Tagged: 2020

Will JESSE “The Body” VENTURA Body Slam Joe Biden & Suplex Trump in 2020?!

It’s an election year and things are sorta’ heating up here now that we have come down to just TWO candidates for the 2020 race. However it’s clear that once again we have two questionable people to choose from, the ridiculously terrible and uninspiring Republican President Donald Trump and now also the ridiculously terrible and uninspiring Democrat former Vice President Joe Biden!! Yes folks AND both of these guys have also been accused of being sexual Predators too! At this point it almost feels like a requirement here in the USA to be some sort of creep to run for public office, but hey that’s what we’re dealing with here in the good ol’ USA in the midst of the #metoo movement, go figure huh?

Well I posted a few weeks back, that former pro wrestling legend, mayor, governor, navy seal, 80’s action star Jesse Ventura was mulling the idea of jumping into the race with the Green Party for a Presidential run. Unfortunately it quickly was revealed that he’d decided against doing it. He’d have been a great addition to the race to get a second shot at defeating a Predator again or in this case two potential Predators! In the past couple days though I’ve seen the talk of his presidential run start coming back into the 2020 narrative yet again.

It seems his wife at the moment has potentially serious medical problems and they’re waiting for test results to see if she’ll be ok. The word is that if she ends up alright Jesse Ventura may still jump into the 2020 race. Anyway there’s a movement that just started called #draftjesse and there’s also a website: peopleforjesse.com where you can send him a message if you wanna see him run in 2020! Also a very strange tidbit of bizarre foreshadowing, as we know Matt Groening’s ‘The Simpsons’ & ‘Futurama’ have both oddly predicted things that in the future indeed came true- so check this out, as we see in an episode of Futurama, a President Jesse Ventura head in a jar in the background with other former Presidents! Seriously weird, maybe Matt Groening who’s been called a possible real life “time traveler” knows something we all don’t…..YET. Check it out.

In the meantime check out this video on why the Democrats and Republicans should fear him if he gets in the race! One thing is definitely certain at this point we deserve more options in 2020!!!

Bonkers Brazillian Supernatural Slasher Trailer: ‘SKULL: The MASK’!

I’ve been looking around for interesting movies during the lockdown and this one definitely looks like it’s got potential if you’re into crazy gooey practical fx and supernatural slashers. ‘Skull: The Mask’ comes from Brazil and the trailer looks pretty damn promising!

We follow the story of an ancient relic in the from of a creepy ass mask that turns it’s wearer into a rampaging maniac that looks like he just had a successful audition for GWAR!

“In the year 1944, an artifact is used in a military experiment. The artifact is the Mask of Anhangá, the executioner of Tahawantinsupay, a Pre-Columbian God. The experience fails. Nowadays, the Mask arrives at Sao Paulo. The Mask possesses a body and starts to commit visceral sacrifices on vengeance for the incarnation of its God, initiating a blood bath. The policewoman Beatriz Obdias is in charge of the crimes, challenging her beliefs”

Check this one out Horror hounds it looks like a ton of fun!

Movie Review: Old Dudes STILL Kick Ass in VFW!!!

I just checked out VFW, the latest from director Joe Begos (Almost Human, The Mind’s Eye) who returns with, in my opinion his best film yet! This sweet little gritty love letter to John Carpenter, which calls back to his classic ‘Assault on Precinct 13’ in big way, is also a blood soaked love letter to some older actors/action stars of yesteryear. We’ve got icons Fred Williamson, William Sadler, Stephen Lang, Martin Kove & even George Wendt from ‘Cheers’ to make this bar room brawl even more authentic!

