Here we are with some quick comic book reviews from my haul at the shop this week! If I had a million bucks I’d be reading or testing so many more, but these books add up quickly at 4 bones each! So let’s get started here!
T’was a good week at the Comic book shop! Let me know if there’s any other titles worthy of the 4 bucks a pop drop!!!
So today we got the news that Hugh Jackman and James Mangold will be back for another solo Wolverine adventure. I say this is good news overall as “The Wolverine” was actually pretty decent until it’s out of place cartoony finale. It was a solid PG-13 attempt at telling a classic yet highly altered Wolverine movie comic book adaptation taken from the legendary Chris Claremont / Frank Miller limited series from 1982. They almost pulled it off too, until in the film’s final act when Mangold suddenly remembered he was making a Hollywood blockbuster and shoved a giant robot version of The Silver Samurai down our throats….uggh…Hollywood can really be the pits sometimes.
So anyway I’ve put together five classic Wolverine stories from the comic books that should be contenders for the next movie. At this point it’s common knowledge they’ll butcher some part of the story, but hey a guy can dream right? So listen up all you Hollywood numbskulls cause here at Universal Dork you’ll get my guidance toward making a movie that Wolverine flick fans deserve. Before I start the list though let me set up a few rules for the next flick.
First make this damn installment “Rated R”! The fans have spoken, we want some blood and guts in the next film. I wanna see him slice some people’s arms off, cut people in half ect ect. There’s no way a guy with adamantium claws wouldn’t cause a complete bloodbath while in battle. So give us some realism this time. Second let’s keep the story and visuals consistent if it’s gonna be cartoony then keep the whole flick that way, don’t insert some cartoon bullshit into an otherwise serious storyline. Keep with the tone of the movie. Lastly lets keep it character driven, keep it personal and let’s not get too many other characters or mutants in the mix, the last film was good in this way. Wolverine wasn’t saving the world, he was on a personal mission. These stories are where he works best, as a loner, when he’s out in the real world, drinkin’ at the bar and some serious shit goes down. Ok now onto my plot suggestions:
#5. Old Man Logan- This was quite an interesting modern Wolverine storyline and since Jackman is getting a bit older this might be a great one to make into a movie. However there could be some problems as The Hulk and Hawkeye are owned now by Disney. Perhaps they could settle on something that’d make it possible for these characters to cross over? Or Maybe this movie could be filmed in 10 years from now when Jackman is truly age appropriate for the story line. A futuristic Wolverine story with Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye would be pretty awesome and of course seeing Logan take on The Hulk would be quite a treat as well!!
#4. Kitty Pryde and Wolverine: Movie based on the 1984 mini-series could be a great sequel to “The Wolverine” as it takes Logan and Kitty Pryde who would of course be played by Ellen Page, who’s already stated she wants to make a solo film of her character from the movies, on an adventure together. So what better way to do this than add Jackman into the mix and kill two birds with one stone? Continue reading
It’s now the new year YAY! 2015. Everyone has now felt the heavy hangover that comes along with New Years once again. Everyone attended parties and got wild and crazy! So lately I’ve been thinking about my favorite superheroes and if I were throw a party, just which of them I’d invite. It’s an interesting idea figuring out who’d get an invitation and as much as I love The Incredible Hulk he’s the last guy you want at the party. First off Banner would be a total bore, that is unless he got pissed off, then you’d have real trouble on your hands! Plus imagine The Hulk wasted, it’d be nearly impossible to have a conversation with his already limited vocabulary! People like Captain America and Superman can stay home too, drink milk and nibble on cookies because the last thing you need at a party are a coupla’ goody two-shoes!
So just who the hell are the best of the best to party down with? Well use my guide next year and make sure these superhumans are on the A-list! They’re certain to provide plenty of entertainment to any party! So let’s get started!
Number 10. Iron Man
Who the hell doesn’t want a rich playboy at their party? Hell, Tony Stark is one of the most famous alcoholics in comic book history! He also could fund the entire thing himself for you, and bring al of his hot ladyfriends along with him to really liven things up. The only problem could be that Tony may not know when to quit and could end up lingering at your house far into the afternoon of the next day. You’d have to be careful because he’d most likely be the guy who’d have you back partying in the A.M. leaving you with a heavy week long hangover to recover from. Bottom line Stark just don’t know when to quit!
Also just make sure he’s not depressed, he’s known to be quite an annoying drunk when he’s down and out. Invite with caution!
