Tagged: Black Widow

Cinematic Captain America: The Greatest American……..Virgin?!

I’ve been thinking about this since I saw Captain America: The Winter Soldier in theaters, it’s like a big elephant in the room at this point! We just have to address this, the movie Captain America is most definitely still a gosh darn virgin!! Am I wrong?! Nope! Movie Cap was born in 1918 so technically he’s a 96 year old virgin-It’s been three movies that this Cap portrayed by Chris Evans has been in, one being The Avengers and thus far Cap, though quite popular with the ladies since he got his muscles, has gotten ZERO action, aside from a few random smooches! Daaang!

So I think a great plot point of the next Captain America movie must be him finally losing his damn virginity already! I could see this being an incredibly funny moment being discussed by him and his fellow Avengers at a bar over a few beers and I can already imagine a ton of jokes involving Tony Stark, Banner and Thor about this. Now though the bigger question is who’s going to be his first?! Let’s face it Cap is quite the goody two shoes, so he may benefit from a more edgy lady like The Black Widow, or could go old school with Agent Carter (well that might be a bit weird), or maybe he’ll hook up with that SHIELD agent he was talking about?

The Avengers are in serious need of some options for the guy, Black Widow is hot and all but let’s face it she’d tear this momma’s boy’s heart to shreds! Or maybe Cap hasn’t come out of the closet yet?! Maybe he and Bucky will hook up?!! Either way it’s been too many decades for the guy, he’s gotta be feeling some serious sexual frustration at this point with all that super soldier serum pumping him up too, whatever the case he better make sure the big moment is worth the wait….

"Uggh...I can't focus on a word Fury is saying with this raging boner I've had since we made out in that mall earlier!!"

“Uggh…I can’t focus on a word Fury is saying with this raging boner I’ve had since we made out in that mall earlier!!”

Power…Courage…A Prerequisite for the Spiral Zone!

Growing up there were so many cool cartoons. One that always caught this Dorks attention, and remains one of the lesser followed/known is the Spiral Zone. Airing in 1987-88, Spiral Zone was the Trademarked to Tonka toys and ran for 65 episodes. In the end, the series was a financial flop on the part of Tonka, so it appeared they never wanted the light of day to shine upon this great creation ever again. Until recently, the only episodes available for viewing was a small collection of 6 episodes released on VHS by Tonka. Well one man’s love for the series and his shear tenacity shined through to provide a new 8 disc DVD set collecting all of the original episodes!

Spiral Zone Logo

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Amazing Comic Haul from Goodwill Today!

Today was a day unlike any other.

For the last year or so, I have been determined to collect and read the entire West Coast Avengers run. Well, a stop at the Goodwill yielded about 30% of it.

That’s right, I found issues #7-45 (save the issues that I already had, like John Byrne’s Vision Quest Arc) along with a dozen other gems such as the complete run of 1986-87’s Comet Man, Some Black Widow goodness courtesy of Marvel Fanfare, some X-Tinction Agenda issues as well as a couple of Typhoid Mary’s early Daredevil appearances!!

This store (off McLaughlin just outside of Portland), had 3 long boxes full of 1980’s goodness. Many interesting DC titles (that confuse me but are probably great reads) and even a copy of The Dark Night Returns.

At .49 a copy, I felt like I was robbing them, I’ve had a smile on my face all day since!