The story kicks off on a special birthday night for VFW bar owner “Fred” and his tight knit gang of bad ass war veterans. The evening quickly turns into wild all-out battle for their lives when a teen punk rock girl crashes their party with a sack full of ‘hype’. This new drug basically turns people into demented maniacs, with a hunger for more hype at any cost. The evil punk drug dealer, desperate to get his valuable stash back, sends his gang of gnarly addicts on a rampage to get it back. When these mutant punks on a rampage storm the bar looking for the teen, the old vets along with a younger soldier get to relive the gory glory years of war one more time. They unleash their pent of rage and fury using every weapon they can get their hands on to protect the girl and try annihilate the horde of drug addled maniacs. However these messed up punks have hype running through their veins and want more, risking anything to their grimy paws on it.

If you’re a fan of old school action flicks from the 70’s & 80’s you’re going to really get a kick out of VFW. The gore is pretty over the top, done in a such a cartoony way that people literally explode on screen. As a fan of practical fx Begos always delivers the goods with some wild splatter, he also keeps the vibe placed firmly in the golden days of the action era, with not a cell phone in sight. It also feels like an 80’s flick, with stunning neon lit sets within the walls of the cool old dank dive bar.

The real highlight of this is the cast of old codgers who do the majority of the ass kickin’. It’s absolutely delightful to see the likes of Fred Williamson & The Karate Kid’s Martin “Sensei” Kove in full on action mode as well as Stephen Lang, William Sadler and the younger soldier played by Tom Williamson. They’re all great here and give this film the cred it deserves proving age is just a number when it comes to cinematic butt kicking. I really enjoyed VFW, it’s the perfect modern midnite movie and gets so much praise for bringing in some old icons into the mix of onscreen mayhem. Check this out if you’re a fan of 70’s/80’s cult action horror flicks- And here’s to hoping VFW gets a sequel bringing even more of the bar’s patrons into the fold, hand picking some more old nearly forgotten bad asses to do some damage one last time! 

Jesse “The BODY” Ventura: “MAYBE” Running for Prez Yet AGAIN?!

Well it seems this last week brought some new speculation for the 2020 Presidential race! Yes folks, Jesse “The Body” Ventura announced that he’s “testing the waters” with the Green Party for a possible run for President this year. Sounds exciting huh? Well to be fair this is probably the closest the former wrestler/Governor/mayor/Navy Seal/action star has ever come to actually committing to doing it. Over the years he’s teased the idea over and over saying he’ll “maybe” do it. Of course he’s back again saying “maybe”, which seems almost like it’s his campaign slogan at this point?!

Anyway if he does do it, it’d surely be quite a spectacle to behold and he really might shake things up a bit, who knows maybe he could even win? No matter where you stand politically I think we can all agree we need more choices in our elections, as Jesse says “in the USA we have one more choice than a dictatorship” regarding the two party system. For the moment I’m intrigued and it seemed like the perfect opportunity to share this amazing video put out around the time of the 2016 election. James Adomian is a master impersonator, know mostly for his impression of Bernie Sanders. Here he captures the spirit of Jesse once again saying a strong hard “MAYBE” for 2020!!!

    

Movie Reviews: Shatner Kills Demons with a Bazooka?! Killer Clowns from Wisconsin?!

I headed out to the local video store the other night (yeah in Portland we still got an amazing one called Movie Madness) to rent some movies, just like we used to do back in the good ol’ days. Let’s face it folks, sometimes it’s nice to take a break from the bland streaming services like Netflix and physically roam around a video store in hopes of stumbling across something entertaining. I decided this time I’d check out some new stuff I haven’t seen streaming out there.

First up was ‘Gags The Clown’ a movie I’d wanted to check out for quite some time now, being a Wisconsin native for much of my life & knowing this horror flick takes place in Green Bay (a place I’d personally hung out so many times in my teens & twenties) made this a no brainer rental. The cover art alone is pretty awesome and would look lovely gracing an old VHS.

Anyway I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not a giant fan of “found footage” horror movies and it’s been pretty played out these days in my opinion at least. But in this case I was lured in mainly because I’m just downright intrigued by movies made in ‘The Dairy state’. So the idea of ‘Gags’ was inspired by the whole creepy clown roaming the streets in real life viral video phenomenon a few years or so back. The interesting thing here is that creator of ‘Gags’ actually took advantage of this using his character to supposedly fool local Green Bay residents and the local news to report on it, eventually gathering up some worldwide interest in the creepy clown. A pretty brilliant marketing move to say the least. Continue reading

It’s The Perfect Time for ‘The Great Lakes AVENGERS’ to Enter the MCU!

