Universal Dork


Calling ALL Fans of John Carpenter’s ‘THE THING’!! Sign This Petition!! by petersaturday

I’ve bitched and moaned here about my complete and utter disappointment for the 2011 version of ‘The Thing’, the prequel to Carpenter’s classic 1982 monster movie! To refresh your memory we were originally promised a movie that would not only be a prequel but also give us the same style of mind blowing practical creature effects the awed us way back in ’82. Carpenter’s ‘The Thing’ in my opinion is maybe the best creature feature of all time.

Yeah effects wizards at ADI (Amalgamated Dynamics Inc.) spent a ton of time and effort creating some truly astonishing practical creature FX for the movie only to have nearly ALL of them omitted from the final theatrical version of the film. Instead they gave us fans exactly what we DID NOT want, a bunch of slick, fake looking CGI in it’s place. This was a nightmare come true for all fans of the original. Well now it seems that that someone has decided to create a petition directed straight at the CEO of Universal Pictures Ronald Meyer. The petition is asking for what the fans wanted all along, the release of the work print of the 2011 film with all of the original practical monster effects that ADI worked so hard to bring us fans of the original!

This is a superb idea and something i have wondered about for so long. What would that film have looked like in it’s original form? Well now it’s time to demand that we see the film we were promised! If you’ve seen some of the Youtube videos of these FX then you know how incredible this movie just may have been!

So all of you Thing fans out there please take a minute to sign this petition and lets get the version of the prequel we all had been hoping for once and for all you can sign the Change.org petition right HERE! What are you waiting for?!  



Pulse Pounders: Lost Sequels To Charles Band’s Classic Horror Flicks! by petersaturday

I know there’s a select group of people who probably actually care about the films of Charles Band, but to me he’s a legendary dude in the scheme of cheezy horror flicks of the 80’s! So I’m thrilled myself, just to find out about this lost movie called “Pulse Pounders” which was filmed way back in 1987 and has never really seen the light of day! This flick is an anthology, consisting of three tales of “terror” one being an adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft’s The Evil Clergyman starring Jeffrey Combs, the next being a sequel to the movie “Trancers” and the last being a sequel to one of my favorite ridiculously awesome movies of the 80’s The Dungeonmaster which stars Richard Moll & W.A.S.P…….yeah the metal band!

Now the first two segments were actually already released, the Lovecraft tale was released on dvd in 2012 (I have not seen it yet) and the Trancers one was released in 2013. However the segment I’m most excited for has yet to see the light of day, perhaps saving the best for last?

Anyway if you have not seen The Dungeonmaster I highly recommend hunting that down and watching it with plenty of booze and a good group of friends. It’s the perfect party flick. Don’t believe me check this out:

So the movie is planned to be released in it’s entirety on the Full Moon Streaming site, as far as I know it hasn’t been featured there yet but this news which may be old news to some of you has got me quite excited! It’s a rare treat when you find out that a movie that’s been shelved for over two decades gets a real release. In this case a movie I never even knew existed. Supposedly the company set to release the movie folded back in the late 80’s. So hopefully this will be worth the wait! 



Iron Maiden RETURNS & Eddie Goes to an Evil 80’s Arcade in Their New Video!! by petersaturday

Iron Maiden is the best metal band of all time and they’re back with a new album ready to drop! “Book of Souls” will be out on September 4th of this year and I’m totally pumped for it! I’m even more pumped to see them live again as they’re easily one of the best live bands out there despite the band forming way back in 1975. These guys have more spastic energy than most bands in their twenties and blend a good amount of amazing theatrics into their live shows. So now Maiden returns, a band not guilty as selling out or changing their sound like bands like Metallica remain guilty of doing. Nope Maiden has kept their sound true for the most part their entire career. 

They’ve got a brand new song called ‘Speed of Light’ that just so happens to haveT cool new video to go along with it. This one’s a classic style Iron Maiden power metal anthem! They’ve still got the metal magic so check this one out as their mascot ‘Eddie’ decides to hit the arcade and literally ends up being sucked inside of the video games!! I’m so pumped on this!!



Who Should Star as Freddy Krueger in the Next ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street’ Reboot?! by petersaturday

It seems these days Hollywood really isn’t all that interested in making good movies when it comes to our pop culture icons. Instead of giving the people what they really want they’ve continuously tried to give us all what THEY think we want. So it’s no surprise that they’re going to give us yet another go round at “A Nightmare on Elm Street”. The 2010 film was a failed attempt to modernize the story and give it to a whole new younger generation. The film was total bore and featured a new actor as Freddy Krueger. It came and went really without anyone giving a shit about it. Now it’s time again to try and revive the franchise which lead to the question of who’s going to wear the legendary glove? I’m fairly certain it’s NOT going to be Jackie Earle Haley, who did an ok job trying give Freddy a new spin. Still the fans were not happy with the flick. However fans of the franchise do clearly know what they want in A Nightmare on Elm Street and it ain’t a new actor playing Freddy!

So let’s just get this out of the way. Let’s not kid ourselves Hollywood. You want a successful new Nightmare on Elm Street movie? One that’s going to excite people? You want to make a big deal out of it? You want social media to go nuts about it? You of course want to make BIG money more than anything else, because we all know that’s what it’s really all about for Hollywood right? Well then listen up you greedy cash hogs to this here rather unimportant trivial little blogger who’s an actual real fan of the movies. It’s simple, get ROBERT ENGLUND back.