Number 9. The Sandman
What? You didn’t know ol’ Sandy was a party animal? You betcha, though he’s a bit of a rogue he’s a great guy to invite to the party! He’ll come equipped with a bunch of interesting stories and he’s always willing to bring the beer! Little known fact the Sandman is a drinking bud of Ben Grimm and has even visited Grimm in the hospital….with a bunch of beer! Sandman is a good guy to know but a bit of a wild card, he’ll be a lot of fun but you may have to keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn’t steal your cash from outta your wallet while you’re taking a leak!
Number 8. The Badger
Yep this guy will most definitely make your party interesting and he’s from my home state of Wisconsin to boot. Badger is quite an interesting character who just so happens to love partying! Being from the land of cheese he’s quite able and willing to down as much beer as you can put in front of him but he also has multiple personalities, lives with a Wizard named “Ham” and has an odd habit of calling everyone “Larry”. He also can speak to animals so if you have any pets you can be rest assured that they’ll have a great time as well! He’s probably the only superhero who’s played tug a war with Spuds MacKenzie for a beer. The only problem is he’s completely bat shit crazy-wait is that a problem?
Number 7. She-Hulk
Hell yeah we need some female energy at the party for sure and why the heck shouldn’t it be She-Hulk? She’s super funny, a total babe and incredibly flirtatious! You know she’s gonna show up to the party dressed to impress too!
Plus she can drink any party bro under the table but watch out cuz she’s been known to hit on guys pretty hard too after drinking a bit too much, just check out how she threw herself on The Thing! Dang this would not fly in 2018!
I love to see new villains created for comic books today, but I won’t lie here. I really like it when some weird ass old D-lister from who knows when re-emerges onto the scene with a vengance into a current title. It always brings a smile to my face and sometimes the villain hits the big time graduating to the B-list or sometimes even the A-list level. So I began to think about a handful of villains from the yesteryears of my youth and decided that these guys need another chance to shine. Now I am not one hundred percent positive that all these guys haven’t made a more recent appearance, as I obviously can’t afford to read every title out there (Hint! Hint! Any of you comic companies want to send me promo comics for review?!!) but I am pretty damn sure this first group of villains have been pretty silent for quite some time so here are the first five that came to mind!
1. Shadow Stalker
This master assassin is probably my favorite on this list. He’s a super old school villain from “The Master of Kung Fu” series back in the 1970’s. He often time battled Shang-Chi and was one of his major enemies way back when. He’s definitely a weird ass character, which is probably why I like the dude so damn much! There’s really not much known about this guy, he hides in shadows with his yellow skin and kicks major ass with his morning star-hair.
A previous Shang-chi villain, Razorfist, who is from around that same era is now a pretty popular nemesis to Wolverine. Razorfist was also a fave of mine, so how about sending Shadow Stalker after Wolverine next time he travels to Madripoor? I’d pay to see that!
2. The Missing Link
This largely forgotten villain of The Incredible Hulk need to get back onto the smashing circuit again and knock some sense back into him! This guy was once a “neanderthaloid” from long ago who survived in a pocket beneath the earth by some unknown means. During atomic testing in China the pocket he survived in was ruptured and he was affected by the bombing, later returning to the surface as a radioactive monster! There he was handed over to the Russians who launched him into the New York Harbor where he raised hell.
This was the beginning of his battling the Hulk where he for a short time established himself as a major adversary. But where has The Missing Link been lately? I say it’s time for this guy to come back as a major contender and start some serious meddling in the affairs of Banner & The Incredible HULK!
3. Hammer & Anvil
These guys were pretty cool I always thought at least, however when villains in the 1980’s were killed by Scourge it wasn’t exactly a good sign of their popularity! Their story is also pretty unique “Leroy “Hammer” Jackson was an African-American prisoner said to hate everyone and everything. As part of a chain gang, he was chained to a white racist named Johnny Anvil. The pair’s hatred of prison, however, was stronger than their hate for each other and they succeeded in escaping the chain gang while still chained together. Hammer stole a .38 handgun from a guard, and when the two encountered an alien who had crashed on Earth, Hammer tried to kill it but accidentally wound up saving the creature’s life instead; it fed on metal, and used the bullets fired at it to regenerate. The alien wanted to thank them, and replaced the chain linking them with a device that granted them superhuman powers. The two returned to prison seeking revenge, but wound up battling the Hulk instead.”