True Believers, it’s never been a more perfect time for the ‘Great Lakes Avengers’ to make their grand entrance into the MCU! Ok, I know many of you casual Marvel movie fanatics out there are likely wondering just who and what the hell I’m talking about, but the “GLA” as they’re also referred to have been around since the late 80’s and have on a couple occasions attempted to actually replace The Avengers, most notably when they tragically disassembled in 2004 in the comics. The Milwaukee, Wisconsin based team are most well known as the ultimate gang of blundering misfit superheroes and when the Avengers disbanded they figured they’d simply take the mantle of the team for themselves to reap all the glory for themselves. Of course they quickly found out they weren’t quite qualified when it came down to taking out major threats to the planet. So why introduce these guys now into the MCU huh?

Well at the current moment in the movies The Avengers aren’t really a thing anymore, at least for the moment. With Cap old & retired and Tony Stark dead, it’d be the perfect time to check out the origin story and rise of ‘The Great Lakes Avengers’. In fact with the ‘Disney+’ streaming service there’s the platform needed to tell their ridiculously madcap story. Since 1989 when writer/artist John Byrne introduced the underdog team to the Marvel Universe (West Coast Avengers #46), I’ve been a big fan. In fact I listed them before as one of the obscure Marvel teams I thought would make a great movie or better yet today a comedic Disney+ series after the success of the D-listers The Guardians of the Galaxy. To me the team has so much more potential than GOG, with their origin story alone being a helluva good adventure, if even at times more of a dark comedy.

The name of the team alone would spark immediate interest and originally back in the comic books they’d even been coached by Hawkeye and Mockingbird who desperately tried to whip them into shape. You could even have Jeremy Renner make a cameo in an episode as Hawkeye to do just that. Considering the team’s ranks were filled from a classified ad in the newspaper would open the door to so many great comedic scenarios as well.

Then there’s the team themselves, which consists of Mr. Immortal, a mutant with a super-superhuman healing factor and the ability to survive the most gruesome deaths, Bertha who’s the most popular fashion icon in Milwaukee WI who has the ability to bulk up like the Blob, Dinah-soar the flying female reptilian, Doorman a mutant who can create doorways using alternate universes to pass through solid objects and finally Flatman, the team’s current leader & openly gay two dimensional version of Reed Richards. But wait the team was also home to the now iconic Squirrel Girl and this would be the perfect place for her to make her official MCU debut!

This team and their story would make for the perfect superhero series, there’s so many interesting angles to explore. From forming the team, to training to be the new “Avengers”, to their many failed missions and their attempt to square off against a real superhuman threat. There’s something truly charming about exploring an underdog group of down on their luck superhuman characters. The comedy practically writes itself and they’d be a surefire win in a series of their own as there’s nothing quite like them out there yet. So what do you think? Do you think now’s the time for this weird-o gang of midwest superheroes to enter into the fold?! If I’ve peaked your interest a good launch point of the team is the six issue mini series from Dan Slott from 2005 called “GLA: Misassembled”, I think that would be a perfect blueprint for a Disney+ series….

Badass Seniors vs Mutant Punks: Who Dares Enter The VFW?!!

I’m pretty damn excited about the upcoming horror survival flick VFW from Joe Begos, who’s already got some pretty sweet modern horror movies under his belt like ‘Almost Human’ & ‘The Mind’s Eye’. VFW shows the same promise but this time with a stellar cast, the likes of Martin Kove, Fred Williamson, Stephen Lang & Cheer’s own barstool regular George Wendt. A lazy crew of old codger war veterans have their usual evening of drinkin’ abruptly interrupted when their beloved VFW hall comes under attack by a vicious gang of punks, who’re fully jacked up on a powerful new drug called ‘the hype’.

