book Joker, no face scars, not fat or muscular, just a rail thin freak of man who’s completely bat shit crazy! Maybe Leto should have played the Penguin?! This, Hollywood, is what the Joker looks like…

 

 

 

 

 

 

And if you somehow missed Batman: Dead End check it!

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Listen Up Hollywood! The Dark Night Returns: Starring Michael Keaton!

So I’m just not that pumped on the whole Ben Affleck Batman scenario. I get that he probably just landed his dream job and that they want Batman and Superman to appear in a movie together but I think we could shoot higher! Let’s think about another more exciting movie sequel, a live action “Dark Knight Returns” starring Michael Keaton once again as Batman!!

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I was watching Keaton in a movie recently and it dawned on me that he’s the perfect age to play Batman again, in the role from the legendary Frank Miller story. Seriously. I think this is something that they need to make happen. It would make for quite a treat to all Batman fans and maybe, just maybe we could get Tim Burton to direct. I really don’t trust Burton with anything these days, I suppose he’d need to somehow insert Johnny Depp into the equation, hell maybe he could play Robin?! That’d be if we changed the sex of Robin for the movie but hey it could work if that’s what burton really needed to make himself happy! But if we could get Burton to go back to his roots with this one it’d be quite an experience!

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So what about the Joker you ask? Well…no brainer, Jack Nicholson of course as an old Joker would be absolutely fantastic! Because guess what? The Joker didn’t die in the original Burton movie! Nope! Because we’ve seen it happen in the comics many times, we all know he never truly dies nor do any valuable characters. However they better jump on this idea quick as we’ve heard rumors of Nicholson possibly retiring. How great would this be as his last hurrah?! The movie could show a recap of what happened throughout the years between them, with Keaton’s Batman and we could stick to the same visual style of the first movies.

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To me that sounds like a good time. Far far better than Ben Affleck jumping into the next Superman flick. I mean the first Superman was sufficient but it really didn’t captivate audiences in the way they’d anticipated. But that means that we would hypothetically need a Superman for this Burton version, so who’d fit the bill? I wouldn’t be opposed to Cavill returning, though this universe may be to Burton-esque for him, I’d be ok more so with Brandon Routh returning to the role as he has that Christopher Reeve vibe and ultimately his Superman would have fit pretty good into the 1989 Batman’s universe quite nicely. So there you have it Hollywood! Make this shit happen! This would truly be an exciting venture I’d pay to see more than once!

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What do YOU think?

The Shining Sequel?!

Wow I just read that apparently Stephen King is considering penning a sequel to The Shining! My first thoughts were that this was a terrible idea and it really made no sense for him to do this other than a big paycheck. Since many have said that over the years he’s lost his touch, it made me wonder just how watered down this sequel would be or more so what it would be even be about? Well after an onstage interview at the Canon Theatre in Toronto, the Torontoist  had this to report on the book’s possible plot:

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Batman movies should go back to Tim Burton.

“Never rub another man’s rhubarb.”

-The Joker

I was watching the 1989 Batman movie the other day, mainly as an attempt to convince myself that it’s actually another Prince movie (which is the reason I look forward to time travel. I will convince his Purple Majesty to make more), but  instead I found myself enjoying it the way I did in the theater that summer as a nine year-old.

Following  it up with Batman Returns, I reached a  holy shit! type of epiphany: It hit me why I love these movies so much: They feel like comic books. The Joker, The Penguin, the Gotham City sets, the costumes. They were suspenseful but very comic-like. Dark in a way (Pee Wee dumping a child in a sewer at Christmas!), but also really comical (Pee Wee dumping a child in a sewer at Christmas).

This really got me thinking that Tim Burton needs to continue where he left off. He started something great that went on to become something like the comic-book equivalent of the mullet and more recently to the great, but all-too “real”. Batman doesn’t need to be fucking real, he’s Batman! The more I think about, the less I want his costumes and finances explained to me. Fuck Lucious Fox and Research and Development (But let’s keep Morgan Freeman in it somewhere) and dog-resistant kevlar. Why do we even need to know that stuff?

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