Yeah that’s what their Wiki page had to say do you really need any other reason to see these guys back in action? I didn’t think so! I think The Wrecking Crew needs to have these guys join their gang-how cool would that be? Granted they’d need a good makeover most likely but power them up and and have them raise some havoc again!
Yes Wyre is a D-lister from 1992 with an B-List background. He’s not very well known from his appearances in The Alpha Flight where his main nemesis was Wild Child, who at the time was a bit of a D-lister himself before he more recently graduated as a major villain of Wolverine. The Canadian mutant Wyre, much like Wolverine is a bit more of an anti hero, and actually has tangled with Logan before. He appeared back in 1992 and has genetically modified wires that can stretch from his body which he controls with his mind as well as a similar healing factor. His main mission was to take down members of a feral group of assassin called the Breed who were created from his DNA and quite possibly his hairy ass chest!
I think Wyre needs a good makeover obviously but given his background he could prove to be a major player in Wolverine’s world perhaps even resurfacing with information or a death wish again for Wild Child and Roumulus?
This guy should be back causing serious trouble for the Hulk! He first appeared in the The Incredible Hulk #334 back in the eighties and later in issue #342 he kills himself. As far as I know that’s the last we have seen of the psychotic gamma zombie. Half-life was pretty awesome actually aside from being really creepy looking he’d start out looking like a green zombie with a sylish 80’s hair-do and absorbing life from living creatures to become more “normal” looking.
When the Leader employed him to take down The Hulk he drained him so badly that ol’ jade jaws was not much more than a walking pile of skin and bones. I see no reason why Half-Life can’t come back, perhaps revived by The Leader? He’s a great classic Hulk villain that needs to step back into the spotlight-zombies are all the rage right now and a gamma powered zombie is ten times as awesome!
I have been thinking about this for a while now, do I really want to see another Hugh Jackman Wolverine on the big screen? To be honest I’m not too sure I do anymore. I’m really not very excited about the Spider-man reboot to be honest and I’m quite not sure why? The last Spider-man movie was terrible, in fact I am not sure looking back how much I really like any of them anymore. I guess I just see more of the same for the movie Spider-man and I guess I’ll just have to wait and see the film in order to get excited.
New is it seems that shooting for the Wolverine sequel is set to begin in August in Australia. Hugh Jackman claims it will be better than the first film. Hmmm…well it really won’t take much to be better than that and hearing him say that isn’t exactly building the hype machine for the flick. Personally I think it may be time for someone new to take over the character. Start fresh. I’m having a tough time erasing the last two films he portrayed our favorite berserker in, they plague my mind often and when I think about them they often put me into a state of rabid dork rage!
Now first I must clarify I really do love Jackman as Wolverine. When I first saw him as the character it gave me the chills! Aside from being too tall, he was the perfect man for the job. Unfortunately when Singer left the X-Men to make a very bland Superman flick things took a serious turn into Shit-Sandwich-ville. By the time we reached X-men Origins: Wolverine we were sinking into a swamp of turds with no redemption anywhere in sight! To me I just CAN’T sit through another shitty Wolverine movie. Since I was young I always dreamed of a solo Wolverine movie and look what I got after all the years of waiting. It’s just not fair to Wolverine that Batman got Christopher Nolan. So now here we are another Wolvie movie in the works. I personally hope it falls through again. I then hope Marvel reboots the shit out of it!
It’s time to move on. Jackman was great but we just can’t erase the past here people. It’s like a girlfriend or Boyfriend who cheats on you, sometimes it just can’t ever be the same! That’s how I feel. My advice is start fresh. Don’t put him in any of the X-men films for a while. Start Solo. Get a great director who understands and loves the character. Let’s get gritty. This time let’s see what it really looks like when a mutant with Adamantium blades gets pissed off. Let’s see Wolverine slice and dice like he does in the comics. No more PG-13. It’s time for an R-rated Wolverine movie. Start the film off when he’s found in Canada by James & Heather Hudson just after the Weapon X experimentation or like the upcoming movie in Japan only based on the Frank Miller / Claremont mini series of the eighties.
Now with that out of the way there’s just one big problem, who could possibly play Wolverine this time around? How do you all feel about Jackman as Wolverine again? Are you excited?
So of course we all know that DC usually follows the trends of Marvel Comics. They always have really, so it’s natural with Marvel getting all this media attention again (first in 1992) with their character Northstar and his recent gay marriage announcement that DC would have to jump on the bandwagon and reveal that a “major” character from their roster would be coming out of the closet. People began to wonder who?! Batman? Superman? Swamp Thing (now that would have been impressive!)? Robin? Green Lantern?!! Well it ended up being Green Lantern as you all know, which on the surface sounds impressive, wow Hal Jordan is GAY?!! DC wasn’t fuckin’ around!