 

So far this looks like a modern cult classic and it’s so cool when a newer director showcases some of the genre’s older largely forgotten heros in inventive new ways. VFW also features Bego’s regular Graham Skipper who always does a stellar job. It looks like it’s going for a John Carpenter ‘Assault on Precinct 13’ type of vibe here, except with more over the top gore and with each movie this director does, his chops improve greatly, I’ve still yet to see his 2019 release ‘Bliss” but it’s definitely on my radar as well. VFW is set for release on Feb 14th 2020, can’t wait to check this out as it’s definitely one of my most anticipated!     

U-Dork Politics: Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura to Run for Prez in 2020?!!

Ok so I don’t normally cover politics much here at Universal Dork and I really don’t plan to in the future! However I heard recently that former 80’s icon wrestler, action hero, Navy Seal and former Governor of Minnesota Jesse “The Body” Ventura is considering a run for President in 2020 with The Green Party. This upcoming election year could get a lot more interesting as Ventura is well known for not holding back his political views….whether you like em’ or not. For me Ventura’s been a big part of my childhood, I mean the guy starred in some totally awesome movies like Predator, The Running Man, Demolition Man & the largely unseen but awesome ‘Tag Team’ with Roddy Piper. Oh yeah and for those bad movie fanatics he also starred in Abraxas!

Anyway, in the last few days he’s been starting to talk once again about running for President in 2020, some months back he was asked at an airport by TMZ about it and had a few brash words for Trump if he runs, but then hasn’t mentioned the possible 2020 run again until now. Politically he’s always been an independent and has devoted a lot time presenting arguments on why The Democrats & Republicans are the true source of many of the country’s problems.

His political leanings are similar to Bernie Sanders in many ways and he’s always claimed if you are given a chance to debate the Democrats and The Republicans you can indeed beat them. He states they keep out all other political parties for a reason, so the two can continue on their two party dictatorship. I’d love to see Ventura enter the race, in this most recent interview he described Donald Trump as a “draft dodging coward” and I’d love to see that presented to Trump face to face in a damn debate!

Ventura’s an interesting guy for sure, many know him for heavily researching conspiracy theories and his most recent book ‘Jesse Ventura’s Marijuana Manifesto‘ favors the 100% legalization of cannabis across the USA. I’ve been intrigued by Jesse since I was a kid watching the WWF and Predator was the first R-rated movie I saw and snuck into in the theater. So yeah I’m ready for “The Body” to enter the 2020 field with The Greens if he’s really serious about it that is. If anything it’d be one helluva spectacle to behold! The Green Party has had zero luck getting the attention needed to be allowed onto the debate stage over the years and the hope would be that Ventura could finally generate enough hype in the media that the people would demand to see him included. If Jesse continues speaking with no filter it just very well could indeed happen. Imagine a third or even 4th voice in the debates-I think more perspectives are desperately needed here in the USA. It’s been a while since we got a third voice on a Presidential debate stage (Ross Perot 1992!) and I think if there was anyone out there who could gather enough controversy to be included on one it’d be Jesse “The Body” Ventura! 

Now let’s keep in mind this isn’t the first time he’s mentioned running for prez as the amazing comedian James Adomian clearly shows in this awesome comedy skit about Jesse’s contemplation about the topic!

Comic Review: Will ‘ALPHA FLIGHT: True North’ #1 Energize a New Ongoing Series?!

I just got done reading the ‘ALPHA FLIGHT: True North’ Marvel Comics one shot and it got me a bit excited about the possibility of an ongoing series. Yeah Alpha Flight has been a favorite of mine since I was a kid in 80’s and after the first John Byrne series it’s never been quite the same, so hearing that a new one shot was coming out made me decide to head up to ‘Cosmic Monkey‘, (Portland Oregon’s best comic book shop), to grab a copy and see for myself. It’s been a few years since I bought new comic books, I quit a while back cold turkey, as their just too damn expensive and many of them don’t grab me like they used to honestly. However, Alpha Flight always gets another chance!

