Universal Dork

The Most Unsuccessful Blog on the 'Net Since 2009!

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Tag: film

  • KIDS vs. ALIENS: If “Goosebumps” was Rated R!

    I’ve been looking forward to Jason Eisener’s ‘Kid’s vs. Aliens’ since I heard the ‘Hobo With a Shotgun’ director was making a feature length film based on his awesome short horror segment in V/H/S/ 2. Granted it’s been a long time since I’ve seen it, I remember really digging the concept and execution of it. The…

  • Crazy 80s Aussie Rock Opera: SONS OF STEEL!

    I’ve been stating lately here that I’m just not a big fan of movie musicals. BUT perhaps the type of musicals I’ve seen my entire life just don’t bring the fucking goods to the dance floor! I recently viewed 1988’s Australian musical oddity ‘Sons of Steel’ at a double feature movie night & paired it…

  • The PREDATOR is Back….But Maybe Too Damn Soon!

    So there’s s new trailer out for the next chapter of the Predator saga. I should be fuckin’ pumped on this news right? I mean the 1st R rated movie I ever saw in theaters was Predator, one that I snuck into way back in the late eighties before I was of legsl age. It…

  • Hunks, Babes & Ass Kickin’ in Prison: 1990’s CAGED FURY on MOVIE MELT!!

    Are you ready for ass kickin’ HUNKS, sexy BABES, Prison Drama, M. Night Shyamalan style twists and Erik Estrada’s incredible on camera booger? Well then look no further because we just showcased 1990’s CAGED FURY on the latest episode of MOVIE MELT!  Yes we decide to get deep into the corrupt prison system of Caged…

  • V-FORCE Trailer: Low Budget Superheroes vs. Billy Zane in PDX!

    Well I just discovered that ‘V-Force: New Dawn of V.I.C.T.O.R.Y.’ a superhero flick that was filming way back in 2017 here in Portland Oregon has finally got a trailer up! Why do I care about some low grade superhero movie that’s been in post production hell for nearly four years? Well, one of it’s scenes…

  • The Wolf of Snow Hollow: Scooby-Doo Meets ‘The Howling’!

    Yes it’s 2021 and I’ve STILL got the old skool big red envelope Netflix by mail service! Deal with it peeps! In fact the DVD service is so much more superior and satisfying than the boring vanilla streaming service I suggest everyone go back to simpler times and try waiting a few days for a…

  • Spielberg’s Awesome WTF Sequel Treatment – ‘E.T. 2: NOCTURNAL FEARS’!

    I’ve joked with friends for many years about Steven Spielberg’s classic film E.T. having a sequel made, that was only released for audiences overseas. I mean of course I’d want a sequel to the movie, but not some pile of shit that’s made today where they fuck everything up with bad “special” overblown fx, a…

  • The MCU Meets The DCEU: The TRUE Secret of the Multiverse Movies?!

    I’ve got a prediction here, and remember peeps you heard it HERE first at my measly little “hobby blog” (as John Campea would call it), that it’s no coincidence that BOTH the MCU & The DCEU’s new agenda seems to be the “multiverse” idea. I mean the MCU casting supposedly three different Spider-man actors from…

  • VHS Box Art: Demon Cop, Psycho Cop & Maniac Cop-ALL too Relevant.

    Times are crazy, amidst the pandemic something even more sinister has certainly arisen, a true tragedy involving once again United States law enforcement. It seems the cops are being exposed again as true corrupt enemies of the people and more importantly the poor and African Americans seem to be those most hurt by them. Here…

  • A Bold Look at Wolverine’s Weirdest Wildest Hairstyles!!

    Wolverine’s easily one of my all time favorite comic characters & lately I’ve been thinking about the possibility of him entering the MCU and how I hope they go a different direction than the hunky handsome Hugh Jackman version. Don’t get me wrong I like Hugh in the role but this time I hope they…