You don’t need a younger more hip actor to play Freddy. Nope. The people that wanna see this movie want one thing. The real Freddy. Englund is NOT too old for the role. Let’s face it his face is covered by latex it doesn’t matter if he’s 85 years old. People want the real deal. Have you really payed attention to what JJ is doing with Star Wars? Case closed. Robert Englund should be Freddy. You already know the answer to success here, don’t fuck it up again.



Green Room : Oregon Punk Rockers Battle Patrick Stewart’s Neo Nazi Skinhead Gang! by petersaturday

I’m totally excited to see ‘Green Room‘, the follow up to Jeremy Saulnier’s awesome revenge flick Blue Ruin due out later this year. The movie was filmed right here (where I live) in Portland Oregon and the surrounding wilderness. It features Anton Yelchin (Star Trek’s Chekov) as a member of a Punk rock band that strays into a secluded part of the Pacific Northwest to play a underground venue. If you’ve seen Blue Ruin already you know Sauliner’s got the chops to give a mean, gritty adventure that’s not your average cookie cutter Hollywood flick.

So far the reviews for this movie hail it as a throwback to the 80’s as the young punk band “The Ain’t Rights” show up at the punk rock gig at an odd venue out in the boonies only to find they’re playing on a bill that caters to a local neo Nazi scene in rural Oregon.

They decide against all better judgement to rip into a cover of the Dead Kennedys’ classic “Nazi Punks Fuck Off” and from that point on all hell breaks loose as they witness a act of violence and are targeted by the racist punk horde. 

The night becomes a fight for their life against the neo Nazi skinhead gang lead by none other than Patrick Stewart (Now that I’ve gotta see). This sounds like a awesome unique premise for a rural survival flick that’s bound to be quite a tense thriller! Sign me up, as long as the Nazi punks get exactly what they deserve in the end, fingers crossed!

  



VHS Verdict: ‘The Unholy’ Brings Those Pesky 80’s Demons to Church! by petersaturday

Here we have a rather rare VHS I ran across recently while doing some major thrift store shopping up in the north woods of Wisconsin! The Unholy is a pretty neat-o piece of 1980’s demon church cheeze! This is the kind of movie I really enjoy stumbling across.

The Unholy was released in 1988 and tells the story of a Father Michael (Ben Cross) who’s appointed to a church in New Orleans where two priests where murdered two years before. The movie’s pretty dang fun over all, giving you a ton weird ass 80’s goth night club types who perform violent looking mock rituals while the priest investigates the scenes in the New Orleans cult underground. If you’re intrigued by the over the top fashion and nightlife of the 1980’s you’ll dig this.

Of course Father Michael’s going to be ‘tempted’ by some rather ‘unholy’ racy, 80’s style, sexy situations by this demonic force running amuck. Yep this powerful sexy demon goes by the name “Desederious” and spends most of the time trying to seduce Father to the side of the Devil. Too bad Father Michael, despite being a priest doesn’t believe in demons or the Devil!

Ok now this is some scary shit.

Well it doesn’t take long before his mind is changed once weird shit begins occurring around the church! This one does drag a bit during the middle with a bit too much jibber jabber going on that quite honestly I could give two shits about. I mean c’mon let’s get on with this shit and have a demon battle already! Well thankfully the third act of this movie is pretty satisfying as a fan of 80’s monster movies this one gets pretty good once Desederious shows her true form and Father Michael loses his sex drive pretty damn quickly!

Yep we get some pretty fun little pesky mini demon minions running around and Desederious looks pretty ridiculously awesome in her true demon form running around on all fours. I mean if I saw that fucking weird ass thing appear in a dark alley I’d most definitely run for the hills while peeing my pants!

This one has a pretty decent cast, we even see Ned Beatty show up here, we get some fun as hell classic special effects and sweet 80’s fashion. if you can get through about 25 minutes of rather boring dialogue in the middle the third and final act will surely deliver the goods!! Seek this one out if you can and if you’re a true fan of C-movie 80’s horror!



R.I.P. Rowdy Roddy Piper!! by petersaturday

Some sad news hit us today as we have just learned Roddy Piper Passed away unexpectedly today from cardiac arrest. Roddy was a legend as a wrestler and also as an actor, starring in some of my favorite popcorn flicks like ‘Hell Comes to Frogtown’ and ‘They Live’.

Piper was only 61 years old too and from what I understand has several movies set to be released and a few he was still working on. One I’d been most excited for is ‘Portal to Hell‘ which I covered here a while back as well as a few other movies in post production ‘The Chair’, ‘Green Fairy’ and ‘Betting on Baker’ which I’m going to have to do a little investigating on now.

He also this year, had a cool graphic novel released Rowdy ‘Roddy Piper: Monster Killer’ that I need to check out and also his popular podcast called Piper’s Pit he’s been doing for quite some time now. So a sad moment as he was a legend and had so much more to offer us all. He was a big part of my childhood as my favorite pro wrestling villain of all time! You’ll be missed Roddy! Check these out for some classic Piper! The first one is pretty awesome, the pilot for the TV show “Tag Team” which a lot of people never even knew existed!

 




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