So ‘True North’ was a pretty decent little dive back into the lives of the diverse Canadian superhero team, it features three short stories with various members of the team. The first featuring classic Alphans Talisman & Snowbird as they travel to a remote area of in the Arctic Circle to investigate a supernatural presence. It’s an intriguing little tale that could have really spanned the whole issue. I definitely enjoyed the artwork in this one by Max Dunbar as well.

The next story is a small slice of life featuring everyone’s favorite little person badass ‘Puck’ and the fish woman ‘Marina’ as they walk a lonely beach on a sunny day. Puck shares a story from his past and the two of them spend some time bonding. A neat little short overall but I wasn’t a real big fan of the artists depictions of Puck and Marina, who basically just made them look like a short guy and a green woman devoid of most of her fish like qualities. The last story features Heather Hudson aka ‘Vindicator’ as she hides from the Canadian government for crimes committed while under the mental control of long time Alpha Flight villain ‘The Master of the World’. It’s a pretty interesting short story too and also features her husband James ‘Guardian’ Hudson with plenty of underlying relationship drama bubbling below the surface. Overall this one was nice refresher of just what an Alpha Flight ongoing series could feel like in 2019.

The other members were missed though, classics like Sasquatch & Shaman weren’t even in it at all and Northstar and Aurora only spoke a couple lines. I was hoping for a cool one shot with the whole team showing their current relationship as a team, but regardless it was still a pretty good teaser, even if it was priced at whoppin’ 5 bucks! DAMN!! I’ve always thought the team under the right writer again could be developed into a great modern series. The team’s super diverse cast has a lot of rich history to explore. ‘True North’ strikes some good chords but I’m not sure it was really quite compelling enough to drum up the magic needed to push Alpha Flight into a new ongoing series. I’d like to see Wolverine return to the team and maybe bring some drama into Heather and James’ rocky relationship. It’s always been softly suggested he might have some feelings for Heather. You never know! I’m also still hoping for an Alpha Flight movie as well, I think they’d be an instant hit in the MCU!

5 Reasons Why Hollywood’s Summer Blockbuster Franchises are Failing!

So it’s no secret that the summer blockbusters of 2019 have been underperforming at the box office this year, unless you’re a Marvel movie there’s a good chance you just ain’t makin’ the boatloads of easy cash off of eager hungry consumers like you used to!! So far we’ve had some big flops and under performers in theaters this summer, Hellboy, X-men: Dark Phoenix, Men In Black International, Godzilla: King of The Monsters, Shaft and I’m sure a few more flops to come.

It almost seems that after the extravaganza of ‘Avengers: Endgame’ people just ain’t that impressed with what Hollywood’s a pushin’! So what the heck gives here? I’ve got 5 reasons why I think people just ain’t buyin’ what big ol’ Hollywood’s selling!

Bland, Soulless, Predictable & Safe Storytelling

One thing I’ve noticed over the recent years is that these big ass summer blockbusters don’t bring much new to the table, instead of setting trends they now play off of what’s trending on social media etc to try and ensure they make maximum profit. It’s clear to audiences that they’re being marketed to and a lot of the themes we see in current movies feel a bit forced into the narrative. The plot lines feel predictable & safe, being very careful not to push the boundaries. However, nobody likes to feel pandered to, especially just to make a quick buck. Today Hollywood blockbusters feel a bit too calculated, like a Mcdonald’s happy meal version of a movie. It tastes good for a moment but doesn’t provide much real nourishment. These huge movies need to set trends again and take more risks. Most of these stories being told on the big screen now follow a rigid formula, it’s time to shake things up a bit and develop some compelling content that will blow audiences minds & keep them thinking long after they leave the theater.