Well that is the case unless you read the fine print, see this is the Original Green Lantern, Alan Scott from back in 1940, he hasn’t been a major character for quite sometime until now really. Let’s not forget this new gay version of Scott is a character in an alternate universe “Earth 2” who’s a reboot of the original much much less popular version of the Lantern. Plus there are like a thousand other Green Lanterns out there already the way it is. So are you still impressed? I have to say no.
One could easily argue that Marvel’s Northstar is not a major player, it’s not like Wolverine is getting hitched to Hank Mccoy or anything. However when John Byrne created Northstar he knew he was gay from the start, however it took Marvel all the way until 1992 to reveal.
If you read Alpha Flight from the beginning it’s pretty obvious that Northstar, one of Marvel’s biggest dick’s (no I don’t mean it that way), was clearly gay or at the very least not interested in women in the least.
Check out the full scoop on Northstar’s history of creation in this older post I did. So DC you managed to get people’s attention but next time let’s be just a little more daring!
Well not sure if you’ve all been keeping up with The Astonishing X-men lately but one of my favorite characters recently rejoined the team – Alpha Flight’s Northstar. As you all know he is easily the most popular and was the first openly gay superhero. Marvel is seeming to try and make history again with issue #50 of Astonishing X-men as he proposes to his boyfriend Kyle in a Bryant Park in NYC.
The only problem is he gets rejected! Then in the same day it appears that his bf is kidnapped by an evil unseen nemesis the same one we assume that has been controlling The Marauders (yeah the guys from the historic Mutant Massacre of the 80’s are back). Anyway it appears that at the end of the issue Northstar is going to have to take down Wolverine and Gambit as they are now also under the control. But don’t fret everyone because in a rather lame move Marvel has already shown us the cover of issue #51 where we see Northstar & Kyle getting hitched!
An amazing cover with all his buddies from Alpha Flight and the X-men gathered around them. Well all I have to say is it’s about time Northstar! Kudos to Marvel too who to my knowledge will go down in history with the first Gay superhero (who’s actually an awesome character) and now the first Gay Superhero Marriage!
Being a huge Alpha Flight fan I was somewhat saddened by the news today that Alpha Flight is no longer going to be an ongoing series as recently announced. It seems that all we are going to get right now is the recent limited series which was for the most part a pretty fun solids ride. It was great to have all the original characters back again-and even better that Major Maple Leaf was no where in sight! Still however I think that Alpha Flight could have been and should have been even better this time around.
It seems to me that no one can make it quite as interesting as the original series by John Byrne. Heck we even got Wolverine making a cameo in this last run-yeah yeah I know Wolverine is everywhere these days, but one place he really needs to be is Alpha Flight as he was once a member and has a crazy history with the group. I for one think he needs to quit the Avengers and hell maybe even the X-men and head back to his roots in Canada. How awesome would that be? Become a full fledged member again? At the very very least I think there should be a series, much like the current Captain America & Bucky, that chronicles his past with the team from when Mac and Heather Hudson (his other red headed obsession) found him. How about that Marvel?
Either way I am pretty disappointed Marvel went back on their decision to make Alpha a mainstay monthly. From what I hear in the latest issue though is that two Alpha members are going to make a major impact on the X-universe. My guess is it’s Northstar and Aurora, but they quite honestly have had their chance, Northstar already was a member of the X-men and Aurora part of the Weapon X series….My hope would be for Sasquatch, Puck or Snowbird. Either way I hold hope someday someone will truly do justice to the team as their stories could be right up there with any superhero team around today! Long Live Alpha Flight!!
So I just got done reading the brand new Alpha Flight 0.1 and it was a pretty nice re-introduction to the original team! It had some real great artwork by Ben Oliver and Dan Green and a great cover which brought back memories of John Byrne. What really would have been great would have been if they could have actually got Byrne to draw this new series(check out the amazing pick below by Byrne). So far so good here as we get a pretty interesting idea of some sort of political turmoil in Canada as their elections are about to begin and a new party called Unity is revealed. I am assuming that Unity leader must win the election and somehow turn the country against Alpha Flight? We’ll see I guess!
Anyway the whole resurrected cast is here, well sorta… Continue reading