Cinematic Politics & Social Media Movie Battles

Sure social media can be a cool way to connect with friends all over the world but it’s also caused a major political rift in movie fans, especially online. Everyone has a damn platform and everyone’s ready to state their opinion for the whole world to hear. The landscape of politics (here in the USA at least) is a gigantic mess, people are more than ready to call each other names and insult each others political beliefs any chance they can and then some. If you’ve noticed now there’re Youtube channels whose main focus is to tear down movies that they feel promote left leaning agendas and vice versa. Now we’ve got boycotts & petitions galore that are raging against movies from angry fans who think they’re promoting a threatening political views. We’ve got Hollywood directors & industry people arguing with angry fans on twitter about their movies and political leanings. When a movie’s released people immediately jump in to examine what side of the political spectrum it falls upon & then get bent out of shape about it on their social media platforms. Most claim they want to go to the movies to escape from the worries of today’s society, but people are so divided (and making good profit off that anger on their platforms) these days and I’m not seeing this trend dying down any time soon. At least until we get a new damn President!

Poorly Planned Franchise Reboots & Sequels

There’s a lot of bad, uninspired franchise sequels and reboots out there these days making their way into theaters. Hollywood is trying their hardest to capitalize off of nostalgia these days. It seems they think that if they simply slap say ‘Star Wars’ brand on a movie that it’s gonna mean butts in seats at the cinema. Not the case, people are clearly smarter these days when it comes to their choice of entertainment. Lots of franchises attempting to reboot with younger “hip” stars and leaving the old actors in the dust. I mean what really is ‘Men in Black’ without Will Smith? How about Star Wars with crusty old grumpy Luke Skywalker that barely lifts a finger in the movie? Or the Ghostbusters without any of the original characters starring in it to properly pass the torch? Hollywood is a bit clueless when it comes to how to execute these sequels, fans want to see a respectful portrayal of classic older characters who’re set to pass the torch to younger generation. Some of these reboots/sequels actually seem downright disrespectful to the original characters, sweeping them under the rug as quickly as possible to usher in the new characters. There needs to be a class taught to all of these clueless Hollywood executives on how to successfully pass the torch in a franchise. If you take a crap on a beloved franchise the fans of it will roast your ass on social media. The fans today have more power than ever and it’s a new angle that’s got Hollywood baffled.

Spectacle over Story

It’s kinda crazy now, almost every blockbuster movie franchise has been trying to set up a cinematic universe because they think they can reap the same benefits as the MCU does. However what most of these franchises get wrong is that they simply haven’t spent the time worldbuilding building the way Marvel has over the the last 10 plus years. Most of these failing franchises spend their movie’s runtime trying to set up the next sequels rather than telling a compelling story with top notch character development. Instead they simply litter the movie with a bunch of shiny, glossy CGI & flashy explosions convinced that lone is enough to entice movie goers to get all amped up for their planned spinoffs. Well listen up Hollywood, going to the theaters is expensive and people just aren’t as dumb as you seem to think they are, yeah we got options these days with all the streaming content out there. Movies better step it with their storytelling otherwise we’re gonna stay home! So many of these franchise are dumbed down to a level that just won’t entice the masses like they used to. We want original stories, not rehashed plots from previous movies in the franchise. Sure the spectacle can be fun, but there’s a certain over saturation of mind numbing movies out there now and yours better be more than just fluff. Stop trying to predict what the masses are going to eat up and spend some time writing stories we haven’t already heard. Most of the movies feel like they’ve been looking at what’s trending on twitter and writing a story around that. I’ll say it again, Hollywood needs to set the trends again rather than blindly trying to follow them.

 

Star Power Ain’t What it Used to Be

Back in the 1980’s blockbusters were a just as big a deal but they usually had one thing going for them that’s missing today-star power. People would rush to the movies just to see Stallone or Schwarzennegar do their thing. It was an event. Not so much today, the days of larger than life celebs has somehow died, putting one of the stars of say the Avengers franchise in one doesn’t automatically equally box office gold. I’m not sure what changed over the years but people are far less starstruck than ever before. This means Hollywood has got try even harder to put something out that feels fresh and original, a good cast is still important but it’s clearly NOT a deal breaker anymore.